#i decided to stop trying it only ever results in stress for me lol
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i hate writing cvs and teachers r useless at help i love them and i appreciate it but "i have no skills to put on my cv what should i put" - "aww no everyone has skills just think of something"
#SAME WITH REFERENCES#like i dont know people#it reminds me of when i tried to ask for another way to do a piece of homework because you needed to ask multiple people things#and my teacher refused to believe that i truly did not have a single friend to ask#and then finally went ok but said to ask other kids in my class#ma'am i had a panic attack after texting someone a simple message i truly cannot physically do that without passing out#i did not do the homework i couldnt be bothered to make up answers#so much of psychology was that though lol i just had to make up friends and answers#thats so humiliating to admit actually#see i used to be so sad that i didnt have friends but im not rlly anymore / srs#i havent had friends in years let alone close friends#i decided to stop trying it only ever results in stress for me lol#i dont even knkw what to talk about#like people dont rlly care about ur goals or interests or sharing theres or hobbies like what do we even do#its more lonely to have friends then not i think#and it does suck being alone but you get used to it even if ur extroverted and drained like me LMAO#its not like im anti social i just dont put myself out there#i want to live in a city apartment and fill it with pretty things#and learn an instrument#and get a pet#it's 2am im rambling im tired LMAO
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Fanfic ask game - L and M!
L: How many times do you usually revise your fic/chapter before posting?
After I finish a chapter. I self edit two to three times than I send it to my sister to read. She'll correct my grammar. After her feedback I edit again. Send it to her to re-read. And then if I'm feeling paranoid I'll read through it incase I need to edit a second time.
After posting I tend to ignore it for a while, writing the other chapters til I decide to read through it again and it more than often results in me editing it here and there.
M: Got any premises on the back burner that you'd care to share?
I'm assuming I answered the question incorrectly last time which is my bad. I'll tell the stories and ideas I've thought about but done nothing with nor do I think I ever will do anything with. And for fun and it make it easy on others I'll give everything names.
The Fraggers!: LOL So Lobo, New 52 Lobo, Sheba (who I think was supposed to take Lobo's spot in New 52 before they created New 25 Lobo), Slobo from Young Justice, Crush/Xiomara Rojas Lobo's daughter, and my OC Leah (fun fact I created her when I was 11) get forced into an Alien Family Game Show. Sort of like Big Brother except it's families competing other families. Everyone agrees to it because there's this huge cash reward for winning. And everyone in the family likes money to some degree. Crush is lucky to have Slobo because he's the one making sure Lobo doesn't betray everyone. There's supposed to be bonding and fights. The Lobos keep fighting for the name and because they think they know how to handle teenagers better than the other.
Maggie Opal: It's about a young adult girl with an imaginary troll friend/boyfriend named Hank. Our girl basically has schizophrenia and is leaving in a shitty life. People start going missing in her town including our girl's bully so she looks into it. It's played throughout the whole story that magic isn't real. Like the woman kidnapping and killing people is labeled a "Hag" but she's not supposed to be. Until Maggie finds out she's pregnant which makes no sense to her because she's only done sexual things with her imaginary boyfriend. And than plot twist magic is real. Our girl hasn't been imaging anything. Hank is an actual troll. The woman she fought was an actual Hag. Magic just doesn't have a kewl color effect or anything like that. And Maggic never realized the truth because her extension of belief was too strong.
Yandere Boyfriend: A yandere killer becomes obsessed with a detective. So he's been going after and killing criminals that the law's been letting get away due to the lack of evidence, lawyers, or simply because the person has money and power. So our yandere has been playing Dexter, murdering them in the hopes our detective will fall in love with him that way and or to make their life less stressful. Of course the detective will catch on and try to stop the yandere despite believing he's doing the right thing because a crime is a crime. I even thought about the yandere having a pet turtle name Mr. Williams who he talks to about everything.
Demi: It's my demigod college AU story. Like Nicktoons it's gonna be a freak of the week so different stories about different characters at the time. All the characters are somewhere between 18 to 30 years old unless they're a staff member. I guess the premise is "I the writer love mythos and fables."
The last two are connected to my posted fics. One being Hellsing Dracula, which is the story Dracula but what I think the Hellsing's version of it is. Because as much as Hellsing is accurate to Bram Stroker's Dracula, it also isn't. So I figured it would be fun. The second would be a different story of how Shirley and Alucard met. Although I don't think it would be a good read which is why I've done nothing with it. Next would be my altered version of Nicktoon episodes and movies but in my universe. Again never done anything because I think I can explain those events through the Nicktoon series. I guess a fanfic for Dracula vs Hitler being it's my guilty pleasure book but it's too insane to every do anything with. And lastly the Future Hellsing/Blue Exorcist crossover but I need to finish the previous stories before heading to the that one.
Hopefully I answered the question correctly this time lol. I don't know what else to say I don't really come up with themes or messages for stories. At least not before I write them I just pants the stories.
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I posted 117 times in 2022
10 posts created (9%)
107 posts reblogged (91%)
Blogs I reblogged the most:
@ao719
@burnsoslow
@charlotteg234
@kingliam2019
@dcbbw
I tagged 23 of my posts in 2022
#queued - 9 posts
#the royal romance - 5 posts
#king liam - 5 posts
#liam x mc - 5 posts
#trr - 5 posts
#liam x riley - 5 posts
#bbrandy2002 - 3 posts
#fools rush in - 3 posts
#long post - 2 posts
#choices - 2 posts
Longest Tag: 35 characters
#who says we dont work in the summer
My Top Posts in 2022:
#5
Happy Sunday @charlotteg234
🥵 Enjoy!
13 notes - Posted April 10, 2022
#4
An Apology
Several months ago I accused someone of sending me a hate anon. I've thought about that ordeal from time to time, but even more so recently.
Being in a place in my life where Im not so stressed out anymore or disillusioned by every little thing, Im able to make rational thoughts and think things through a little clearer. Looking back at old messages with someone else, I have a pretty solid feeling I know who actually did send them and thankfully they're not around here any longer.
With that said, when Im wrong, I say Im wrong. And in that instance ... I was wrong. Even if I never said her name publicly, I would like to apologize to @queenrileyrose for my accusations and the hurt you experienced following that. I've already done so privately and the nature of that conversation will remain so.
I can't undo what happened, I can only try to make it right.
Here's to 2022 being about positivity and kindness. Again, my humblest apologies to QRR.
13 notes - Posted January 3, 2022
#3
Happy Birthday to ...me lol
I have to take a moment here to show off these two amazing commissions my bestie @burnsoslow and my great friend @ao719 had done for my birthday.
The first piece by Burns is from her ORDIV Ch 33 when Liam proposed to Riley in the gazebo at Valtoria where the had their first day 🥺🥺🥺
The second one is from Anitah, who used a scene from the fic Burns wrote for my birthday last year Heaven, Hell or Houston when Liam and Riley had met at the bar and when on this whirlwind date, kissing at every stop light 😍
Two of my favorite scenes captured so perfectly and it makes my heart swell so big.
Thank you both so much for these precious works that I will cherish and most likely stare at everyday for weeks to come. I love you both with all my heart and thank you for making another year of getting older a lot more bearable and for your friendship that I value so hard!
59 notes - Posted May 19, 2022
#2
Fools Rush In
Chapter 21
Book: TRR
Pairing: Liam x Riley
Series Premise: With two weeks before he is set to marry Madeleine, the guys throw Liam an impromptu bachelor party that results in him (and Drake) leaving Vegas with more than he bargained for.
Word count: 3900 -ish
Warning: Language
Soooo ... hey lol It's been a hot minute since I've written or posted anything (or just been around in general). Anyway, I came back to several messages asking about this chapter. I actually had 90% of it written back in October and just thought it was pure shit and gave up on it ... actually, I gave up on writing altogether. Having some time this week, I opened up the doc, rewrote some things, deleted out some stuff and finally managed to finish it. It's still not even close to what I wanted it to be, as it's the end of this arc, but I've decided to just have fun writing again. If there's anything Ive learned during my time away it's that none of us will ever write the perfect story, or use the perfect words, or have the most compelling characters and it's okay; I think I finally have accepted that. Just have fun doing it!
This concludes my TedTalk
---------------------------
“Doctor ... Wolfschitz?” a bewildered Alyssa questioned.
“That’s no damn doctor!” Drake bore his eyes into the former prince, who was already howling with laughter, dodging a pillow that whirled in his direction from Drake. “What the actual fuck is your problem, Leo?”
Leo clutched his side, trying to catch his breath. “The look on your face, man … I can't. I really had you going there for a minute didn’t I, Walker? Afraid you were about to lose that new pee-pee, huh?” He continued to laugh riotously at Drake’s expense before his gaze hastily shifted its attention toward Alyssa. “Why’d you blow my cover, thong girl?”
“Thong girl? Alyssa muttered, absentmindedly crossing her legs while attempting to hide the fact her face was quickly glowing bright pink. How’d he know I was wearing one?
“Why are you here, Leo?” Drake repeated as Leo casually strolled up to his bed and scooped up a chocolate pudding cup from Drake’s food tray. “And how in the sam hell did you even know I was in the hospital?
“Came with Liam,” he replied nonchalantly as he plopped his ass down on the end of the bed and peeled off the top of his pudding cup, licking the plastic wrap clean. “He’s down the hall with Riley right now. Seems my little brother is a prized stud after all … got that Rys sperm in him, ya know? Knocked her up real good yo. Hafta say … I’m impressed.”
“Knocked her up?” Alyssa gasped before stepping closer to him. “Hold up; Riley’s pregnant?”
Leo nodded and shoveled a giant heap of pudding into his mouth. “Yeah. I’m going to be an uncle again --” he eyed Drake’s plate contemplatively, “ -- You gonna eat the rest of that meatloaf, man?” Drake scowled and pushed his tray toward the hungry Prince.
Alyssa quickly put all the clues together. “So that’s why Riley was so sick earlier? She didn’t have a concussion, --” she smiled endearingly, “ -- she just had morning sickness. ... Well, is she okay? Is the baby okay? The fall didn’t hurt them, did it?”
Leo, concentrating on finishing the rest of that meatloaf, languidly shrugged. “I dunno.”
“Well, did they at least give her something safe for her back pain yet?” Alyssa probed further.
Leo shoved another large bite of meatloaf and again answered. “I dunno.”
“Oh my God! Do you know anything?” A frustrated Alyssa finally asked.
With a mouthful of food, Leo tilted his head back in deep thought and replied the best he could, “I know this meatloaf is fucking BOMB, dude. Not too shabby for hospital grub.” He swallowed heartily. “The pudding on the other hand … absolute shit.” He tapped the edge of the plastic container with his plastic spoon as he spoke to it, “Snack-Pak, you disappoint me.”
Desperate for an answer, Alyssa reached out and grasped Leo’s shirt, jerking him closer. “Fuck the snack-pak, Wolfshitz; what about Riley?”
“Riley? Oh, she never disappoints me …” Leo sideways glanced with a frown. “Liam on the other hand ...”
Stunned by this strange man’s erratic and seemingly unhinged behavior, Alyssa shot a wide-eyed glare at Drake, who just shook his head slowly. “Don’t try to make sense of him, Alyssa. Just don’t. You’ll never be able to figure him out.”
Needing to be reassured, Alyssa pulled a cell phone from her back pocket and started furiously shooting off a text to Riley. While her back was turned to the men, Drake couldn’t help but notice the way her ass hugged perfectly in those skinny jeans and soon realized his new body part had showed up in tandem with his sudden arousal. With Leo’s interest remaining focused on the damn meatloaf for the time being, Drake eased a hand under the white sheet covering him and felt around the area below his waist; his breath hitched with relief at the rock-solid bulge that had erupted. Feeling a little giddy that everything was working as it should, the euphoria soon subsided when he caught a glimpse of Leo’s saucy gaze on Alyssa.
Overcome with a strong sense of jealousy over the girl he’d just caught sneaking a peek at his naked self less than five minutes ago, Drake quietly urged through gritted teeth, “Stop looking at her like that, Leo! She’s not some conquest you can just sack for your sick playboy pleasures.”
“Says the guy who caught panty crickets from a $2 hooker and needed a dick transplant.” Leo retorted with a smirk. “Besides, father always said, ‘I see it, I like it, I want it, I got it.” He wagged his tongue in lust. “And I see that.” He motioned to Alyssa’s backside.
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73 notes - Posted April 7, 2022
My #1 post of 2022
First Comes Love
Chapter One
Book: The Royal Romance -Complete AU
Pairing:Liam x Riley/Liam x Madeleine (I promise Maddie’s nice here)
A/N: This will most likely be a mini-series; no more than 5 or 6 chapters.This is loosely based on a movie you might recognize but I’ve tried to make it my own.
Series Premise: It's destiny when two people from different worlds meet. Riley is an up-and-coming wedding planner who finds herself tasked with planning the biggest wedding of her career, only to find out the man she fell for after a brief encounter in NYC is the groom ... and a king.
Trigger Warnings: There is a mention of suicidal ideation, but it’s not part of the plot. Some minor language.
Thank you @burnsoslow for pre-reading. All grammar errors are my own.
It’s been so long since I’ve started a new fic, I don’t even know if I have a taglist that isn’t filled with people who have left or hate me now; I guess I’m starting all over again. If you want tagged, let me know.
New York City
Liam zoned out 2.1 seconds after stepping inside a trendy office on the upper floors of a high-rise building in downtown Manhattan. The pale pink shades of the walls, decorative cushions, window scarfing, and gloss on the lips of his future bride, screamed out bottles of Pepto to the new King -- if only he had some to help with the unease in the pit of stomach.
That morning, a meeting with a highly renowned woman was on the agenda, discussing and presenting potential options for his upcoming nuptials, just weeks away. Even under normal circumstances, a wedding wasn’t exactly something that excited Liam. Not that he was never thrilled for the couple and wished them all the happiness in the world, it just held little importance in his day-to-day life. Weddings served as yet another reminder of what he wanted -- and what he couldn't have.
It was amusing to Liam how he could hold so much power, yet wielded none of it for himself.
This wasn’t how it was supposed to be.
The owner of this particular firm, Jill Gordon, had built quite the reputation as the elite among modern event design, planning, and production companies, with a specialty in weddings. The clientele included a long list of celebrities, politicians, affluent Manhattan debutantes, and occasionally acquired foreign business. The latter is how Madeleine first heard of The Jill Gordon Company while attending the French Ambassador's ceremony several months ago as a representative for Cordonia. With the last stop of their engagement tour in New York City, the future queen was eager to add a visit to her appointment book before they returned home and began the laborious task of planning the biggest wedding in Cordonian history.
Although the palace had more than their fair share of staff with experience hosting monumental events, such as balls, state dinners, and various celebrations, there hadn’t been a royal wedding there in over 20 years. Madeleine thought someone with experience handling grand-scale weddings with a sophisticated flair, who could share their vision and expertise with the staff and take charge of the arrangements, would guarantee everything went off without a hitch.
The King simply went along to get along.
Madeleine and Liam sat across from Jill at her glass-top desk, where a single, lone laptop sat catty-corner on top. While the owner enthused and embellished her business to an attentive Madeleine, Liam focused on the assemblage of black-and-white portraits meticulously placed in neat rows along the wall behind the woman’s desk. It was no doubt a deliberate focal point to showcase the clients her agency had done work for in the past. Maybe others who had previously sat in the same chair he sat in at that moment were charmed with the love and joy captured in each of those images; the twinge in Liam’s heart wasn’t buying into it.
After a lengthy social season and with a lot of pressure from his father and the council, he’d chosen Madeleine to become his queen. At first, he couldn’t stand her -- Hell, maybe he never could. She was pretentious, overbearing, cunning, and frequently insensitive. But somewhere between his coronation and the beginning of the tour, she changed almost as if overnight. At that first stop in Fydelia, he noticed a more relaxed, more thoughtful, and just easier to be around Madeleine. It’s possible she’d finally gotten the coveted prize she had obsessed over long before being dumped after Leo abdicated and could put aside some of that anxiety that brought out the worst in her. But to Liam, it seemed to be a little something more: either the Countess had come to her senses about her standoffish behavior, or maybe it was this new business venture Hana and Rashad talked her into, causing a distraction for the Countess.
Whatever it was, was a welcome change. Liam had grown to respect her, find some common ground, and put away some of that overwhelming dread about spending the rest of his life with her. And while it was no secret between the two that there wasn’t more than friendly affection, duty made no exceptions when it came to their obligation.
For both of them, that's precisely what this was. Now it was time to make the best of it and move forward.
Jill sat forward in her swivel chair with a warm smile. Her hands splayed on the glass top as she spoke in a refined tone. “I have the perfect person in mind to handle such an important wedding, as yours… that is if you choose to go with us.” Jill quickly added, not wanting to scare them off with too much pressure, too soon. She knew adding a royal wedding to her list would attract mass attention in the press and social circles for her business, which meant huge profits.
“Really?” Madeleine crowed, glancing over at Liam, who promptly brandished an over-enthused smile before she turned her attention back to Jill. “Tell us more about her.”
“Elaine has over twenty-three years of experience and is the best in this business, and has served most of our biggest named clients. She recently planned the President’s granddaughter’s wedding.” Jill boasted.
“I heard of that one …” Madeleine swooned before adding, “glamorous, yet sophisticated and classy, which is exactly what we’re looking for. Would she have time to meet with us now?”
Jill frowned. “I apologize, but she’s actually booked for the day, preparing for another wedding this evening. A busy lady that one is. Let me see what her calendar looks like.” She moved the mouse beside her laptop around and clicked a few times, pausing momentarily to scan the screen. “She’s free in the morning if you’re able to return then.”
Liam, who had been studying the glass wall that separated Jill’s office from the reception area and wondering why in the hell anyone would want to be watched while they worked, finally contributed to the discussion for the first time since walking in. “We’re actually leaving first thing in the morning.”
“Not until 9:30,” Madeleine hastily clarified. She continued cheerfully, “Tonight marks the official end of our engagement tour, and we’re wrapping up with a celebration in Midtown. We fly out tomorrow.”
“That's wonderful!" Jill replied. "Perhaps the two of you can stop in before your flight in the morning and meet Elaine personally and see if we can work out an agreement. I don’t think you’ll regret it,” she trilled, able to conceal the shameless desperation behind her words like a true professional.
Well schooled in body language and tone, Liam smirked to himself, able to hear it anyway.
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119 notes - Posted January 2, 2022
Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →
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ello! saw your post and i wanna request a moon knight in which the reader is a female and she just graduated uni and the moon boys take turns in bed praising her like "our smart pretty girl", "so independent" of course if you are comfortable writing this have a good day/night :)
Praises // Moon Knight boys ☾ x fem!reader
A/N: Thank you for this request, I’ve been desperate to write something like this again! Also if anyone is at university or college, good luck with any exams/essays/results, I know how difficult it can be but trust me, it’s worth it in the end!
Tags: 18+ readers only, smut, dom/sub, anxiety, fluff, begging, sub steven, dom marc, dom jake, overstimulation, multiple orgasms, squirting, oral sex (f!recieving), creampie, pet names, shower sex, multiple sex positions, fingering, crying, praise kink, sir kink, daddy kink, aftercare, intense orgasms, pain/pleasure, bdsm, literally this is filthy lol, not beta read im sorry for mistakes
Word: 7.6k (oops)
my masterlist 📚 AO3 Link
The hardwood floor creaked beneath your sock-covered feet as you paced back and forth across the flat you shared with the boys. You’d been at it since the moment you’d awakened that day, anxiety rippling through your body so drastically that pacing was the only action you could complete without the overwhelming feeling of throwing up or passing out.
It was the day you’d been waiting for years, results day. And for some unknown reason, the University had decided to release the results in the evening rather than midday which only caused you to overthink everything you had ever done whilst at uni. What if the results are out late because you failed? What if you have to waste another whole year resitting it? Shaking your head, you tried to let your mind go blank before you spiralled into a deep pit.
Steven watched you from his seat on the sofa, his own nerves bubbling in his stomach, hands wringing in his lap as he glanced at the clock for what felt like the 400th time that day. He desperately wanted you to get your results, he knew for sure that you’d passed but he absolutely hated seeing you this worked up.
Usually, Steven was always the one to be able to help best with your anxieties, compared to Jake and Marc. But today, he felt completely helpless as he watched you continue to pace the same path continuously for hours on end.
“Uh… Love, why don’t you have something to drink, you haven’t had anything all day”, Steven tried to reason with you, his voice trying to be soft and calm and would usually have you crawling into his lap but today, your mind couldn’t even process anything that he said.
Instead, your eyes remained glued to the screen of the laptop that was on the desk between you and Steven, so that he couldn’t see the screen. Your reasoning is that if you failed, you didn’t want him to read the words.
Steven shook his head as you continued to pace, briefly glancing at the mirror as Marc demanded that he make you drink. “I can’t force her to do anything mate” Steven mumbled in reply.
Marc rolled his eyes in announced in the mirror, not that you could see or hear his reply, “You know what Steven, maybe you should force her, it’s been nearly 20 hours since she’s had anything to eat or drink”.
“You do it then mate, I’m not having her hating me when she’s so stressed out-” BING.
Both you and Steven stopped immediately at the recognisable email notification noise. The air in the room suddenly felt thick and heavy as you slowly reached for the laptop, fingers shaking as you were one click away from finding out the much-anticipated results. Steven sat on the edge of the sofa, watching you closely to try and read any sort of expression that would give your results away.
Your heartbeat pounded in your ears as you finally plucked up the courage to click on that all-important email.
You couldn’t breathe for a second, eyes becoming painful from the length of time that you’d gone without blinking until finally, you whispered, “I did it”.
Steven stood so quick his vision blurred as he shouted, “you did it?”
“I did it!” you screamed, reading the word congratulations over and over on the computer screen, the realisation finally set in as you sprinted around the table and jumped into Steven’s arms, causing you both to topple backwards onto the sofa, your legs straddling his body as he held you to him. Both of you were screaming and shouting with joy, you even briefly felt bad for the neighbours but you also didn’t care as happy tears slipped down your cheeks.
You weren’t sure when but the tears soon turned into sobs, all the years, countless nights not sleeping, the essays and exams had all been worth it for this moment. Steven held you close, catching every tear that escape your eyes, his lips brushing against your forehead.
“Oh my beautiful, smart girl” he praised, lips moving across your face until there wasn’t a patch of skin he hadn’t kissed as he continued to compliment you until finally, you stopped sobbing, instead smiling so much that your cheeks ached, which Steven was reciprocating with proud bright eyes.
“I can’t believe it,” you said in a rush, leaning your forehead against his whilst his hands settled against your waist, thumb rubbing small circles over your clothes.
“I never doubted you for a second, Love” Steven bragged, one of his hands moving to cup your cheek which you swiftly nuzzled into. Your boyfriend kissed your lips once more, twice, three times before you pressed harder, with all the eagerness that you could muster, knuckles aching with how tightly you were holding onto his shirt. His soft lips moved with yours, the taste of toast on the tip of your tongue as it slipped in, caressing his own.
Steven moaned, hands both now cupping the back of your head, keeping you close to him as you both became lost in one another's lips. It was only as your lungs burned for the need of air did you pull away, but only to tug on the bottom of his shirt, desperate to feel more of him, your hips rolling down onto his crotch, already feeling this thickening cock, only separated from your cunt by a few layers of material.
Leaning forward, you were able to finally free him of the shirt, his warm beautiful skin flexing under your fingers as they danced along the skin, needing to feel every part of him as those wondrous lips of his travelled down your throat, leaving delicate kisses that had your body shivering in response. “My smart girl, my beautiful smart girl” he mumbled, and you mewled with each praise, loving when Steven was so appreciative of you, which he usually was.
It was only as you reached down to undo his jeans were you stopped by his hands enveloping yours, halting your actions. A frown set across your features as Steven sat back on the sofa so you were able to look at his face.
“Sorry Darlin’, Marc he- he keeps shouting at me and it’s only getting worse. I promise we can continue this but I really need you to drink something”.
You sat back against his knees, hands raising to Steven’s cheeks, thumb rubbing against his cheekbone as you knew the next words would probably get you in trouble but you didn’t care, Marc was ruining a perfectly good moment. “Well… fuck Marc, I’m busy”.
Steven’s head tipped back as he laughed, his eyes creasing as his hands returned to the back of your head, pulling you forward, “oh I’m sure you’ll be paying for that one later”. His lips moulded with yours once more, both of you moaning at the contact, his scents were filling your senses as you turned your head, causing the kiss to go deeper, his tongue flicking out and dancing with your own.
Steven was very good at distractions so you weren’t expecting for him to flip your position so now you were the one on the sofa, lying down with him hovering over you. It was now your turn to be undressed and he moved with delicate touches, making sure to lightly touch your skin as he removed each article of clothing leaving goosebumps across your body.
In between your legs was throbbing uncontrollably, your panties visibly wet as he pulled them down your legs and discarded them across the room. You needed him, you needed him now.
Reaching up to try and pull him down, you whined as he moved out of your reach, his lips kissing the tips of your fingers as he smiled down at you, “Shh my clever girl, let me take care of you”. You didn’t respond, not sure you could even form a proper word as arousal turned your brain to fuzz. Particularly as you lay there and watched the half-naked Steven move lower, hands now on the back of your thighs pushing up until you were completely exposed to him, the cool air causing your sweet cunt to clench around nothing.
He didn’t break eye contact, as he lowered his face, tongue out until finally, he licked the length of your core, savouring the unique taste that was only you. Both of you moaned deeply, his movements were slow, calculated like they always were. Steven was a passionate lover, more submissive than the other two but that mean that all he wanted to do was pleasure you, never caring if he came, only caring that you were taken care of.
His talented tongue moved up your slit, reaching your throbbing bean, circling it slowly, adding the slightest bit of pressure, making sure to really build up your already heightened arousal. At the same time, his long fingers moved to your entrance, circling it in the same manner as his tongue and slowly, you watched him slip one finger in, your mouth hung open, a constant stream of moans leaving it, only spurring Steven on.
The man didn’t do anything special with his fingers, for now, that was for later, instead, he simply felt the velvety warm walls, stretching you enough to slip in a second finger, rocking them both in and out as a single dark curl fell onto his forehead. Your hand reached out, sliding through his hair, not being rough, you could never be rough with Steven but simply scratching his scalp, silently telling him that he was doing good, perfect in fact.
Steven watched you for a few moments, continuing his slow actions, knowing that he was going to make you cum in the next minute but wanting to have the image of you moaning, glossy-eyed and desperate, engraved into his brain.
Removing his mouth from your centre, he beamed, “I’m so proud of you”. Steven's lips then seal around your clit, sucking it into his mouth whilst at the same time starting to curl his fingers, pumping his hand and the tingling sensation rushed over you before you could fully process his words. Releasing your clit, his tongue swiped across with firm pressure whilst his fingers didn’t stop the movements, Steven became aware that his chin and neck were becoming wet as you squirted over him, eyes rolling back, the hand in his hair moving to the sofa so you didn’t pull out his hair, needing to grip something as your core tightened violently until finally, you came.
Your cunt convulsed around his fingers, your body spasming as Steven’s fingers slowed until eventually, he pulled them out, his tongue licking up every drip of your juices. He smiled down at you, cheeks flushed as he could see the happy smile spread across your face, “I need you, Steven”.
“You can have me Love, but not here, you deserve the bed, not the sofa, come on”, tugging on your hand, he helped you up, chuckling at the slight wobbling of your legs but the distance to the bed wasn’t long and you were soon pushing him into the middle, crawling up until you were straddling his lap. Once again, however, Steven switched your positions, shaking his head as he smiled mischievously down at you. “How ever will I treat my ever so clever girl, passing her degree all by herself”.
“Steven please”, he never usually had you begging like this, that was more Jake's job but Steven couldn’t help himself today, he wanted you to feel amazing. Reaching up, you gripped his hair, pulling his face down so you could hungrily kiss him, tongues clashing together, teeth nipping on lips.
The man hovering over you reached between your bodies, fumbling to undo his jeans with shaky hands, his cock almost painful with how hard he was, he relieved sigh escaped his lips that were still attached to yours as his member was finally freed. You noticed his reaction and instantly reached for him, tossing him off a few times, enjoying the way he bucked his hips with your movements, before angling it towards your entrance, not even giving him time to fully take off the remainder of his clothes.
You both groaned deeply as he finally slide his thick hard cock into your quivering hole, your arousal enough to be a natural lube as he easily filled you inch after inch until finally you were both slotted together.
Sex with Steven was never the same as with Marc or Jake. It was never rushed, aggressive or filled with fancy sex positions. No, it was always sensual, and passionate and he knew your body better than your own but he was always modest about it, simply smiling down at you like you were the only thing that mattered in the world. Obviously Marc and Jake thought the same but sex with them was just…different, you loved them all equally especially as they were all so unique.
Your back arched up as Steven started to pull out, his thrusts were long and deep, and his hands were interlocked with your own, held above your head whilst his lips travelled down the length of your throat. Every drag of his hips had you clinging harder to him, as he built up your pleasure until he had to cuming just as hard as the first time, your cunt clenching hard around him that he too came, your name spilt from his lips in desperation, arms wobbling to keep himself up as he stilled within.
After a few moments of trying to catch your breaths, he rolled off of you, his hand coming up to stroke your cheek as both of you smiled at each other like idiots in love. Closing your eyes, you savoured the after-sex glow, listening to each other breath.
“You know… you really do need to eat something Poppet. How about we go to dinner? Celebrate the great news, have a few drinks?”
“I would love that very much, Mr Grant. Let me just have a quick shower”, you lean up to kiss him, standing and doing the awkward run to the bathroom, hands between your legs to stop any of his cum from dripping onto the floor.
Stepping into the shower, you let the warm water spill over your body, relaxing your muscles. The reality of passing university brushed over your thoughts again as you did a happy dance in the shower, quickly before washing your body.
You’d become so lost in your happy little thoughts that you didn’t hear the other person enter the bathroom, not until a warm solid body collided with your back. Smiling to yourself, you leaned into the warmth, feeling the already hardening cock against your lower back. “Ready for another round are you, my love?” you asked innocently.
As you made to turn around, a muscular arm circled around your front, gripping your jaw in a strong grip so you were now held firmly in place. Definitely not Steven.
The hand holding your jaw pushed upwards, tipping your head back so that the shower sprayed across your face, lips moved to your ears, tickling and teasing as a low voice murmured, “Fuck Marc? Did I hear you correctly?”
You knew he could feel the pounding of your heart as he held your jaw, his teeth nipping your ear as you rubbed your thighs together, cunt clenching in anticipation, you didn’t date speak. It was always the game of cat and mouse when it came to Marc and your relationship but in the end, Marc always was the winner.
“All you needed to do…was to have one drink of water, just one”. You were hyperaware of every single movement that he made as he raised his spare hand to rest lightly against your naked hip, keeping you close to him.
“Well we were slightly distracted…sir”, you added the name for good measure, not wanting to annoy him any further.
His lips turned up slightly at your words but he didn’t say anything for a few minutes, leaving the anticipation thick in the air until at least, he squeezed your jaw, demanding you open. Immediately you opened your mouth wide, the water from the shower dribbling out and down your chin.
“Drink.”
You drank the water as it poured down from the shower, gulping the water thirstily.
“Good girl”, he whispered, feeling every time you swallowed whilst he continued to hold your jaw. His words sent shivers up your spine, causing it to rub harder against his cock that throbbed against you.
As your gulps started to slow down and Marc was happy with your water intake, he spun you around, pressing your back against the cool tiles, hand still holding onto your jaw, the other now leaning against the wall above you. Reaching down to your height, his back now had the shower beating against it so you weren’t being sprayed anymore.
Slowly, you raised your eyes from the floor, up his body to his dark beautiful eyes. Even though he shared the same body as Steven and Jake, he still looked different, you weren’t sure whether it was the hardening of the gaze in his eyes or the beautiful smirk that he held on his lips but either way, it brought a sly smile to your own mouth, having not seen him for a week.
“I hear congratulations are in order, you beautiful intelligent girl.” Pride and love bloomed in your chest.
“Thank you, sir”. So distracted by his handsome face, you didn’t notice the hand he had used to lean against the wall, slip down until his calloused fingertip started rubbing against your eagerly awaiting clit, causing you to cry out.
“I’m so proud of you, baby girl”.
“Tha-thank you, sir. I couldn’t have done it without you-ah!” Marc had slipped two fingers into your centre, his thumb now rubbing slow methodical circles against your bundle of nerves, your hips began moving with the action instantly. He watched you closely, his eyes devouring your every move.
Marc didn’t quicken his pace as he continued talking, the two fingers within you moving in and out steadily, “Now, I think my baby girl deserves a reward, what do you say?” You could only nod, moaning at his clever hands. “You’ve done so amazingly over these last few years. I want to pleasure you until you can’t walk and then we’ll order some food, no need to leave this place when I’ve got to make you feel good, baby.”
The mere thought of what he had planned had your core tightening, the tingles already spreading down your thighs as you breathed out, “I’m close, sir.”
“You want to cum for daddy?”
“Yes please, daddy”. His fingers moved quicker, bending at the perfect angle as his mouth dropped to suck one of your erect nipples, your hands instantly moving to hold onto his wrist that still held your jaw.
“Then cum for me, baby”. You did. Hard. The wind was knocked out of you as your knees wobbled, nails digging into his skin as your pussy contracted around his fingers.
Releasing your nipple with a pop, Marc moved quickly, turning you around, not giving you time to process what was happening as you found your face pushed against the shower wall. The water then stopped spraying the two of your as he turned it off, pulling your hips backwards leaving you slightly bent over.
Your boyfriend then proceeded to lick your cunt dry, you twitch at the oversensitiveness, automatically moving away from his warm tongue as it lapped over your swollen bud. “Shh, it’s ok Sweetheart”, he kisses both of your arse cheeks, “no more clit play unless you ask”.
Sighing in slight relief, you wiggled your hips as he stood to his full height. Glancing over your shoulder, you moaned, “mmm, want your cock sir”.
“Ok baby girl”, he was penetrating you a second later, your sensitive walls already clenching around him. Having already been fucked by Steven already today, you didn’t need time to adjust and Marc knew that as he started a quick, hard and thorough pace, his hand tugging on your hair so your neck ached at the odd angle, the sounds of your bodies slapping together like music to his ears. “My good girl, my very clever pretty girl”.
You were grunting with each thrust, trying your best to not cum already, it had only been two minutes but you were so sensitive from the previous activities. “I…I already need to cum sir, I don’t think I can hold it, I’m sorry”.
“That’s ok baby, cum for me, that’s it”, your knees buckled as you came, your insides felt like they were on fire as every nerve poured with pleasure, it took you a second to realise that Marc had his arm around your middle stopping you from collapsing to the floor. Easing out of you, he helped you out of the shower after you had found your footing, you stepped out, holding his hand but soon were leaning up to heavily kiss him, realising that you hadn’t even kissed him since he began fronting.
You could feel yourself becoming needier the more feverish the kiss became, enough so that your hand slipped down to grip Marc’s still incredibly hard cock, trying to please him but his hand caught your wrist stopping your movements. Breaking the kiss, Marc looked into your eyes, smirking slightly at your bratty whine.
“Do you want to stop? I need to hear your words?”
“I want you to cum in my pussy, please don’t stop sir” you desperately replied.
Marc didn’t need to be told twice as you found yourself being manhandled by him once more, as he pushed you over the sink, thrusting into your core, pulling on your hair like he had in the shower but now you were faced with the bathroom mirror so you could watch Marc pounded into you.
Leaning over until his lips were next to your ear, with each pound of his hips, Marc praised you, much like how Steven did, about how you were such a smart girl, you’ve done so well, his little university graduate. Your cunt clenched with his words, feeling both fucked out of your mind and proud of yourself at the same moment was hard to comprehend but he made you feel so special. Marc was always a soft dom, he would praise you no matter what, even in your brattiest of moments, but he just loved looking after his baby girl, not like Jake, he liked to handle those moments in different styles, not that you would ever want to be bratty with Jake.
Marc’s other hand which had been holding on to your hips with a fierce grip, moved to your torso, fondling your tits, squeezing the soft flesh, as his lips sucked into the side of your neck lightly. You tried to speak to tell him you were going to cum but the only noises to leave you were heavy moans Marc could tell you were getting close by the fluttering that your cunt was doing around his cock, he had been trying to hold off for a while, seeing you bent over in the shower nearly had him spurting his seed over your back but he held out for as long as he could to see just how much you could handle.
“That’s it, baby, cum with me, well done, good girl”, your core felt impossibly tight as finally, your orgasm rippled through your body. Marc was thankful that you were over the sink, his own orgasm making his knees wobble slightly so that he had to hold onto the side next to your hips to keep himself up as he shouted your name out.
He kissed a line up your back as you tried to catch your breath, his cock slipping out of you followed by his hot seed dripping out and onto the floor. He then spent a few quiet moments cleaning you up, wiping away his cum as softly as he could, apologising every time you flinched before finally asking if you thought you could walk, to which you promptly shook your head no. It didn’t go unnoticed by you the large smirk that he had on his face at hearing that his plan worked.
Your handsome boyfriend eased your body into his arms, your head laying on his shoulder as he supported your legs and back, carrying you back into the main area of the flat and onto the bed, neither of you particularly caring that you were still damp from the shower. Sighing in relief at finally being on a soft surface, Marc wrapped a spare blanket over your cold body, kissing your hairline delicately.
“I’ll be back in a moment sweetheart, I’ll order us some food, my smart girl”.
You must have fallen asleep because, by the time you had woken up, the smell of food was filling the apartment, your stomach making a loud growl at the realisation that food was here. Sitting up in bed, you blinked away the sleep in your eyes, groaning at the ache in your muscle from the evening's activities. The food smelt amazing however so ignoring the pain, you climbed out of bed, keeping the blanket around your naked body and glanced across the room into the kitchen, expecting to see Marc unboxing whatever food he had decided upon ordering but instead, he was hunched over the stove, cooking something.
Frowning you tried to clear the fog in your head to make sense of it. Marc couldn’t cook anything except toast (only on a good day), there was no way he’d be able to cook whatever you were smelling right now, and as for Steven, you’d be lucky to get a plain slide of bread without it being wrong in some kind of way. So it wasn’t Marc and it definitely wasn’t Steven that you were watching cook.
It was an almost immediate reaction, your whole body felt warm and safe. It wasn’t that Marc and Steve didn’t make you feel safe, of course, they did but with Jake, his unhinged personality meant that he would do anything and everything to keep you safe, it was a different type of protection compared to the other two. It was also not very often that you get to see all three alters in one day.
Biting your lip in anticipation, you stepped forward, “Papi?” His head flicked towards you immediately, moving the food off the heat so he could approach you.
His footsteps were heavy as he walked closer, his arms out, ready for your next move which was to drop the blanket and jump into his arms, legs circling his waist and arms holding tightly to his shoulders as his strong arms held onto your naked body.
“Mi Amor” he mumbled against your neck, kissing the skin lightly as he held you close. You hadn’t seen Jake in weeks, particularly with all the stress that you had been through with the ending of university, he hated seeing you anxious. Unless there was someone else to hurt if they had caused the anxiety, he usually stayed away, hating to see love upset, it slowly sends him into an unbalanced state that no one particularly needed to deal with.
“I’ve missed you”, pulling away from his shoulder, you looked into his brown eyes that looked nearly black whenever Jake was fronting.
“I missed you too, cariño,” his voice was deep and laced with his beautiful Spanish accent that made your heart flutter. “My beautiful, intelligent girl”. Your cheeks warmed due to his compliments as he lowered you back to the floor, his hands cupping the sides of your head, tilting your face up to his so he could kiss your forehead tenderly, then lower to your lips. You wanted desperately to whine at the loss of contact but you didn’t want to ruin this calm Jake that you had not seen in a while, recently whenever he had fronted, it would be after a mission with Konshu and he would have a lot of pent up frustration and tension, leading to hours of you begging for him to allow you to cum, so seeing him calm wasn’t something you were used too.
Kissing your forehead one more time, he nodded in the direction of the table that still had your laptop on from earlier with the best email you had ever received. “Go and take a seat, the food is nearly ready, and take this, you’ll catch a cold, mi amor”, Jake then proceeded to remove his shirt, handing the warm material to you. Quickly pulling it over your head, you took a second to openly ogle at his body, even though you knew his body like the back of your hand, it still managed to get you all hot and bothered.
Jake chuckled deeply to himself, a single finger pushed under your chin, lifting your eyes from his chest up to his eyes, “later mi amor, now, go and take a seat”. You did as instructed, trying to ignore the evidence of arousal that was moistening your core, his shirt the only thing covering up the glistening wet that was slowly spreading over your thighs as you took a seat and tried not to move too much otherwise he would hear the squeak of your wet cunt against the leather chair.
He joined you soon after at the table, carrying two plates filled with delicious food that had your mouth watering, Jake was such a fantastic cook. As you moved to pick up a fork, Jake swatted your hand away lightly, “allow me” he demanded softly so you sat, hands clutching the edge of his shirt whilst he fed you.
He was able to feed both you and himself and with every bite you held strong eye contact with him, thanking him for every drop of food that you swallowed until he was scraping his and your plate clean. Pushing them to the other side of the table, he sat back in his chair, legs spread as he looked your head to two, making you squirm at the intense stare.
“Just taking the opportunities whilst I can”. You frowned at his words, not quite understanding what he meant.
“What opportunities?”
“To do things for you, there won't be much opportunity as you won’t need me for much longer now will you.”
The room suddenly felt small and suffocating as your throat closed shut, it felt like your world was crumbling.
“What?” was all you could whisper, barely audible as you tried not to cry, watching as Jake sat forward in his seat, forearms leaning against the table.
“Well now, you’re a big independent girl, you’ve passed your university degree, what else would you need me for, right?” You realised now that he was joking but you still felt on edge. “I mean, my smart Princesa, you’ve done this all by yourself, you won’t need me anymore”.
“I’ll… I’ll always need you Jake”, he gave you a pointed look so you quickly corrected yourself, “Papi, I’ll always need you”.
He didn’t respond immediately, still taking his time looking up and down your body until it looked like he had decided upon something. Lifting to fingers, he bent them, signalling for you to come to him which you did without needing to be told twice. Jake sat back in the chair, opening his arms for you to sit comfortably in his lap but before you fully sat, he twirled with his hand so you turned your back to him, sitting down in his lap, your head leaning back against his shoulder.
“Now I want you to do something for me, look at that right there” he pointed to the seat you were just in. At first, you looked on, confused about what exactly you were supposed to be looking at but then you spotted it and your cheeks burned hot. On the leather seat, the evidence of your juicy cunt hadn’t dried, even though you had tried not to drip onto the seat.
“Did my amigos not take good enough care of you today Princesa?” You were so embarrassed, it wasn’t normal for your body to still be craving someone's touch when you’d already been pounded multiple times and orgasmed multiple times, yet here you were, nipples peaked, clit throbbing uncomfortably, internally begging that he would touch you.
“Well? Did they?”
“The-they did Papi, I just..always want you, I’ve missed you so much-” your words were cut off as his large hand encircled around your throat squeezing slightly. The other hand moved to ease each of your thighs on either side of his so once he spread his legs further, your legs widened, causing the shirt you were wearing to rise, exposing your wet, marginally swollen cunt to him.
Your breathing quickened as you watched his hand move towards the area you wanted him to touch so desperately. Jake noticed your breathing and not wanting to overwhelm you, shifted the hand up your neck until his index finger could slip into your mouth. Almost instantly you were sucking on it, the action helping to distract and calm you, the muscles all over your body relaxing as you melted back into his hard body.
Your body still jolted however as he rubbed two fingers up and down your folds, coating himself in your arousal before lifting them in front of both of your faces, displaying it. “See, this would say otherwise” he then lifted the fingers to his mouth, sucking them, moaning at the taste before lowering it, testing to see just how much you could take with him. First, he tried to circle your clit with his finger but you hissed at the touch, almost biting down on his finger in your mouth, before he moved lower to your cunt, pushing in slowly and you could feel how oversensitive your walls were and how you were slightly swollen from the action you’d received earlier as his one finger felt like the same thickness as his cock at that moment.
Jake didn’t say anything at first, simply humming as he removed his digit, once again licking it clean before kissing the side of your head, his favourite way to show that you were safe with him and that he’d look after you.
“Now, how am I going to praise you for doing such incredible work with finishing university if you can hardly even take my finger, mi amor.” You huffed in frustration, the building tension was becoming nearly unbearable, even though it was uncomfortable, the pleasure was slowly starting to outweigh the pain. Sex with Jake was usually quite rough anyway so it was nothing that you hadn’t dealt with before.
“I can take it” you mumbled around his finger, reaching across to his other hand, trying to drag it back to your sopping cunt but he kept it still, not giving in to your demands. Instead, he stood, pulling you up with him, arm around your waist as he walked you to the bed, hand tugging on the shirt you worse until your arms shot up, allowing him to pull it off of you, before pushing on your chest so that you collapsed into the centre of the bed.
Looking up at him, you tried not to show how much he intimate you as he began to take off the remainder of his clothes and then crawled to join you, the evidence of his own excitement standing proud in between his legs until he was lying next to you.
“Turn over” he instructed, which you swiftly followed, lying on your side with your back to him, the warmth of his chest had you nuzzling back as his lips delicately kissed your bare shoulder. “You still think you can take me?” he asked, lifting up your leg and resting it onto of his, the feeling of his cock prodding at your inner thigh had you whimpering for more.
“Yes Papi, I can take it”, his only response to your words were him pinching your nipple harshly, tugging it away from your body and then letting it snap back as he released it. Your hips moved at the sensation, the pleasure once again pooling in your cunt entrance. “Need you…”
“You need me? But I thought you were a smart independent girl who doesn’t need me anymore?” you teased, his teeth now grazing your neck, hard enough that you were sure there would be indents in your skin. You could feel yourself feeling more and more subby as the seconds ticked by, your brain fuzzy with the need to be stimulated and Jake once again just laughed at how desperate you were becoming, he always loved to tease and push you to your limits.
Knowing that you’d start crying soon if he didn’t fuck you, he shifted his hips up, his tip finally pushing into your warm, wet folds, finding your aching hole and penetrating within. The sensation took your breath away, you felt so tight even Jake had to stop for a moment as he slide all the way in, otherwise, he would have cum before it had even begun.
His fingers still played with your nipples but as he started to pull out, he moved to grip your throat, the pressure was welcoming, not enough to fully cut off oxygen completely, but enough that you had to concentrate on how you breathed. Lifting your own hands, you gripped onto his wrist, much as you had with Marc.
This position felt intimate, he felt like he was all over you as he cursed in Spanish, his lips right next to your ear as he pushed his cock back into you, it being slightly easier than the first time. You’d never felt this overstimulated before, the mixture of pain and pleasure was blissful and you were worried that you were already only on the verge of cuming with all of the teasings that he’d done.
His pace was unusually slow, but you were thankful, not wanting to have too much stimulation at once but suddenly he snapped his hips up harshly, his cock fucking straight into your g-spot, your cunt clenching like a vice as the recognisable sensation of tightening in your core already overwhelmed you.
“Wait- wait I’m going to cum Papi, wait-” his thrusts didn’t stop, they were still slow but were harsh and you felt the rumble of his chest on your back as he growled in your ear.
“Then cum, mi Amor, cum my clever Princesa”. Your vision nearly turned blank as you hadn’t expected him to give you permission, it was almost an instant reaction as you came, the throbbing contractions fluttering around his cock as your nails dug into his wrist harshly, unable to mentally process what had even happened for a few seconds.
Jake had stopped moving to give you time to recover, another thing that he never usually did, sensing your confusion, he nipped your ear and murmured, “don’t expect this to be a regular occurrence, I’m only being nice because of how proud I am of you today. Do you need to use your safe words?”
You wanted to shake your head, thinking you couldn’t possibly talk but you knew he would get angry if you didn’t use your words so as he removed his hand from your throat you smiled, mumbling, “green Papi”.
Jake pulled his cock out of you, rolling you onto your front and pulling up your hips until you were on your knees, your face laid out on the bed, you were too lazy to try and push yourself up but this was the exact position that Jake wanted you in as he reached forward, pulling each of your arms until he held them behind your back, your neck now straining for the lack of support but any thought of discomfort flew out of the window as he fucked back into you.
You screamed out, not caring who heard as the bed started to shake against Steven’s book cake, Jake wasn’t holding back now. He grunted with each stroke, your cunt gripping him tightly like a glove as he watched himself disappear inside of you. The grip on your hands allowed him to pull you back onto his cock as you repeatedly moaned out Papi.
After all the pleasure you’d had all day, you didn’t think it was possible for you to cum again, having lost count of how many orgasms you’d even had that day but sure enough, as Jake moved to kneel on one knee behind you, the change in movements causing his cock to tip up the slightest bit, he now was just pounding into your poor sensitive g-spot.
“Ah- Papi, I need…to…cum” you shouted, eyes rolling back at the overwhelming sensations, not even listening to whether you had permission or not as euphoria rushed through every inch of your body once more, your toes curling, small drips of squirt dripping onto the sheets below. Jake pulled out, letting go of your arms and you all but collapsed onto the bed, exhausted, body shaking from the day's events.
“See, this is why I make you wait to cum, you’ll just tire yourself out if I let you cum whenever you want, for a smart girl you really are dumb sometimes.” Jake teased, satisfied with how thoroughly fucked you looked.
Glancing over your shoulder tiredly, you looked at his still-hard cock, then up to his beautiful face. “I still want you to cum in me, Papi.”
Jake bit his lip, contemplating your words, hand brushing down your spine, “you know… any other day I would be already fucking you into the mattress but I think you’ve had enough today”.
You frowned at his words, having never heard him actually say no to fucking you before, usually he would continue until you were crying with being overstimulated or floating in subspace. “But..but I can take it, I promise Papi” you tried to wiggle your arse to show him you were still up for it but your whole body felt like jelly so it didn’t move much. “Please!”
Jake glanced away for a moment like he was thinking through the consequences if he continued to stop until finally, he looked back, gripping your cheeks to show the seriousness of his words. “If you started to feel only pain and no pleasure, you tell me immediately do you understand?” he was using his dom tone of voice, one that you wanted to cower away from but instead you simply responded with a simple “yes”.
“Good. And the next time you cum, it will be the final time, as much as I love feeling your beautiful cunt pulsing around my dick, I already know you’re going to be feeling a bit spacey with the next one so we will be stopping and doing aftercare, whether I’ve cum or not, do you understand mi amor?”
“Yes, Papi.” Swallowing harshly at his seriousness, you also could feel the anticipation for him filling you back up again, even though everything felt overly sensitive, you couldn’t wait, the only issue was that your legs were so weak you could kneel back into position so Jake helped you to lift your hips and slide a pillow beneath you, helping your cunt to arch up but still being comfortable for you.
He straddled your legs, hands clenching your arse cheeks, prying them apart so he could look at your core, whispering about its beauty before finally he inched his veiny thick cock back inside of you. All the energy in your body had disappeared so that you couldn’t even grip the sheets, only instead being able to moan out his name repeatedly, as his hips snapped into yours.
This position also allowed him to hit deeper spots inside your cunt, each movement was like a spark of pure pleasure that had you on a constant high. Jake moaned at the sight beneath him, knowing that he was close, he picked up the pace, knowing it needed to be now or never as your eyebrows bunched together, mouth opening in a silent O, just a few more deep, heavy thrusts and his milky cum was coating your walls, just as you also shivered and clenched around him in orgasm but this one was different.
Through the multitude that you’d had that day, all your energy was burnt so you simply shivered and dribbled into the sheets, Jake even though for a moment you’d passed out but you still responded when he called out your name.
Not that you were aware of it, but Jake moved off of the bed, returning only once he had two wash clothes in his hand, one to clean you up with, which you didn’t even flinch at, whilst the other he simply placed it over your cunt as something to ease the pain and swelling.
Finally, he pulled on some underwear, picked up the discarded blanket from the table and moved back into bed, shifting your dead weight up until he was beneath you, your body lying over his chest as he covered you both with the blanket.
Stroking back the sweaty hair out of your face, Jake kissed your forehead one last time for that night, whispering, “well done my clever girl.”
#moon knight smut#moon knight one shot#moon knight fic#moon knight#steven grant one shot#steven grant smut#steven grant fic#steven grant x reader#marc spector smut#marc spector#marc spector x reader#steven grant#jake lockley smut#jake lockley x reader#jake lockley#mine*#request
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how to motivate yourself to restart your manifestation journey and really persist time after countless of tries over the years, where you always gave up and now feel a lack of energy to try once again? even though you still believe in the law and your heart still aches for your dream life. sorry if this is too dramatic, i'm going through it lol btw thanks for deciding to start this blog, i love your personality!
AYO ANON! [Sorry this is a bit long *sighs*]
First of all, take a good break. Listen to music to unwind or simply do things that make you feel good. You actually don't need a break in order to get back on track, but it feels like you actually need some time for yourself SO RELAX AND CHILL BESTIE. PRIORTIZE YOURSELF.
I can understand how you feel now. Even I had gone through the same phase of doubting myself and the law and getting super-frustrated because I THOUGHT that I wasn't able to manifest anything.
What you need to do is:
GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER. LIKE REALLY.
Its alright if you feel pressurized or stressed right now, or if you feel like crying your heart out. ACTUALLY, YOU SHOULD DO THAT. LET OUT YOUR EMOTIONS. IT IS A FACT THAT YOUR EMOTIONS CAN'T AFFECT OR CHANGE YOUR MANIFESTATION. SO take some time off from tumblr and stuff and recharge yourself.
IF YOU ASSUME YOU'RE DOING SOMETHING WRONG, THEN YOU WON'T BE ABLE TO MANIFEST.
ASSUMING = THINKING = MANIFESTING
STOP THINKING YOU'RE DOING SOMETHING WRONG. STOP THINKING NOTHING IS HAPPENING IN YOUR FAVOR. STOP THINKING YOU'RE NOT GETTING YOUR RESULTS.
STOP. THINKING. DUMB. SHIT.
LET GO OF YOUR OLD STORY. WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU WANNA THINK ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED IN THE PAST? WHO GIVES A FUCK ABOUT THE PAST? FORGET YOUR PAST. STOP GIVING IMPORTANCE TO YOUR PAST.
Your past = Old story.
OLD story. WHO THE HELL GIVES A FUCK ABOUT THE OLD STORY?
Bestie point number one, STOP THINKING ABOUT THE PAST.
Point number two : SELF-CONCEPT
WORK ON YOUR SELF-CONCEPT. I KNOW IT MIGHT BE A LITTLE DIFFICULT AT THE START, BUT TRUST ME THIS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING EVER. LIKE LITERALLY.
IT SEEMS LIKE THE PAST YOU WAS A LITTLE INSECURE AND DOUBTFUL. LET GO OF YOUR PAST SELF.
START THINKING:
I HAVE EVERYTHING I WANT BECAUSE I'M THE FUCKING GOD OF THIS WORLD.
I NEVER GET ANY INTRUSIVE THOUGHTS. I LITERALLY HAVE ZERO LIMITING BELIEFS.
I BELIEVE IN MYSELF BECAUSE I'M THE GOD OF MY REALITY.
LITERALLY NOTHING CAN STOP ME FROM GETTING WHAT I WANT.
THE ONLY LIMIT IS YOUR MIND. ONCE YOUR MINDSET IS SET ON WHAT YOU WANT, NOTHING CAN STOP YOU. FUCK THOSE LIMITING BELIEFS, YOU CREATE YOUR LIFE.
Point number three bestie: THE FUCKING 3D.
YOU KEEP ON CHECKING RESULTS. KEEP ON CHECKING FOR SIGNS THAT YOUR MANIFESTATION IS COMING.
Bestie-
WHY THE FUCK YOU WANNA DO THAT?
" Because I'm not sure that I'm actually manifesting-
CHANGE. YOUR. FUCKING. THOUGHTS.
THE 3D IS MY BITCH.
THE 3D ALWAYS CONFORMS INSTANTLY NO MATTER WHAT.
I CONTROL THE 3D BECAUSE I'M GOD BRUH.
WHY DO I ALWAYS MANIFEST INSTANTLY?
ETC. ETC. ETC.
YOU control the 3D. The 3D doesn't control YOU. REMEMBER YOU HAVE THE POWER.
Last thing.
PERSISTING = JUST THINKING POSITIVE LITERALLY.
PERSISTING IS AFFIRMING FIRMLY NO MATTER WHAT THE 3D SHOWS YOU.
KEEP ON REPEATING AND REPEATING AND REPEATING AND REPEATING.
PERSISTING IS LITERALLY THAT EASY.
BESTIE, YOU'RE GOD. YOU ALWAYS GET EVERYTHING YOU WANT. NOTHING SHOULD CHANGE YOUR THOUGHTS. NOTHING.
MAKE YOUR MIND STRONG. MAKE YOUR THOUGHTS IMPOSSIBLE TO CHANGE.
YOUR MANIFESTATION CANNOT FAIL. YOU MAY GET IT A LITTLE LATE OR A LITTLE EARLY THAN EXPECTED BUT IT CANNOT FAIL.
YOU'RE ALWAYS MANIFESTING = THINKING. YOU LITERALLY THOUGHT "I DIDN'T GET MY DESIRE" SO YOU DIDN'T GET IT.
CHANGE. YOUR. MINDSET.
BESTIE PLEASE STAY FIRM.
HOW BAD DO YOU WANT YOUR DESIRES FULFILLED?
THINK OF THAT AND MANIFEST.
I'M PROUD OF YOU THAT YOU STILL HAVE THE STRENGTH TO KEEP MANIFESTING. MOST PEOPLE JUST GIVE UP WHEN THEY ARE ABOUT TO GET THEIR DESIRES AND TOSS THE LAW ASIDE.
You can simply start thinking:
I don't judge myself for my mistakes. I never give up. I am going to succeed because I SAID SO BECAUSE I'M GOD.
I'M AMAZING. I'M HARDWORKING. I'M PERFECT.
I'M ALWAYS TRYING MY LEVEL BEST. THERE'S NO NEED FOR ME TO BE SO HARD ON MYSELF.
STOP WASTING YOUR TIME REGRETTING AND DOUBTING AND START MANIFESTING BESTIE. GET BACK ON TRACK.
IF YOU'RE TIRED, take REST but don't STOP.
YOU'VE FUCKING GOT THIS YOU BEAUTIFUL PIECE OF SHIT.
REMEMBER YOU'RE DOING NOTHING WRONG.
NOTHING CAN STOP YOU FROM GETTING WHAT YOU WANT BECAUSE YOU'RE A BOSS BITCH.
MANIFESTING IS EXTREMELY EASY FOR YOU AND YOU ALWAYS SUCCEED YOU POWERFUL MOTHERFUCKER.
YOU. CAN. DO. THIS.
GET YOUR FUCKING DREAM LIFE AND MAKE THOSE BITCHES JEALOUS.
GET YOUR DESIRES RIGHT NOW. [Hang on you've already got them *smirks*]
I LOVE YOU, YOU FUCKING DRAMATIC BITCH!
LETS GOOOOOOO!
Love, Moon.
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For MK prompts: THE BOYS TAKING CARE OF Y/N!! 😫🤌 Like!! Maybe Y/n is really good at hiding their feelings, right? So the boys don’t realize how stressed out they are until they have a mental breakdown over something small. It could turn into smut…,, if you want 😏
moon system x reader ≈ 5.1k words masterlist here
i got carried away with 5k+ words.
hope y’all enjoy!!! i loved writing it lol
also might make a kind of part 2 where khonshu makes it up to y/n 😗
TW FOR: oral sex (f&m recieving, more f than m), PiV sex, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it, obv), threat of being fired, khonshu being kind of an ass, emotional constipation from reader
This fic is NSFW, mature audiences only. Please continue at your own risk. You are responsible for your own media consumption.
—
As usual, everything started with work. Your editor had pretty much told you that this story was useless, and that you needed to get something together within the week- meaning the next day- or your job could be in jeopardy. You’d been working for The Sun for two years now, ever since you moved to London from the US, so losing this job would probably set back years of your progress in the field. You went back to your desk and immediately set to finding something else to write.
The next day, you had returned with a draft about a shooting during a protest, and set it triumphantly upon your editor’s desk. Metaphorically. You actually emailed it to her at 4 am, after having spent 5-9 curled up with Steven, lying about your day and pretending you were fine, before untangling yourself after he fell asleep to sit at your desk and work. And work. And work. And then cook breakfast for yourself and your boys, because you had 30 minutes until you had to get ready for work.
Across the loft, your alarm went off, waking the whole apartment and sending you scurrying across the room to shut it off. Steven awoke with a grunt, grabbing your waist, pulling you down next to him, and peppering your neck and shoulders with light kisses. “Good morning, love.” A pause, another kiss. “Why weren’t you in bed?”
You hummed, your eyes trying to fight the two liters of coffee you’d drank that night, before huffing quietly and lying through your teeth. “I wanted to surprise you.” You turn in his arms and peck his nose. “Breakfast?”
He buries his face in your neck and grins against your collarbone. “Whatever did I do to deserve you?”
After the two of you ate your waffles, Marc and Jake both fronted to kiss you goodbye- resulting in you almost missing the bus- before you headed off to work. Your editor decided to wait until the end of the day to call you in, of course. She told you that the article was fine- just fine- but that due to the delay, you’d be doing stocks for the next two weeks.
You headed home again, tired beyond belief and missing your boys, and missed the bus. You missed the goddamn bus. Picking up your phone, you collected yourself and called your system. Jake picked up. “Hey, hon. What are you up to?”
“Dropping someone off, why?” A mumble in the background and the sound of paper comes through the speaker on your phone.
“Oh, I missed the bus. I wondered if maybe you could come pick me up?” You winced slightly as you asked, you wanted nothing less than to be a hindrance to any of your loved ones.
He huffed through his nose. “I’d love to, mi amor.” The dull roar of Jake’s engine fills your speaker. “Are you at the bus stop outside your work?”
“Yeah, I am.”
“Alright, can you wait for 10, cariño?”
“Mhm, thank you, Jakey.” You both laughed at the nickname before saying your goodbyes and hanging up. You plopped down onto the cold metal bench and put your head in your hands. At least it was Friday evening. After a few minutes, you pulled your head up, straightened your face, and prepared yourself to spend the night with Jake and maybe the other two.
Jake pulled up in his cab moments later, rolling down the window, and wolf-whistling at you like he was just any other cheap cabbie. “Hey, pretty lady. ¿Tienes un lugar para estar?” He shouted, looking you up and down. You opened the door and slid in, placing your hand on his thigh and leaning up to him and looking him up and down sensually.
“I have absolutely no idea what you just said, but you’re pretty and I want you to take me home.” You grinned at him, smacking a big kiss straight on his lips and removing your hand from his leg.
He caught it right back and placed it on his knee, rolling the window up and driving away.
When you arrived at your apartment, you withdrew your hand and you both clambered out of the car and up the elevator to your flat.
Jake wrapped his arms around you from behind as soon as you walked in your door, kissing your neck and slipping his hands into your belt loops. “Mi amor, I’ve missed you. It’s been so long since I’ve been out with you.” He sucked a small spot on your neck, making you flip around to face him.
“I missed you, too, honey,” you muttered against his lips.
He smiled gently, looking cross-eyed at you as he pulled you closer to him by your waist. “You’re so pretty, sweetheart.”
“Mm, you’re prettier, darling.” You whispered almost conspiratorially before shutting your eyes and kissing him softly. His eyelashes fluttered against your cheeks as his tongue dipped into your mouth. Your teeth clicked gently against one another, and a small huff of laughter came from both of you. After a moment, you came back together and picked up the same pace. The kiss changed from sweet and slow to fast and wanting over the course of a few minutes. His tongue tangled with yours, the mixed sounds of heavy breathing and spit filling the room.
You pulled back for a breath, and smiled toothily at him. Pausing for a second, you grabbed him by the top of his button up, undoing it, and pulled him towards the bed.
Jake’s returning smile was filled with joy and mischief, the beginnings of desire filling his eyes as the two of you fell gracelessly onto the bed. You pushed him back so his head was on the pillow, moving so your thighs were on either side of the middle of his torso. His hands came to rest upon your waist before you grabbed them, setting them on the headboard with a quiet-but-firm instruction not to move them. You watched as he grabbed the bars solidly and a flame lit in his eyes.
“I’ve missed you so much, my love. You’re always so much fun to play with, aren’t you?”
His lips tilted to one side and his mouth opened in a crooked smile. “Only because you treat me so well, mi amor.”
“Mmm, and you do so well for me.” You hummed down to him, backing up so his crotch was under your heat. He was rock solid against you, you took a mental note that it had to be painful. “Except for when you don’t.”
“The fight is half the fun, cariño,” he groaned, trying to grind up into you. You tsked quietly and leaned down to speak against his lips, pulling your hips away from his in the process. He let out a high-pitched noise, falling out of that strong character he always tried to hold.
“You won’t be saying that when I’m done with you tonight. You won’t be saying anything, you’ll be so pussy-drunk on me.” You giggled against him, biting his lower lip when he let out a tortured groan. He muttered a few swears in Spanish and a few in English, then, “Me vas a mutar, mujer.” A phrase he’d uttered enough that you’d learned the meaning ages ago.
“I will not, but if i did, you’d savor every minute of it.”
“Si,” he groaned, nuzzling your face with his nose.
“How would you want to go?”
“Between your thighs.” He answered quickly, almost eagerly.
You hummed in response, lifting yourself up and placing a hand on the bed-frame. His eyes widened in surprise, hands white-knuckling the bars they were wrapped around obediently. “You know the rules, yes?”
“Yes. No touching anything other than your pussy, no touching myself, and hips stay on the bed. A pinch to your thigh if I need to tap out or speak.” He recited the rules diligently.
“Good boy,” you cooed, ruffling his hair. “Now Jakey, I won’t kill you, but you’re not getting out of this easily. You don’t get to come until I’ve come six times, however long that takes. You can switch out with the other boys, but six times between the three of you. Understood?”
“Yes, mi amor.” And with that, you used the headboard and his chest to position yourself directly above his mouth. He eagerly tilted his head up as you set yourself down fully on his face, tongue flicking against your clit with such desperation, such force, that you were approaching the edge rapidly within a minute or two. His tongue kept working you, pushing occasionally into your entrance to collect your juices. You catapulted over that edge soon after with a loud moan, the stress of your day leaving you entirely. He slowed momentarily to work you through that orgasm as you ground down onto his face. His tongue dipped into you, lapping up the remnants as your pussy throbbed slowly. His nose continued to nudge your clit, working you back up. His hand moved from the bar, lightly pinching your thigh to make you sit up on your knees.
His face was utterly wrecked. His nose to his chin was covered in you, and his eyes were shuttered and blown wide with lust. He licked his lips and cleared his throat. “Marc wants a turn, then Steven. I’ll be back after them, of course, mi amor.”
“Good boy, see you in a minute.” You watched as his eyes rolled back a bit with disassociation, then another man was beneath you entirely.
Marc grinned wickedly, picking you up and flipping the two of you. “I think our dear Jake thought I’d be staying beneath you, don’t you?” He settled himself between your thighs and placed your legs over his shoulders, your fingers twining into his hair. “I like this position better- I can see your face when I make you cum for me.”
You sucked your lower lip into your mouth, recovering from the whiplash of the change in position and dynamic, but definitely not complaining. His smile disappeared between your thighs, but you could still see the lines it created beside his eyes when his tongue dipped back inside you. He swirled it around, hitting your g-spot, before pulling it back out and attacking your clit with no regrets. His hands kneaded your ass, pulling on the soft material as his groans vibrated inside of your core.
You were getting close, the shockwaves starting to make your thighs shake, when suddenly he pulled away. You whined, tugging lightly on his hair. “Marc,” you draw out his name, twisting the syllable on your tongue like taffy, “make me cum.” You said the words harshly and forcefully. A demand, not a request. You felt his devious smile against your inner thighs as he left tiny little splotches all along them, marking you up for the other boys achingly slowly.
“Gladly,” he finally said against your pussy. Immediately, his fingers dipped into you, curling hard against that one spot, and his tongue started rolling your clit in its hood so much faster than before. Frantically, your fingers dug into his hair and the tension between your legs was just getting tighter and tighter until so quickly, you exploded. Your juices ran down his fingers as he kept pumping them into you, suckling lightly on your clit as you pulsed around them.
“Bye-bye, baby. Steven can’t wait much longer. Love you.” You echoed as Marc pushed himself up off the bed and hovered over you, kissing you lightly on the lips before kneeling on the end of the bed and going slightly limp for a moment, allowing Steven to front.
Steven’s demeanor was slightly nervous, very caring, and incredibly eager. His eyes roved hungrily over your body, pausing on your peaked breasts and then between your still-spread legs for a long moment. You prepared yourself to be dominant again- Steven had always been the most submissive of the three of them, easily. You collected your bearings and knelt in front of him on the bed, grabbing him by the chin with two fingers.
His eyes dropped to his lap as a deep blush colored his cheeks, then raised and met yours reluctantly. “Strip, then get on the floor,” you said quietly. He scrambled off the bed, quickly removing all of his clothing before kneeling on the floor and watching intently while you perched yourself on the very edge of the mattress, hips jutted out for him. “Hands on my hips.” He obeyed, scooting closer and looking up at you for confirmation that he was doing the right thing.
“Good boy,” you hum, reaching out and running your fingers through his curly hair. You saw his shoulder loosen up a bit and his eyes drop back down hungrily. “Now eat me out.” He dove in as soon as you let him, clearly wanting to taste you for himself after having been in the back seat while the other two had their turns. He moaned against you, his tongue sloppier and less methodical than his alters’. Somehow, it worked just as well. His tongue flipped between diving deep into you, curling in just the right spot, and drawing heavy circles around your clit, all while making the loudest, most gorgeous vibrations against you. So fast, you felt your walls clenching harder and the chills becoming more intense. “Use your hands,” you shouted, lost in the bliss of his mouth.
One of his hands zipped straight from your hip to your pussy, immediately putting three fingers into you and curling faster than ever before. You screamed his name, using his hair to push his face between your thighs as you came. His tongue continued working your clit, his fingers now just sliding in and out of you. After a moment of come-down, you laughed under your breath, pulling his head away. He looked up at you with big eyes, waiting for you to say something.
“You did so good, Stevie. Thank you.” You pulled him up to you, seeing him loosen slightly.
“Love you, dear, and I so thoroughly enjoyed that, but Jake is going to kill me if I don’t give him back the body.” He pecked you lightly on the lips and laid down on the bed, back in the last position Jake had the body in, and shut his eyes.
You repositioned yourself over his face, so that as soon as he awoke, you dropped down onto his face and started to grind your hips down on him again.
With a few kitten licks to your clit, he dropped one hand from the bars to plunge a single finger into you, curling it into you a few times before adding two more. His tongue resumed its flicking on your bud, making you shout his name for likely the entire apartment building to hear, occasionally dropping back down to your hole to collect the slick dripping down his wrist.
He moaned helplessly against you as another rush of moisture gushed from you onto his lips and hand, slurping noises filling the apartment mixed with your cries.
Your lower abdomen began to tighten up, the pressure ratcheting higher and higher until-
His mouth had stopped. His eyes were pointed to the left side of the room. After a moment, he pinched your thigh lightly, kissing the inside of it.
“I’m sorry.”
“Jake, what the hell?”
“It’s Khonshu. He has a job for me.”
You puffed out your nose, shaking your head. “It’s fine.” You sat back, setting your mouth over his now naked, weeping cock. “Khonshu, you can wait. Give me 5 minutes. Stay and watch the show if you’d like.” You gave that side of the room a crooked smile before turning it to the man lying beneath you. Grabbing his cock with one hand, you suddenly dropped your mouth onto him, feeling it slip into your throat immediately. He groaned, his hands holding so tightly to the bar you thought the skin would rip at the knuckles. You pulled off of him a bit, took a deep breath, and swirled your tongue around the tip of him. It twitched in your mouth, barely nudging your teeth, making a cry of pleasure mixed with pain rip from Jake’s throat. You smiled around him before dropping your head back down around the length of him.
His head dropped back, he moaned loudly, and then he glanced at the mirror.
You saw his eyes go blank, and then Marc’s hands were in your hair, grabbing your throat, and he was groaning like you were the best thing he’d ever had.
“You suck us off so well, baby.” He groaned. “I love you, my girl. We’ll be back safe sometime tomorrow morning, okay?”
You echoed back a muffled version of “Okay, I love you,” the vibrations making his hips roll up off the bed towards you. He tucked some hair behind your ear before his eyes went blank again and a quiet whimper came from his throat.
Steven had his eyes rolled back in his head, his hips thrusting lightly against your mouth. He gulped some air down and looked you in the eyes after a moment. “Sweet- oh- sweetheart, I love you.” He paused to breathe as you wrapped your lips around the tip and sucked. A loud cry ripped the air from his lungs, making him catch his breath again before he said, “I’ll make sure they’re safe, love. You keep yourself safe. I love you so much.”
Again, you repeated his words back to him and pulled back, starting a solid pace with your throat and tongue.
“I’m so close, cariño, please, please,” Jake whined out to you, his dick twitching in your throat. “Mi corazón, te quiero mucho.” You slowed the pace, finally moving your hands to wrap around the base and twist upwards as you suckled on the head. Your tongue flitted across it harshly, and that was the last straw. He burst like a dam, his hips thrusting against your mouth and his cum shooting into your mouth. He cried out your name, struggling to keep his hands up. You swallowed what you could, though some of it fell onto your lips and cheeks.
After a few seconds, you pushed yourself up his body to kiss him on the lips. He then got up and walked to the small bathroom to grab a damp hand towel.
He swiped gently across your face and between your legs with the cloth. “I’m so sorry that we have to leave. I never want to leave you. Neither do Marc or Steven. I’ll be back tomorrow.” He kissed you lightly.
“I love you very much, too, Jake. I trust you, I know you don’t want to leave. I don’t blame you, it’s alright. I’ll see you tomorrow. Safe and sound, right?” You said with a smile as you shoved down the disappointment.
“Yes, querida, safe and sound.” He kissed you one last time before dressing and walking out the door, presumably following or trailed by Khonshu, the god who constantly took your boys away from you and put them in harm’s way.
You knew you wouldn’t get any sleep unless you just committed to it now, so you rested your head on the pillow and pushed any thoughts of danger from your mind.
—
The next morning, you woke to a cold bed. As expected. You wished that your system were beside you, or maybe on top of you, cuddling you and keeping you warm. You shoved out of bed, ignoring the painful twinge between your thighs. You started to make your bed, but noticed that the sheets and pillowcases were dirty. Laundry day, you supposed.
You started by yanking off the pillowcases and throwing the pillows onto a nearby chair. Then you added the blankets to the pile, and then the sheets. You loaded it all into a hamper, brought an empty one to the laundry room, loaded all of the clean laundry into it, took it to your room, and dumped it onto the mattress.
You stared at the laundry, unfolded and chaotic on your bed, for what must have been 10 minutes. You didn’t want to do this. You didn’t have the energy for this. Your job was tiring and painful. You missed your boys. This was too much. It was all too much.
You laid down on top of the clean laundry, your head at an uncomfortable angle to the rest of your body, and started to cry. Loudly weeping, with little words thrown in there. “I can’t do this anymore,” or “It’s all too much.”
Eventually, you heard the door to your apartment crack open. Your head flicked quickly to the offending noise, your temples throbbing with the quick motion and your eyes struggling to adjust. Quick steps approached you, and Marc’s accent struck you in the dead silence.
“Y/N? What’s going on?” His voice was laced with fear and apprehension, shaking slightly at the edges.
You groaned, wiping your eyes and sitting up. “Nothing. I was being silly.”
Marc frowned. “That’s not true. Would you rather speak to Steven?”
You shook your head fiercely. “No, you’re as good as Steven is.” Marc often thought that he wasn’t good enough to deal with emotions. “I just don’t… I don’t talk about these things. They just happen, I leave them in my past, and they happen again.” You swallow the lump in your throat.
Marc sighed, perching himself on the pile of laundry right beside you. “That’s what I do too. But you always take care of me. Let me repay the favor?” You leaned your head on him, nodding. “What’s going on, baby?”
“I just-” you fought to pull air into your lungs. “Everything’s just too much.” You said quietly.
His brows furrowed. “What do you mean?”
“Work. Jeanine has been a bitch lately. She told me I had a day to get something new in and if I didn’t I was probably gonna lose my job, and I got it in, but now I’m on stocks for two weeks. And then Khonshu- I don’t blame you, never- Khonshu comes in while we’re fucking and takes you away from me. It’s all just piling up.” You looked down at the bed and laughed humorlessly.
“And then the laundry just set you off, hmm?” Marc said thoughtfully. You nodded, still looking at the bed. You felt foolish. Marc took your hand in one of his and pinched your chin in his other hand. “Look, Y/N, you don’t need to hide with us. I know it feel like you’re overreacting to something or you’re a burden, but you’re not. Not either of those. You are allowed to feel things. You’re allowed to feel negative things. You’re allowed to break down and cry. But I want to be here for you, here with you, when you do.” He sighed, shaking his head. “Because I love you, Y/N. And call me crazy, but my love for you makes me want to be here for you, care for you, when you need someone.” He smiled gently, his hand moving from your chin to your hair. “I can’t turn Khonshu down. I wish I could. But I can make the best of my time while I’m here with you.” His hand released yours to wipe a few tears from your cheeks and wipe them on his jeans. He kissed your lips lightly, resting your foreheads together.
“Thank you.” You croaked. “I just don’t want to be a burden.”
He scoffed against you. “You’re not a burden, baby. Nothing about you is or ever could be burdensome. You’re the love of my life.” He kissed you again. “You will never be a burden on me. Or Jake, or Steven.” He added their names as an afterthought, no doubt after they told him too.
You stood up, pulling him with you, and started on the laundry. He smiled broadly before getting to work next to you. Within 10 minutes, the two of you had, with a little help from the other boys, folded all of the laundry that plagued you. After you put it away, you pecked him on the lips. “Thank you, Marc. You really helped.”
“Always. I will always help.” He set his lips against yours and smiled, shutting his eyes. “I love you.” You echoed his words before pressing your lips into his, your tongue slipping into his mouth. One of his hands wrapped around the back of your head while the other pulled you closer by the waist.
Your lips sped up, his teeth nipping your lower lip lightly every few moments. He pulled you down onto the bed on top of him and rolled the two of you over so he was above you. He slipped his hands under your shirt, massaging your tits. He rolled your nipples between his fingers, a smile pressing against your lips when a groan broke from you. He pulled away from your mouth to pull your shirt over your head. You hadn’t been wearing a bra, so your breasts were now exposed to his eyes and to the air. Your nipples pebbled against the chill, and his head dropped to wrap his lips around one of them. He flicked it roughly with his tongue a few times before switching to the other one and doing the same.
You pulled him up by the hair, your hips grinding up into his as he raised his head up to yours. Your hands twined into his shirt, pulling it over his head and pulling him back down on top of you. His lips met yours again, and you both pulled off your pants and underwear. He bit your lip as he pulled away, slipping down your body to rest between your legs. A light kiss was pressed to the inside of your thigh, then the other. “I’m sorry that we have to leave you sometimes. But I think we can make it up to you, if you’d let us.” He pressed a light kiss to your clit, still looking you in the eyes for confirmation.
You nodded, smiling. “You don’t need to make it up to me, though I appreciate it. Khonshu is the issue, so if he wants to make it up to me, he can.” Marc’s eyes glazed, glancing behind you near the bedpost.
He licked his lips before he said, “He says he’d ‘love to show you how a god eats pussy.’” He paused, seemingly thinking about it. “But right now it's just us. He doesn’t get any piece of you tonight.” His tongue dipped into you and your hands clasped into his hair with a groan. He moved up, his tongue hitting your clit. He moved his jaw, flitting around and somehow hitting everywhere you needed him. You whined, high pitched in your throat, and ground your hips up against his face. He grabbed your hips with one hand, controlling your movements slightly while still allowing them to move.
The two middle fingers from his other hand dipped quickly into your heat, curling against your g-spot with deliberate force. You cried out his name, his teeth hitting your bud gently. “Please, Marc,” you sighed. You were reaching the edge quickly, your core tightening with every motion he made. His fingers slowed to a deep pump. You lifted your hips against his face and the grip you had in his hair tightened. He groaned against you, his jaw working against your heat. “Please,” you whispered.
He hummed quietly, his fingers speeding up once again, before he said, “Come for me, baby. Let it go,” and sucked hard on your clit, two fingers curling hard and fast against your g-spot.
You shrieked into your upper arm, biting it lightly to keep from waking the neighbors as your core clenched down hard around his fingers, your hips bucking up against his mouth. “Oh, please, oh god, Marc…” you muttered meaninglessly. His fingers withdrew and came to your clit to work you through the orgasm while his tongue lapped eagerly at the juices dripping from you. A moan ripped from his throat, half-muffled by your body.”
After a moment, you pulled him away by the hair and back up to your mouth. “Now, you’re gonna fuck me. Because I didn’t get your dick yesterday, thanks to Khonshu.”
“Yes, ma’am,” he grinned, his lips pressing into yours. You lips fought with his, his chapped ones smacking into yours with light pressure. The sound and feeling of your mixed spit made it so you didn’t notice one of his hands dropping to move his cock to you entrance until it was firmly seated there. “You ready for me, baby?”
“Always.” And with that, he pressed into you with a hiss. His size was always a stretch, splitting you open on him every time. He worked it in slowly, rolling his hips in slow motions to let you adjust to the pinch. Within the minute, you had stretched out enough to fit him, so you started rolling your hips against his.
He got the memo and thrusted lightly into you, pulling back just a bit to get some good force. You cried out against his lips and he bit you lightly, huffing with laughter. He rocked his hips into you roughly again, picking up a rhythm. His mouth dropped to your neck and his hand dropped to your clit. He kissed at your pulse point while his hand picked up the same rhythm as his hips, bringing you close to orgasm within a few minutes.
You started rolling your hips against his, meeting his pace. He groaned against your neck, nipping at your collarbone. You felt his cock twitch inside of you, signaling that he was as close as you. A few more swipes of his fingers, and you went careening off the edge, Marc’s lips coming back up to yours to swallow the loud noises you made. Your pussy clenching tight around his dick made him thrust his hips harder into yours, your hips still moving with his from the force of the orgasm. After a few seconds, he hit his climax too, a noise ripping from his throat and spilling into your mouth as he filled you up to the brim. His hips stuttered against yours, base seated against your core as his cum spilled out of you.
You caught your breaths together, sharing oxygen as you pressed small kisses against one another’s lips. “I love you,” you said simply as he withdrew from your body. He hummed with a smile as he went to wet a washcloth, returning with one in hand.
“And I love you,” he replied with a smile on his face, happy to be blessed with the privilege of taking care of you.
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Hello! I Hope you are having a good day! If it's not a bother could I request Bakusquad with a reader who is self conscious about his eyes because his quirk makes them look weird, and always wears sunglasses or tinted goggles but he finally shows them his eyes because he trusts them.
bakusquad with boyfriend who's insecure about his eyes
pairing: bakuquad x male!reader (he/him)
type: fluff, insecurity comfort, mjnor angst
warnings: insecurity...? mild desc of anxiety, cussing, close ups of eyes
author's notes: hhh i kind of took this like the hc of hizashi having spiral eyes and hiding them to not creep people out (but then showing them to aizawa bc erasermic i fucking love them)
also these aren't particularly long? SORRY BOUT THAT LMAO
IMPORTANT BACKGROUND
SO. reader, you can have whatever quirk you please! i can't come up w individual storylines for each individual situation, so your background is the same for them all. you met them when you transferred into the respective middle school, and when you were both accepted into UA, you got closer and closer. you're in 2-A, and have been together for about a year.
one of your parents had a spider quirk, and though you didn't inherit that quirk, you did inherit their multiple eyes. or, well, you were supposed to. but it just didn't work out. you've covered your eyes with sunglasses, goggles. but now...
ALSO YES, GANG ORCA IS YOUR FATHER FIGURE THAT YOU DID YOUR WORK STUDY WITH BECAUSE I LOVE HIM AND I SAID SO SO YEAH
they're also whatever color your natural eyecolor is babes, or you can choose lol
👁️👁️👁️👁️👁️👁️👁️👁️👁️👁️👁️
Katsuki Bakugou
he's never really questioned your use of goggles. quietly in this own head, yes, but he figured it had something to do with your quirk. he did call you Goggles, though. not that you minded it.
you didn't...not trust him. but you were scared. nobody outside of you, your parents, and a few students at the middle school you attended before tranferring had seen your eyes. after the trauma of getting so violently verbally (and slightly physically) battered because of something you couldn't control, you swore to hide behind your goggles as long as possible.
this was going to be hard. and you'd even considered not showing him at all. ever. but you also figured that you couldn't truly hide forever.
it wasn't until your second sports festival that you decided that you were ready. you were paired up to fight todoroki the next round and you knew you couldn't have your goggles on. in training, it was easy to accept the repercussions of blind spots. but after the results of your first sports festival, you weren't going to let your insecurity risk a loss.
so now you were in the prep room, wringing your hands and shifting your weight back and forth from your right to left foot and back. it was all you could do to soothe yourself, but of course when bakugou came in he assumed you were trying to calm the nerves of having to fight todoroki.
"stop stressing yourself out, goggles, we both know you can take candycane out quick." he didn't notice the way you tensed at his presence, or the way your hands started debating whether or not this was a good idea. "remember what the dolphin man said, you're on your way to being the next pro hero, only second to-" of course he was adding some stuff in, but you weren't even really listening.
you had turned so fast that you almost msde yourself sick and pulled the goggles off.
"me..." your boyfriend took a few moments to understand what exactly was going on, but you'd taken it the wrong way and statted scrambling to put your goggles back on.
"shit, sorry. i-uh- i should've-"
"stop stuttering, you sound like deku." he huffed and stepped forward to kiss your forehead. gently. which. katsuki-? "they're not ugly. and you're gonna win that fucking match, understand? icyhot's got nothing on you."
if it weren't for his soft change in tone or the fact that there were no longer goggles obscuring your view, you would've missed the blush on his face. "are my eyes katsuki bakugou's kryptonite?"
"WATCH IT, GOGGLES-"
all you could do was laugh before planting your own kiss on his cheek. "i'll win. i was never nervous about that."
your boyfriend smirked, eyes shining with pride. "good. go show those extras how fucking awesome my boyfriend is." he took another moment to look at your eyes. your eyes. it really is true. love at first sight does exist.
Eijirou Kirishima
you're 100000% not worried about what he'd think about your eyes. he's just so accepting, so loving and kind and never EVER hesitates to embrace you, including your faults.
so no, you're not worried about what he'd think. you're worried that he'll let it slip to someone by accident in the middle of one of his rambles to his friends about how every bit of his boyfriend is perfect, and then others would know and how would they see you? people already demonized your parent for having a spider quirk, and even moreso for their "haunted" eyes, so why shouldn't you be anxious about it?
so you'd kept your mouth shut and your goggles up, even when you two were cuddling or fell asleep with each other. he never pressed, only occasionally asking if you were sure you were comfortable and if you'd like to ask hatsume for a more practical pair.
at some point you, aizawa, and kiri realized that you had to get better goggles, a pair that was made specifically for you. even mr. orca himself let you know that your way of hiding wasn't very practical in battle.
so you agreed with kiri to go to hatsume, but that meant taking your goggles off.
the anxiety was high, and the day you had scheduled to go see hatsume got closer by the hour. you were tense, hands always coming up to your face to secure your goggles in an attempt to ease yourself.
kiri caught on, and one day he decided to try and talk about it with you. you two were eating lunch, the first st the table, and would probably have some time with the way kaminari was holding up the line. you'd just told a joke, and kiri was ending his chuckle when he suddenly went a little serious.
"hey, pebble?" you answered with a little hum, taking another bite of your food before meeting his eyes, not that he could tell. "you've been really stressed since we got that meeting with hatsume."
your face fell and you shifted uncomfortably in your seat. you broke eye contact only for a moment. "uh... kiri? can i ask you something?"
"of course, babe." he reached across and held one of your hands. "anything at all."
"uh..." you looked at your hand in his, feeling your chest grow warm but your heart begin to race. "would you... you'd be fine being with someone who...maybe...people... i don't know..."
kiri's brows furrowed before he spoke, his voice incredibly soft in the loud teenage-infested cafeteria. "you mean would i be fine with having a boyfriend who might look a little different? having a boyfriend who i love with all my heart, who is absolutely the most handsome person on the planet and who's always aiming to do things plus ultra? it wouldn't be very manly of me to lie, so yes. i'm over the moon to be your boyfriend no matter what's going on behind your goggles. none of it can change how beautiful you are to me." he gave a small, close-lipped smile, but it was warm and soft and real. he kissed your hand before squeezing it a little, only leaning back a little when he saw the rest of the squad was coming over. that was fine, though.
you heard all you had to hear. you pulled your hand away and pulled your goggles off, flinching and having to blink at the sudden light flooding your vision. and you look at your boyfriend, bright and gorgeous and real without any sort of filter between. you watched as his eyes widened into shock before softening into admiration, then pure love as he leaned forward and kissed you.
"jesus christ, get a room, shitty hair." bakugou grumbled as he took his seat, the rest of the group (especially mina) deciding that yes, you two were the adorable power couple. and then realizing your goggles were off.
when you opened your eyes from the kiss, your face red, mina gasped. you tensed and quickly turned to her, expecting disgust.
"that's what you've been hiding? they're so cool!"
kirishima laughed a little before reaching and holding your hand again. "yup. my cool, handsome pebble..."
CAN I JUST SAY I LOVE THIS BOY HHH HE'S SO PRETTY AND SWEET???
Mina Ashido
having very "weird" eye gang!! well, couple. everyone knew you were hiding your eyes, they just weren't really sure why, not that they ever really pressed. monoma did sometimes, trying to copy your quirk so his eyes could follow like how he got a horn with eri, but his eyes would never change into yours. (i tripped myself the fuck out writing that-)
but you two were the "weird eyed" people of your class. you were never treated differently because of it and acknowledged that whether or not you showed your eyes wouldn't effect the way your friends or girlfriend saw you, but you couldn't help feeling insecure.
in romance movies like the ones you and mina watched (doNT BE A BITCH BROS, ROMANCE MOVIES ARE MANLY AF), the guys had eyes their partners could swim in. even the actors with quirks that affected their eyes had gorgeous eyes that easily captured any audience.
all of mina's celebrity crushes had stunning eyes and you felt like you were at a loss. on one hand, goggles weren't the hottest thing, but on the other, would she find your double irises pretty enough to swim in.
not just that, but you don't think you could handle the questions from people. mina tried to hide it, but she got quite a couple questions herself and never completely knew how to deal with them. of course you'd help her out of those situations, but you know how much it can effect someone.
it wasn't until a trip out to the mall that you decided to share, though. you two were just window shopping. she'd point things out with her free hand and then happily explain what it was, where she found about it from, and so on. it was like this, her being the bubblegum of the relationship. it was nice, relaxing.
but then some kids from another school started walking in your general direction. they didn't try to hide that they were judging you two, and it was clear what they were judging when they pointed at each others eyes and laughed.
the way mina quieted down broke your heart a little. you paused your glaring to look at her, half expecting to see her looking upset. and yes, she was upset. but more than anything she was pissed. she stopped talking and narrowed her eyes at them, pretending to whisper but really speaking loud enough for them to hear.
"if i melt the floor under their feet, alibi me?" one of the students looked taken aback, but the other rolled their eyes.
"we're not scared of a satan wannabe."
and that made your blood boil a little. you huffed. "wanna say that again?" that wasn't you. no, you wanted to walk away, but mina wasn't having it.
"i said fuck off, demon eyes."
mina aimed and hit a spot next to their feet with her acid. suddenly they weren't so tough anymore.
"f-fuck, okay okay!" they ran off. and you felt. so fucking proud.
you smiled reaching and holding her other hand. "hey, mina?" she looked up at you. into your eyes, for the first time. her eyes widened a little and her anger quickly melted. "can i fight with you next time?"
she couldn't suppress her laugh, or the urge to peck your lips and then continued to drag you through the mall with her. you loved her. and you quickly found out, she loved swimming on your eyes.
Denki Kaminari
I JUST WANTED SOME FLUFFY TIME WRITING W HIM SJFNDN SORRY-
he literally has a lightening bolt symbol in his hair that he can't explain, he's not really going to be judgemental of you.
you are scared, though, of the judgement. he's another guy who can't keep anything to himself, not because he doesn't want to. he's been getting better with it, though, the past couple months, and you start to think maybe you can finally show him what you've been hiding.
you two were having a together night. it wasn't really a date. you two would stay in, maybe eat snacks, watch a movie or Impractical Jokers and cuddle. okay, so it was a date, but it really was more like chilling out.
you two were kissing at the moment, joe's loud laugh interrupting and making you both laugh along.
"glad you pulled away, i went into fight mode-"
"joe's laugh triggers your fight or flight?" a moment of silence, and then you were both laughing, hard. so hard that you ended up fogging up your goggles. you were starting to calm down when all of it just got uncomfortable. you casually took them off to clean the lenses with your shirt, still laughing here and there.
and then he noticed that your eyes were open. you were smiling, and it even looked like your eyes had an extra sparkle. he was also quick to notice how different they were, and then how your smile seemed to grow uneasy with time. you shifted and looked down at your goggles.
"pretty eyes," was all he could rush out. this man was short circuiting. his whole face was red and it got worse when you looked at him again. "i mean your- yeah you have uh- i- you-" he just kept stumbling, unable to put together coherent thoughts because the seratonin of seeing your four pupils expand at the compliments sent him over the moon and back. his lips pulled up into a smile and he started playing with your hair.
"you really um... you think so?"
he kissed your nose and then looked into your eyes up close. "can't believe you're my boyfriend," he mumbled back. he couldn't even properly answer your question because he was just obsessed with how stunning your eyes looked with the moonlight coming in from the window. "so-so you don't need your goggles?"
"no. not-not really. i'm n-not sure im ready for everyone else to see, though, you know? i-um, being open with them is still new for me. so-so if this can just stay between us-" he kissed your nose again.
"yeah, yeah." he couldn't hide his smile and you laughed and it made him smile more. "can i stay the night? i wanna... i kinda wanna wake up and see you without...without the-uh, without-"
"you can always spend the night, dork." you laughed and leaned into him. this was perfect. he was perfect. his reaction was better than you could ever dream-
joe laughed. denki jumped, his hands sparking a little, and you both laughed even harder than earlier.
Sero Hanta
why aren't there more gifs? look at him, he's so pRETTY FOR FUCKS SAKE, HE DESERVES MORE LOVE 😭 WAH (also this one's a little more like...angsty? IT'S SERO, SERO IS THERAPY-)
he knows a thing or ten about insecurities, especially ones that are hard to try and hide, let alone hide long-term. it took him a long time to embrace his elbows and the fact that he couldn't hide them. he did, though, especially once he started at UA.
you, however, hadn't reached that point. you'd been hiding your eyes even through the past several months of your relationship.
honestly, though, as lame as it sounds, what makes you give it up is just how exhausting and uncomfortable it is. you're scared to sleep without your goggles because who knows who's going to be around when you're up? you're scared to get too close in training because what if someone like bakugou blows them off your face? and the stares you get for wearing them, what must people think about you?
it was just exhausting, and one day, after a particularly bad argument with your parent about it, you decided to raise your middle finger at the world. you pulled on sunglasses and quickly made your way down the hall to your boyfriend's door. it was a saturday afternoon with nothing really planned, so of course he was in there playing some sort of video game after making sure all his school work was dealt with.
you heard him pause his game, turn it's volume down, and then his footsteps towards the door. he opened it with a soft smile to match equally soft and relaxed eyes.
"done studying?" he kissed your forehead before moving away from the door. he sat on the bed and gestured for you to grab the second remote to play with in.
"almost. just got off the phone with one of my fantastic parental units..." you closed the door behind you with a heavy sigh before grabbing the control from his desk and sitting next to him. he wasn't a todoroki, but he was always warm. at least to you. you leaned into his side with the control in your lap.
"uh oh... what happened there?" you realized he paused his game again, and you would've smiled if it weren't for the heaviness in your skull.
"i think im done with the glasses." that really got his attention, though he tried not to make a big deal of it. he wrapped one of his arms around you and leaned back. he wasn't going to push with questions. you were going to share what you wanted to. "im tired, sero. im tired of being scared of everything all the time. it's bad enough with everything our class is facing, academically and socially. i don't have the energy to be worried about how people look at me twenty-four-seven because my parents think who i am as a person isn't good enough." you had a lot more on your mind, but it could wait. this was already a lot to admit, not to mention that you ended it with taking the sunglasses off.
sero looked at you for a moment to process all you'd said and what you had done. he smiled when he finally did. "my boyfriend is such a good-looking, amazing hero." he pecked your lips before giving your shoulder a light squeeze. "thank you for sharing that with me. i know it's a lot to carry, and a lot harder to release. your eyes are perfect, by the way, and if anyone says differently, ill-"
"please don't caccoon them in the trees-"
"okay, that was two times and mineta deserved it."
you both shared soft laughter before relaxing in each other's presence.
"and thank you for trusting me to be the first to see them." it wasn't a joke or sarcasm or anything like that. it was genuine, drenched in honesty. get used to that, by the way, the honest compliments and admiration. he's going to remind you of it every chance he gets.
#x male reader#xmale!readerblog#angst#bnha#denki fluff#denki kaminari#bnha sero#sero hanta#sero headcanons#mina ashido#mina x male reader#bnha bakugou#bakugou x male reader#eijirou x reader#mha eijirou#bnha eijirou#fluff#male!reader#mha x male reader#mha#read with me lovelies
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Villain! Bakugo out here with a Mommy kink hoping for milk? Sign me up
I did a bunch of research on this, and am armed with practical knowledge of how Bakugou might treat you if he had a lactation kink.
(What to expect - HEAVY lactation kink, not super NSFW but it’s there, dubcon. I get a bit more explanatory and less smutty lol sorry)
At the beginning of his kink development, Bakugou wouldn’t necessarily be looking to actually make his partner lactate. He just finds the sensations comforting, lying on a pillowy chest, wrapping his lips around a nipple and sucking until he falls asleep. Does he have an oral fixation? Maybe, but that’s not necessarily why he’d do it.
Something about the closeness, the skin-to-skin contact, the trust and safety that’s felt just really gets him going. He gets all soft and relaxed, sucking on his babe’s nipples. As such a rough, irritated guy, the oxytocin he gets from committing such a deeply intimate act is literally like a drug to him. He wants more and more of that feeling, of the close connection with his darling, whether or not they’d be willing.
It’s a huge, huge act of love and generosity, especially taking the time to commit and induce lactation.
Bakugou would go all out, he’d have pumps, creams, make his darling eat a special diet, I think he’d even go to lengths to get lactation-inducing drugs. Lactation can happen outside of pregnancy, it just takes a lot of time, patience, and research.
Those drugs (like Domperidone) have to be taken 3-4 times a day, pumping has to happen pretty regularly, and the woman has to be relatively relaxed and in a good headspace. Stress, poor sleep, and a lack of water or food can result in a woman’s production lessening and drying up, so Bakugou’s darling really isn’t going to ever get a break.
Like, she’s stressed because she’s with him, because he’s so controlling and possessive and won’t let any other man even look at her. Stressed because Bakugou insists on her lactating, even if she’s not that into it or if it makes her uncomfortable. Stressed how needy and demanding the man is, how it’s his way or the highway, how if she doesn’t go along with whatever he wants, Bakugou accuses her of not loving him.
So already, it’ll be hard for lactation to happen.
But every night, just like clockwork, Bakugou’s there.
He’ll knead your breasts for a while, warming them up, enjoying the feel of them in his hands. Sometimes he’ll do this when you’re watching TV, or trying to cook dinner, or on your phone. Just sidles up behind you and grabs your chest, squeezing and groping and massaging the mounds with care.
While he’s rough and aggressive during sex, he’s more controlled during times like these, softer and less prone to acting like he’s got a toilet bristle brush shoved up his ass.
After he’s sufficiently “warmed you up” you get sat down somewhere comfy - sometimes the couch, but preferably the bed, just in case Bakugou feels a little more pent up than usual and wants to relieve some stress using your body in another way.
If he hasn’t stripped you of your shirt already, that’s next, along with your bra. Bakugou prefers you to be completely nude, but you find that extraordinarily uncomfortable, so after a couple of heated arguments, Bakugou’s decided to relent on that rule.
The man’s shirt comes off too, so he gets to lie flush against your and feel your soft flesh against his own.
The first couple of times, he had always started out far too eager, pulling and tugging at your nipple painfully, creating such a tight suction with his lips that it made you cry, and you’d begged him to stop. He hadn’t, not until you’d made milk for him. Something that you had thought to be impossible, considering you weren’t pregnant.
But not he starts of gentler, with soft kisses over your breasts, little kitten licks across your nipples, hands holding your sides, your shoulders, anywhere he could grab with uncharacteristic tenderness.
When he finally does dip down and begin sucking, it always feels weird. NO matter how many times he does this, you can’t feel comfortable with it. It’s such a strange, pulling sensation, relieving, emptying.
Bakugou’s figured out how to suckle and breath at the same time, just like a baby. He’ll purse his lips and nurse, stop for moment to breathe through his nose, then continue. This results in his warm breath intermittently puffing over your skin, making desperate little noises as he continues to drink you up.
You’d never have thought that Bakugou Katsuki could be defined as desperate, or soft.
Whichever breast he’s not sucking at gets massaged with one of his hands, tweaking the nipple, groping your flesh. You don’t know how or when he got so good with his mouth and hands, when he was able to practice coordination like that, but the movements are seamless for him.
He spends a significant amount of time lathering one breast with attention. If his jaw gets sore, or his mouth feels tired, he’ll pull of for a few moments to nuzzle at your plushy tits before latching on again.
And when he’s ready, he’ll switch to the other breast, hand immediately coming to spread his saliva around your nipple, to try and combat the chill that always makes you shiver whenever your spit-slick nipple gets exposed to the air.
All you can do is lay there and let him drink his fill.
Trying to catch his attention or try to divert him back to different activities is like trying to water a fake plant - absolutely nothing happens.
You get ignored, or Katsuki slaps at your hands if you try to pull him off, squinting up at you like a petulant child.
He usually falls asleep like that, it’s been months of the same routine, every single night. Bakugou suckling at you like you’re the first drink he’s had in years, obviously desperate and wanting, but trying his absolute best to hold himself back from devouring you.
Sometimes, if he’s excited, he’ll fuck you like that, hips slapping against your while he’s hunched over your tits, panting against your flesh.
Cumming always feels better when that happens, but it’s not like you’ll tell him that. He already pushes for you to let him nurse at your tits any chance he can get, and especially when it comes to sex.
Even after an intense, tiring fuck, Katsuki can’t fall asleep unless his mouth is on you, tongue sucking at your nipple.
Bakugou highly enjoys suckling at you at any time of day - right when he wakes up, before you’re even conscious, when you’re watching TV or reading a book, at lunch time... really any chance he gets, his face is buried in your chest. He always gets sleepy afterwards though, so he’s prone to even more irritability if he can’t take a nap, of which he completely denies. Says you try to use that as an excuse to not let him touch you, and then it’s back to the old argument of Katsuki claiming you don’t love him.
He’s manipulative, but you don’t know what else to do except give in.
During the day, he has timers set for when you’re supposed to take your lactation pills. The man had hand-fed you them at first, not trusting you to do it right yourself, considering how you were against the idea.
When he has work, Katsuki video-calls you, makes you take the pill and show him your mouth afterwords.
Pumping happens semi-regularly, only if Katsuki hasn’t been able to nurse for as long or as often as he usually does. You’ve learned not to do it while he’s around, even if he’s in the house working on paperwork. Katsuki hears the sound of the pump and suddenly appears, bulge in his trousers, a gleam in his eye.
So you do it when he’s away, per his rigid instructions. He makes you text him when you do, as a video call would make him too excited.
He’s very good at keeping you taken care of. When you’re starting to chafe and get sucked raw, he makes sure to slather your chest with cold creams and oils to speed up healing time, to heal the angry, swollen skin. It’s like your body dislikes his nursing as much as you do, with how often it seems to ache from his treatment.
Bakugou makes sure you get eat foods that help increase prolactin, the lactation hormone. Dates and Apricots are staples in your diet, and you’re sick of them. Bakugou insists you eat them anyway. You’re going to produce milk, no matter how much he has to force it.
You provide him with safety, security, a warm place to lay his head at night (your chest) and the one thing that seems to help him calm down in any situation.
When he comes home angry, you only have to wince through his rough fondling before he begins to pacify, and by the time his mouth reaches your breast, he’s quiet and relaxed.
Something’s agitating him beyond belief? he comes to you, salivating, expectant and sure of relief.
Whatever you want, however you feel - that’s all an afterthought, always has been, and always will be.
#Katsuki might be lack toes and taller ant#but he doesn't care#bakugou#katsuki bakugou#tw dubcon#tw.dubcon#yandere#but not really#Bakugou's just a horrible partner#and reader doesn't know how to get out#breastfeeding#idk if Tumblr will like get mad at that tag lol#lactation#lactating
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nanami kento [evenings with you]
nanami kento x reader || cw: descriptions of blood/injuries, light angst
a/n: this is just self-indulgent writing for me but i'm v stressed about school rn and this is the result. just imagine that y/n is a bio/medical phd candidate lol.
Nanami can tell that you're stressed. Usually you savor the nights he's not on overtime, asking him about work and refusing to leave his side for most of the evening. He's used to you being attentive, so the fact that you've asked him the same question twice within the last ten minutes is already setting alarm bells ringing in his head. You're constantly fiddling with something, or flashing furtive glances towards the bedroom when you think he's not paying attention.
It only gets worse after dinner. You insist on washing up, something about how you want him to 'enjoy his night off.' Nanami compromises, silently grabbing a towel and drying the dishes. It's clear that your mind is elsewhere. Your hands scrub the porcelain on autopilot, and he can hear you muttering under your breath.
Every now and then you'll mutter a list of tasks under your breath. Nanami remembers you mentioning that things were hectic in lab. You're almost always still working when gets home from work, even when it's well past when you eat your dinner. It's clear that you've had a busy day-- the apartment is far more cluttered than it usually is. There are post-it and pieces of scrap paper stuck to every single surface, and a forgotten pile of folded laundry rests on the couch.
An intense burning sensation across your palm causes you cry out. "Shit!" You drop the knife you were washing in favor of cradling your already bleeding hand. Nanami is instantly by your side, firmly pressing the dishcloth against your cut. There is a worrying amount of red seeping into the fabric, so he silently ushers you to the bathroom.
It's a strange reversal of roles. He's used to being the one leaning leaning against the counter while you bandage his wounds. Instead, it's you who is perched on the marble surface, wincing as he dabs an antiseptic soaked cotton ball against your injury. "Sorry, I'm almost done," he says when you let out a loud hiss.
"It's fine," you reply, sheepishly looking away. "I should have been paying more attention."
Nanami chooses to only respond with a nonchalant hum, focusing on cleaning your palm. The two of you sit there in comfortable silence while he applies ointment to the cut, adding gauze once he's finished. It's only when he reaches for the bandages that he decides to ask. "What's stressing you out?"
Your eyes widen as you realize you've been caught. Nanami is rarely home early these days, especially since he's been mentoring Itadori on behalf of Gojo. (Not that you mind - in the few times you've met Itadori through video call with Nanami, the pink-haired student's sunny disposition has never failed to cheer you up.) When he'd texted you saying he'd be home by dinner, you'd jumped at the opportunity to spend some much needed time with him. You'd pulled out the stops, cooking something a little fancier, and intent on spending the earlier part of the evening cuddling with him. Secretly, you had planned to sneak out of bed after he'd fallen asleep (he always goes to bed early on days like these) and finish preparing for the gauntlet of meetings and presentations you had tomorrow. It was your fault for putting off the tasks, and you didn't want to let your own bad habits get in the way of some quality time with your boyfriend.
"It's nothing, I just have a lot on my plate tomorrow." You do your best to laugh it off, but quickly trail off once when you catch Nanami's deadpan expression. He's always been too good at seeing through your white lies. "I put off some work..." A raised eyebrow from him prompts you to continue, "And I was planning on doing it after you went to bed..." You can't help it when your face scrunches into a pout. After all, now your carefully-laid deception has been revealed.
When Nanami bursts into amused chuckles, you're momentarily surprised, but quickly go back to sulking. "Stop laughing at me Ken!" you whine, "I'm a--"
"Self-aware procrastinator," he finishes your sentence with an amused grin. "I know love, I know. I've seen you write far too many papers within 24-hours of a deadline to be surprised." He presses an affectionate kiss against your wrist.
You scowl at your boyfriend, snatching your bandaged hand away from his grasp. "I'm glad that my suffering is entertaining for at least one person." You stomp back to the bedroom in faux-anger, smiling when you hear Nanami's footsteps not far behind you.
When he steps into the bedroom Nanami drapes his frame over your shoulders, his warm torso nestled against your back. "It is one of your more...endearing traits," he murmurs into your ear before pressing a kiss into the crook of your neck. You can feel your cheeks and ears tingle at his words of affection.
"Sometimes you can be such a sweet talker," you mumble to yourself while you change into your pajamas. This week it's been an old Jujutsu tech hoodie and a pair of well-worn athletic shorts.
"Only for you," Nanami replies while he undoes the buttons of his outfit, chucking his tan pants and blue button up into the laundry basket in the corner. He dons a pair of sweatpants before returning your side to recapture you in another affectionate hug. It's a well kept secret of the Kento-Y/N household that Nanami Kento likes to lounge around shirtless in the privacy of his apartment. (You've been sworn to secrecy, but only because your boyfriend claims that Gojo and the students would have a field day teasing him if this information were to be made public amongst the jujutsu sorcerer community.)
Turning around, you wrap your arms around his waist, burying your nose against his torso and taking in his comforting scent. It's been so long since the two of you have had a moment to yourselves, and for once your hectic thoughts are silenced in favor of sharing a moment of calm bliss with Nanami. He hums in appreciation, thumbs rubbing soothing circles against your hips.
"Do you want to watch anything tonight?" you ask after a few seconds of silence.
"No," he replies. "I was actually planning on reading the briefing Ichiji just sent me. Gojo apparently has another scheme up his sleeve." You giggle when your boyfriend lets out a pained sigh. On more than one occasion, your boyfriend has ranted to you about Gojo's unorthodox approach to exorcism. "I swear that idiot shaves a year off my lifespan every time I go on a mission with him," Nanami complains. "He's taking away the years I could spend in Malaysia."
You hum thoughtfully before responding, "Then do you mind--"
Once again, Nanami already knows what you're going to say. "Just remember to bring your laptop charger, I know you have a thousand tabs open on your computer right now," he says while exiting to the living room. After a few moments you join him, overburdened laptop and charger in hand. You both take your usual spots in the living room, him resting comfortably in the center of the loveseat and you sitting on a floor cushion, nestled between his legs. Soon you've fallen into a groove, fingers steadily typing on the keyboard. The warmth of Nanami's presence next to you brings a sense of calm, giving you the grounding focus you need to finish off the last of your tasks.
As he thumbs through the printouts Ichiji gave him, Nanami can't help but let his eyes drift towards you every now and then. You look so adorable when you work. From the way your brow furrows whenever you reread a line, to the way you unconsciously chew on your lip when you scrutinize your draft for any errors. Every now and then he'll gently run his fingers through your hair, relishing the content sighs you let out in response.
It only takes about another hour before you're (finally) closing all your tabs (he still doesn't know why your laptop hasn't crashed yet). As you scroll through social media, your head begins to droop. Soon enough you've fallen asleep, breaths coming in soft and even puffs as you rest against his thigh. Smiling to himself, he puts down his papers and gently lifts your body from the floor. He's careful not to wake you as he slowly makes his way back to the bedroom.
Setting you on the bed, he tucks you under the blankets before lying beside you. The moonlight coming through your window softly illuminates your relaxed features, and he softly traces the outline of your face with his thumb. As he continues to caress your cheek, his eyes are drawn to the dark circles under your eyes. He rarely falls asleep after you these days - between his physically demanding occupation and the ever growing number of things you are responsible for at work- he's often the first to fall asleep from sheer exhaustion while you work well into the night. Not to mention that he's had to spend an increasing number of nights away from you, either on challenging missions or accompanying Gojo's students. And while he knows most of your stress comes from being a student, he can't help but feel guilty about all the additional distress his status as a jujutsu sorcerer has caused you.
When you started dating him, you insisted that Shoko teach you how to suture. He hates how much your stitches have improved since then. The neatness of your stitches is a constant reminder of how much you've endured because of him. When he hears you trying to muffle your sobs into a pillow, he swears he can feel his heart crack in his chest, hurting more than any kind of physical wound from battle. Those nights end with him holding you tightly to his bandaged chest, murmuring reassurances and affection into the crown of your head until you've calmed down enough to fall into a fitful sleep. Even when you're unconscious he'll still continue, words morphing into apologies for the sadness he's inflicted upon your shoulders.
Feeling his eyelids being to droop, Nanami presses one last kiss against your forehead before laying down. He wraps his arms around your waist, surrounding you with warmth, hoping that his presence will be enough to keep your nightmares away, at least for tonight. I love you, y/n is the last thought he has before he drifts away, ready to dream of a tropical sunset and a peaceful future with you by his side.
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The Miys, Ch. 151
This chapter has been one that I have been dying to write for a while. I was worried that @baelpenrose would resist the idea, but he very much thought it was hilarious. As always, his input and riffing on this chapter has very much made it better and better.
However, it also made the chapter longer, lol. But there is just no way to trim it down without losing something that makes it all work, so this week is nearly double my normal length... break everyone’s heart, right? ;)
“I don’t like these numbers,” Parvati grumbled - as much as she was capable of grumbling - as she scrolled through the final counts of approval ratings on her and Hannah’s inaugural Food Festival.
The statistics had been dropped into our inboxes that morning, in the static of about a thousand other notifications now that Derek had finished the stress-test. Also included were the results of the last three invasion-prep drills, which I was in the process of scanning over.
“How bad are they?” I asked, half listening for a number. The drills were trending better, which was a good sign that the moves were effective.
Dismissing her display with a gesture of disgust, she sighed. “Seventy-four percent approval rating.”
I arched a brow and glanced over. “Did you adjust for those who did not attend?”
The glare she sent me wasn’t seen so much as felt. “Of course I did. First thing I ran…”
“Are you filtering by the day the comments came in?”
“I -” Bingo. She huffed. “No! These are intended to be ratings for the entirety of the event!”
I started scrolling through my own statistics. “Chart them out by the date the ratings came in, filtering out everyone who didn’t actually attend.”
A pause. “Oh… Oh! It’s showing ninety-three-point-four now!”
“Et voila,” I murmured. Louder, I clarified, “People like to weigh in early, and those who object in general tend to speak first.”
“I see that… how’s it going over there?” she asked, smoothing her braid over her shoulder as she turned to look at me directly.
“We are improving with every drill, marked upticks since the relocations. Arthur should be here in about - “ I glanced at a clock, “Seven minutes to go over next steps.”
Alistair breezed over to swap my empty bulb of cold coffee for a fresh one of water. “The appointment is in fifteen minutes.”
Parvati beat me to the punch. “He is also compulsively early, meaning…. Six minutes now.”
He rolled his eyes hard enough that I wanted to giggle. “He doesn’t even have the decency to be fashionably late. Appalling.”
Surely enough, Arthur paged at the entrance - out of some sort of manners I accidentally instilled in him - exactly five minutes prior to our scheduled appointment. As he breezed into my office, he managed a half-assed glare at Alistair for abruptly turning away and focusing on my schedule rather than his usual tendency to get a beverage for any newcomers. “Okay, updated data on drills isn’t what I want it to be.”
I laughed. “You’re joking, right? Your team and Michael’s haven’t gotten past deck four by more than three percent in the last seven exercises.”
“Any percent above zero is unacceptable,” he grumbled. I chalked it up to the indignity of being forced to get his own tea from the console.
Almost as though to spite Arthur, Alistair made a point to set a refreshed water bulb in front of everyone except the professor. “There are guards on the other levels for a reason,” he suggested drily.
“And I would rather those guards be idle, thank you,” Arthur threw back in a near-venomous tone.
“Us guards would rather be prepared for any eventuality, which you may do well to plan for in your petty drills.”
I didn’t even try to intervene. Clearly there was some blatantly disagreement between my admin and my friend, and I was exhausted from trying to make them cooperate.
“If I’m doing my job, you should be so grateful as to be idle,” Arthur drawled.
Alistair scoffed. “As if being left to rest and get fatter than a Christmas goose is a blessing…”
“You’ll live longer!”
“And get lax in my duties, which I will not stand for!”
“Get fat! Get lazy! LIVE! I don’t care! I’m not going to be lax in my duties to allow you the opportunity of getting practice at fighting.” Standing, Arthur buried both hands in his hair, but it looked less like he was running his fingers through it than pulling on it. “Are we really discussing this when we are training to fight in living body condoms?”
“I need to defend the Archives!”
“And Michael and I need to defend everyone! Us doing our job means you don’t need to do yours.”
My neck snapped back at the vehemence in his tone. This wasn’t their normal sparring… they may have never truly gotten along, but even in the beginning it was never so vicious.
To my further alarm, Alistair took a long stride forward and stared down his nose at Arthur. “We both know that she - “ his hand flung out to point at me “is either the luckiest or unluckiest person in existence. You can’t really believe that, in an actual assault on this ship, that she won’t be in danger. Which will place Tyche, the Archives, Derek Okafor, and Samuel Richardson in equal danger. You aren’t an idiot, you know this.” The hand pointing toward me turned, and time seemed to slow down as he stabbed Arthur in the sternum with it, punctuating each of his next words. “Stop lying to yourself.”
“Poke me again, and the finger comes off.”
“I would dearly love to see you try.”
Hannah and Parvati had jumped to their feet when Alistair approached Arthur, but were now slowly moving around to my position, safely behind my desk. Hannah hissed at me through clenched teeth, “You had to tell them to fight it out.”
“I thought they would use a gym, not the damned office,” I hissed back.
Before she could respond, Alistair spoke again. “You aren’t the only one on the Ark who wants to protect everyone. You need to trust us to do our bloody jobs.”
“The last time I trusted anyone else to protect people, I lost fourteen students,” came the ground out response. “I’m not backing down on this.”
“You will, or I will sedate you and strap you to a medical berth for the next four months.” Alistair stepped back and crossed his arms with finality.
A trickle of nerves ran down my spine as I watched Arthur clench his fists and release them. “You think the solution to everything is to tie it up, I swear.”
“Stop changing the topic. I am deadly serious, Farro.”
Arthur turned away from him, waving him off. “Try something else, you would never just sedate me for months on end.” Before we could stop anything, Alistair leapt forward and put Arthur in a headlock, only to be immediately flipped over the other man’s shoulder and onto the table. “Tch. Sloppy. I know you can do better.”
“I thought you wanted me to get fat and lazy,” Alistair grunted as he sucker-punched Arthur in the stomach and rolled for the other side. Once on his feet, he eyed Arthur carefully as he circled the table. “You stubborn ass, you know I am right. You are putting everyone in the lower levels at risk by not running preparedness drills with them, because you don’t want to factor in the fact that one of the offensive teams could fail.”
“We don’t have the luxury of failing, so no. If we do our jobs correctly, everyone who matters will be safe at the other end of the Ark.”
They didn’t seem to be at each other’s throats anymore, but the arguing wasn’t getting anywhere. “Guys - “ I tried.
Both men turned and practically screamed at me with their glares to stop talking. Oookay. I held up my hands in surrender and decided to let them sort it out their way.
Damned if the console wasn’t on the other side of them, though. I couldn’t even get popcorn and a drink.
Alistair blew a harsh breath through his nose. “If you won’t include the lower decks in your drills, I will start sparring with Jokul.”
“He would kill you,” Arthur barked in the most miserable laugh I’ve ever heard.
“God forbid,” Alistair mocked. “If I were gone, who would make your tea in the morning.”
“The same person who picks up the socks that magically appear all over my quarters every day, obviously. Worthington, I’m serious, he could really hurt you. He has really hurt me. And Charly.”
That last part was dismissed with a wave. “Madam Charles the First put the fear of herself into him.”
“And you haven’t. He could kill you by accident, and he’d never forgive himself.”
“Maybe that wouldn’t be the case if you would let me train more!”
Arthur groaned and ran a hand down his face. “You are an adult, we’ve talked about this. Train all you want, with whoever you want - Charly, Sophia, Tyche… hell, train with Evan or Michael, I don’t care. Just, not Jokul.”
When did they talk about this? I wondered. It had to be during a sparring session or something, because it definitely wasn’t in my office during one of our meetings. A glance at Hannah showed she was watching everything unfold like it was the most riveting show she had ever seen, and Parvati’s squint of consideration wasn’t much better.
“As you said, I’m an adult. Perhaps I should take your advice, and train with Charly - “
“See - “
“- and Jokul. She will make sure I don’t get hurt.”
Arthur flung his hands up in frustration. “You are so stubborn, I swear!” Growling, he paced in a circle. “Fine! Train with Charly and Jokul. IN the bivouac suit, though! And I don’t want to hear a word when you end up confined in a med bay yourself.”
Alistair’s smug grin showed just how much he seemed to care. “At least I would be spared of picking up the trail of dishes that seem to follow you around.”
“For the love of - they are my quarters! Mine! And I don’t want to hear about it when your bloody socks are constantly getting lost behind my sofa!”
Oh. Oh no. Nonononononono.
“My socks can go wherever they fucking want to, when I am constantly cleaning your disgusting whiskers out of the sink!”
“You know what would fix you having to clean whiskers out of the sink? I could just stop shaving altogether. How about...that…” Arthur trailed off and very slowly turned toward the three of us behind my desk with a look of dawning horror.
And I tried. I really, really tried not to laugh. I could feel my face reddening, my chest aching with the effort of holding it in.
Hannah’s snort was my undoing. As soon as that tiny noise escaped her, all three of us erupted into hysterical, stomach-cramping, tearful laughter. I felt stabbing in my arm as Parvati dug her nails in, trying desperately not to fall. Unfortunately for her, Hannah grabbed me at the same time and all three of us toppled to the floor. The sight of Arthur rolling his eyes and crossing his arms only made me escalate from laughing to shrieking in hysterics and relief.
I couldn’t speak for the other two ladies, but I thought the two men were going to end up killing each other… At no point did I think they took the other option when I told them to either fight it out or….
I gasped for breath, trying to get myself under control. Wobbling to my feet with the help of my trusty desk and a couple yanks to free my shirt from Parvati’s desperate clutching, I pointed between them. “This… how long? Can’t believe… didn’t figure it out.”
“Not everyone is as… public… as you, Conor, and Maverick are,” Arthur snarked at me. “You know, private lives should be private and all that?”
“Must be for you,” I confided in Alistair’s direction, where he had turned his back to our fit. “He’s never not told me when he was dating someone. Or thinking of dating someone. Or potentially interested in seeing if he was interested in dating someone… Best friend privileges and all that.” While I waited for Alistair to respond, my mind whirled through all the things I had brushed off before but were very obvious in retrospect.
Glancing at Arthur for a hint yielded nothing but a flat stare that all but declared in flashing lights You Aren’t Stupid.
I tilted my head at that, and kept thinking. There had been genuine animosity on Alistair’s side in the beginning, and not a small amount of needling on Arthur’s. So I knew it wasn’t something that had always been going on. My mind came to a screeching halt, however, when I remembered something - the day Alistair, Tyche, and I decided that, when I vacated my position on the Council, they would vacate roles as well to leave behind a ‘clean slate’. “Four years, holy shit,” I gasped. “Four years!?”
Finally, Alistair moved. His back was still to us, but his arms went limp by his sides, and his head dropped down toward the floor. “It would be unseemly to have the new Councilor of Education in a relationship with the attache to the Councilor for Resources and Engagement. Or formerly in a relationship, should things not end well.”
“And since he won’t be taking his position until we are on Von,” I put together, “You are okay to serve out the rest of my term, just not Hannah’s or Parvati’s.”
“Correct.”
“Huh. That makes sense,” I admitted before hopping up to sit on my desk, the chair being a lost cause on the other side of two women who were still sniffling and giggling on the floor. “I learned a lot today.”
“Uh huh,” Arthur confirmed drily. “And it had better stay in this office.”
“What?” I managed a pretty convincing confused face before pretending to realize what he meant. “Oh! The relationship thing. Yeah, cool, whatever. That’s not what I was talking about, but you’re good.”
“Dare I even ask what you meant?” Alistair ventured, finally turning around so that he could give me a warning look.
“Uh, isn’t it obvious?” I asked, shaking my head and spreading my hands, palms up. When they both just stared at me, I finally broke and grinned. “Dude. You two are freaking slobs.”
The squeaking noises coming from the vicinity of my feet told me that no further work would be getting done for the rest of the day.
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#the miys#found family#humans are weird#science fiction#aliens#apocalypse#humans are space orcs#humans are space fae#earth is space australia#post apocalypse#post post apocalypse#original science fiction#original sci fi#original writing
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To You (4)
Summary: harry dates y/n to get closer to her best friend
Warnings: mild angst (what else lol), not a lot of dialogue for this one, and a bit of fluff
Word Count: 2775 words
A/N: I've had the worst writer's block for this series but then inspiration struck me at 2 am and I had the chance to write a lil sumthin sumthin for the next part :D
Read the full series in my masterlist (bio)
As I mentioned before, this story kind of goes backwards.
____
As self-deprecating as it is, Y/N couldn’t help but feel her guard lower with each fleeting glance at her phone. She didn’t mean to, really. It wasn’t as if she was bored out of her mind because she was the opposite of that.
Going on her phone and tapping on Instagram was more of a distraction from studying if anything. She was hounded by piles of homework and pages of readings to do by the end of next week. It seemed that her brain was working in constant overdrive to try to remember the endless concepts and theories that were catapulted at her with no signs of stopping. Her eyes were straining from the constant stimulation from her laptop screen, and from trying to read the small letters plastered on the computer.
Y/N was studying on her designated studying days, as usual. She was quite proud of sticking to the schedule, except for the few weeks that she opted to coddle herself in the confines of her warm blanket because that was around the time that she found out her boyfriend, Harry, was only using her to get close to her best friend, Louise.
——
In retrospect, Y/N should have seen all the signs blaring right in front of her face all along. She gave herself facepalms more than she could count by the way she was—quite literally—blinded by love to realize that Harry’s feelings were nothing but a façade. That Y/N was nothing but a pawn in his game; a character to manipulate, disposable in order for him to get the woman he actually wanted. And Y/N had no doubts that her ex-boyfriend was treating Louise like a queen.
Y/N wore red-tinted glasses while she was with Harry and she didn’t see the red flags rising every time he shaped their evening around Louise’s schedule. She thought that Harry was making such a good effort in getting to know the people close to Y/N’s life that he insisted on having Louise around whenever they hung out with her friends.
Harry asked endless questions about Louise; from where she worked to what she was interested in—to which Y/N had foolishly answered, believing that she had found the perfect man to share her life with. But she should have known when he didn’t do the same for her other friends. Hell, he didn’t even do the same to her!
___
When Harry and Y/N were just friends, he didn’t bother getting to know her as thoroughly and comprehensively as he did with Louise. In fact, it could be argued that Harry hated Y/N when they were first introduced by—and this was ironic—Louise!
Louise spoked highly and excitedly of ‘my friend, Y/N’ and with Harry being the loved-up simp that he was—wanted to please Louise by appearing interested in her friend. He guessed that he was probably too good of an actor (not to toot his own horn) because that meet up turned into a set-up.
Louise had planned a date for her friends, Y/N was indifferent to it; she was even a little excited because she thought that Harry was sort of nice. Despite the fact that he was indirectly rude to her in their first meeting, Y/N didn’t hold grudges on people for their first impressions. She believed that anybody could have a bad day and that might just be the time when Harry was dragged by the arm to be introduced to her.
Y/N understood if that was the case. She was not too keen on acting nice and friendly after a stressful day at work, or a hard study session at the library. So even if Harry was practically snarling at every word she said from his seat around the rounded booth table of the bar—she agreed to go on a first date with him.
——
Harry was in shambles.
He got himself into quite an intricate mess trying to attain the woman of his dreams. He was such a pleaser that he was now contemplating inside his car, outside of Y/N’s address. Was this all worth it? Of course, it was. As much as Harry would like to say that this was part of his plan to make Louise his girlfriend, it really wasn’t.
But that didn’t mean that he couldn’t use it to his advantage.
It was a good thing that he was early—about twenty minutes or so. That was only because he was huffing the whole time Harry was buttoning the clutches of his dress shirt, shaking his head at the bathroom mirror and reprimanding himself for letting his lovesickness to get him deeper than he would like. But hey, the sooner Harry got to Y/N’s place, the sooner this ‘date’ would be over.
So here he was, hidden in the shadows of the night sky and shielded by the heavy tint of his Range Rover. Palms were pressed on the lush leather steering wheel as Harry formulated how he could turn this around in his favour. He was already in Louise’s good books for even agreeing to this in the first place—why not make Y/N his own personal wingman?
Granted, that she didn’t actually know Harry well enough but maybe this date could reach Louise’s ears about how much of a romantic, perfect, and chivalrous gentleman Harry could be. That would surely make Louise like him, right?
Wrong. Absolutely wrong.
It was safe to say that Harry was feeling guilty the moment he decided to use Y/N in order to get to her best friend, but that ship sailed long ago when anger and frustration took over. Why in the hell was he so perfect to Y/N’s eyes that she had gushed about him to her best friend minutes after he had dropped her off?
Why did Harry have to knock on her door with a single-stemmed rose clutched in his fingers, doing a little bow to add humour when she opened the door? And what in God’s name possessed him to say that she looked beautiful that night in her pretty, deep green dress that he thought was absolutely gorgeous on her—but his heart was with another woman—fully knowing that it would look better on Louise?
“Why. . . just why,” Harry asked himself as he sat at a table with Y/N, Louise and her boyfriend, Dylan.
That was what being romantic got him. That was where declaring Y/N as his unofficial wingman ended him upon. A double date with the woman he wanted with Y/N looking at him as if they’ve been together for years, when in fact, they had only known each other for a few weeks.
Harry’s pride was too big to admit that this time; he couldn’t get the girl. And so, his bruised ego declared that this date was just another unplanned situation that would benefit him—somehow, someway—in the future.
Wrong again.
Because a month later, Y/N was running off to her lecture with a bag strapped over her shoulder, leaving Harry a passionate kiss on the lips. He was quite ashamed to say that he enjoyed the affection, but not enough to ignore the throbbing of his heart
Harry wasn’t all in with his relationship with Y/N and he knew exactly why. For months, he had been pining for Louise and well, he ended up with her best friend, Y/N. Now that was just super unlucky for him. And he wasn’t usually a mean person, but Harry was very annoyed with fate (or destiny) for leaving with an ultimatum.
First, leaving Y/N risking her tattling to Louise about him breaking her heart was a no-no. Second, staying with Y/N until she realizes that both of them were no good together. The latter was a much more pleasant choice, except the fact that it could take months for Y/N to acknowledge that she and Harry were both too different for each other.
——
It was another four months later when Harry drew upon an epiphany very similar yet completely different from the ultimatum he had presided.
Y/N was sure of her feelings more than ever, even dropping the ‘L’ word during a drunken stupor of wine and bubbly champagne. Harry was sure that she hadn’t remembered her confession the next morning because she never brought it up. However, those words that escaped her lips were enough for Harry to overthink each night one or the other slept over.
Sometimes Y/N’s snores would serve as background noise to his serene imagination, wondering why the images of Louise and him doing couple-y stuff were now replaced with Y/N’s figure instead.
He also pondered if his memory was so impeccable that he could hear Y/N’s laugh fluttering in his ears while she was sound asleep beside him or was it just because she released a chuckle every time he made a horrible joke?
(It was true. Y/N never left Harry hanging in the air with a questionable punchline of a head-scratching joke. Both of them knew that her giggles were pity laughs. Harry was thankful for it and Y/N just couldn’t resist painting a genuine smile on Harry’s face, looking so proud that he had made her laugh.)
Harry was certain that his feelings for Y/N wouldn’t quite reach the threshold that he held her for now. But it seemed that he was getting a lot of his sworn predictions wrong lately. Sure, their first encounter (and the second, and the third. . .) were purely for satisfaction’s sake. A mere plot for Harry to build his boyfriend resumé for Louise.
Harry wasn’t sure when his feelings shifted from civil and friendly to an ever-evoking, lovesick puppy.
Maybe it was the way Y/N walked, straight into his heart and stole it, keeping it safe in her tender hands when she pressed a lingering kiss on his lip while she ran off to catch the bus. The way Harry would pout when Y/N forgot the routine she had set, resulting in him whining her name and sometimes chasing after her to get his much-needed kiss. He even started calling it his ‘good-luck charm’ because it seemed like without it; Harry came home more drained and tired than usual because nothing went right that day.
Or maybe it was the way she giggled while reading something on her phone, laptop, or a book—even if it was for school purposes. How absolutely pleased he was to hear her melody of giggles, straining his ear to listen more closely and wanting to do nothing more than to hear it again because it was music to Harry. It usually ends with Y/N’s heaving breaths, begging him to stop tickling her.
Was it because she was the most adorable little thing while she was asleep? No, it couldn’t be, Harry thought, even though the admiration in his eyes cannot be described as anything other than glazed over with love and affection with the way he stared at Y/N’s sleeping face.
But why can’t he stop thinking about her when she wasn’t around? Harry felt like he was missing a part of himself as soon as he shut the door to his house because Y/N had to go to her own place.
Why did a smile splinter his lips visualizing Y/N studying at her kitchen table with a topknot wobbling on her head and a pair of her thick-rimmed glasses slipping down the bridge of her nose? Harry still remembers the first time she asked him to redo the bun on her head, complaining that it was loosening and that she couldn’t focus when strands were haywire.
Harry made sure to be extra careful as to not accidentally pull on her scalp, stretching the hairband around his fingers.
Now, he only had a minute experience in hair styling, reminiscing to his long-haired days were he slipped his hair into a neat ball in a few seconds or less. But this was Y/N, his girlfriend, who had an adorable pout on her face. The finch between her brows deepening when she tried to understand the concepts written on the screen yet she would giggle when Harry would ask her, ‘Am I hurting you?’ and shake her head ‘no’.
——-
So it was a bit questionable when Harry jumped at the chance to kiss Louise when the time came.
She had just broken up with her boyfriend and called Y/N for comfort. However, Y/N was about to leave for an exam worth half of her grade and she couldn’t just not attend it. She may love her best friend with all of her heart, but not enough to waste thousands of dollars to redo a course because she missed the final exam.
Hence, why Harry was sent in place of Y/N instead. And that was also how his plump lips managed to lock itself with Louise’s’ glossy ones. He should’ve felt guilt stab him right away when he tasted wet, salty tears on his tongue when he battled for dominance with Louise.
Harry should have pulled away when his phone buzzed in his pocket; a message from girlfriend that she had just finished her exam and was ready to be picked up now so that she could give love and comfort to her best friend.
Harry’s subconscious must have reminded him that this was the woman whom he had spent months pining on; desperately trying to make her his yet failing. And now that he had the chance to, he couldn’t stop.
Instead of doing everything his conscience had practically yelled at him to do, Harry’s brain had buffered—his body numbed every nerve except the ones controlling his mouth because their persisting kiss was captured by a photographer hidden amongst barricades that Harry had failed to take notice of.
Harry was sure that his presence was hidden to the best of his abilities, but he guessed that Louise’s hands had pulled his hoodie off in the midst of their make-out session, revealing his side profile and the unruly curls on his head.
And that was how Y/N identified the image on her phone the time she felt her heart being ripped out and crushed into pieces. That, and the fact that Harry wore the same clothes she had seen him in before she left.
____
And now, as Y/N paused her thumb from scrolling away from the image on her screen, the same pain and heartbreak still throbbed in her chest.
She couldn’t seem to forget, as a lot of people say, what Harry did to her. Despite the fact that he was spotted outside her door, leaving boxed gifts of chocolate and flower bouquets a few minutes ago—Y/N simply didn’t have the capacity to sweep everything under the rug.
The wound was still fresh—feeling air was enough to have her hissing, aiming to cover the cut in fear that it would become too painful to even ignore. For weeks, Y/N had to wallow in agonizing self-pity to remind herself that Harry didn’t deserve her or her love for him and now she was somehow ready to run back into his arms?
She absolutely despised the way her hands twitched to send him a text. To leave him a voicemail or to simply tap his contact just to hear him speak to her again. Y/N was ashamed to admit that he thought about knocking on his front door just for another chance at seeing him again. An opportunity to ask him if he was happier with her (ex) best-friend—if Harry loved Louise more than he did with her. Or—and most of all—if Harry ever did love Y/N during their short relationship. Was everything just a game to him?
She was doing good so far; she was strong enough to withhold from the urges of communicating with an ex. However, Y/N knew it was only a matter of time before Harry took extreme measures to speak to her, unlocking her door with the spare key she had given him. One day she would be met with his figure in the hallway with a sad smile on his face and three long-stemmed sunflowers in his hand and Y/N wouldn’t be able to resist him.
Y/N hated herself for being so weak whenever Harry was involved. He was her Kryptonite; getting too close to him was what ripped her to shreds.
___
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in honor of kit's birthday, why not a quick little kit smut?
starts off as a little fluff lol
warnings: smut, penetration, fingering, oral sex, just regular smut
song insp: courtship dating and affection both by crystal castles
ight so boom.
"Come on! Slow down flash." Kit yells from the other side of the asylum caf trying his best to catch up to your incredible speed. Kit and you were inseparable, no matter how many times the nuns tried seperating you guys, you'd always find a way to hang out or at least see eachother.
Playing tag was your favorite game to play since it didn't require a board game with boring little pieces or any difficult rules. "Ok! I'll give you a headstart! Only 5 seconds!" you yell back causing a little disruption. Kit speed walks towards you not wanting to run anymore.
You giggle at the sight of Kit completely out of breath infront of you as he tapped on you, causing him to giggle along with you pausing suddenly taking a second to admire the beauty he had infront of him. The eye contact you both held brought nothing but butterflies, rising your need to have his soft plump lips against yours, but you dont dare make a move preventing any sort of punishments coming from Sister Jude.
Kit grabs your hand signaling you to sit down alongside him by the window which seemed nearly empty from the patients hating the sunlight. "Hey, I have a plan.. Its risky but we can have some alone time?" Kit whispers feeling the tension you two imprisoned. Taking his hand into yours you whisper back "What's on your mind baby?". Kit plans "Well, we go back to our prison cells at 9:00 pm. Jude usually leans around till 9:30 pm. We were the only ones who ate today's toasts. Lets say we got immensely sick hey? Get our "medical help" and meet by the girl's bathroom. Whatcha think?"
You were totally down for Kit's quickie plan but were terribly scared of getting caught. Knowing the result will be awful you honestly respond with "I dunno Kit. Its very risky. But I'll do it!"
"Shh"
"Shit sorry. Only if you're staying by my side though."
"Im not leaving you alone Y/N.. We're inseparable my love, dont ever forget that. "
All of the patients were escorted to their cells for their bedtime. As soon as you hear the hourly beep for 9:00 pm you keep track of time for 30 minutes. Focusing on every minute to second that passes by from the top of your head you prepare for your act, knowing that Kit is more then ready. You soon hear familiar deep coughs from the right side of your cell, knowing it was time. As you begin coughing harshly you hear keys jingling down the hallway unlocking a cell. Knowing you were next you continue coughing almost making yourself throw up.
"Y/N! What is going on in there?!" You hear a familiar feminine voice question in concern. "I- I can't breath! My stomach is killing me!" you continue your act, pretty impressed in yourself. The lady opens your cell and your heart automatically skips a beat at the sight of your lover alongside the nun, smirking slightly in between coughs.
Each step you took down the soundless hallway to the nurses was raising your heartbeat by the second not losing the tension Kit's aurora gave you.
When you all arrived at the nurses office and sit down for a few seconds, Nurse decides to break the silence. What the hell is wrong with you two? It's literally bedtime." she questions in annoyance. You silently chuckle hearing the word "hell" come out of a nun's lips. "I don't know, I suddenly wasn't able to breath properly and my stomach started hurting really bad." Kit says in "pain" mimicing your words. "And you?" the nurse asks pointing at you with her black pen decorated with a little cross. "I feel the same way. All I ate was the buttered toast, I dont usually feel like this." You add the fact that you ate the toast to make your lie far more believable. "I ate the toast too. It seemed like nobody wanted them so I gave it a try." Kit adds, completing the perfect lie.
"Second time this week the chefs' failed once again at their job. I apologize on their behalf.. I'll get you some pain relieving pills. Give me a sec." The nun apologizes heading to the big creaky door towards the basement where all medications were in storage.
I look over at Kit nerviously, who's sitting on the patient bed, uncuffed surprisingly. He seemed so excited and just overall ready to destroy your guts. "Aren't we going?" you ask perplexed to the fact he's just sitting there smiling not moving a muscle. "Escape rules 101: Leave five seconds after your kidnapper, or you'll get caught. Boom!" You giggle at his words aware he made it all up, still taking it into advice though. "Five, four, three, two.. one! Run Y/N runnn!" he insists.
Kit grabs your hand soft but steady as he drags you down another hallway towards the girl's bathroom. Warm air kissing the both of your faces as you glide down hallway to hallway with your favorite person in hand, smiling and giggling, pure ecstasy and excitements on your faces, as you arrive at your destination.
"Check if the stalls are empty on your left im checking on my right, babe" you smile at the sudden nickname Kit had put on you and proceeded to follow his commands giving him a quick thumbs up from the other side of the bathroom signaling him that the coast was clear, he does the same.
You choose the stall furthest from the door pulling Kit in with you locking it immediately "So now what?" Kit teases almost as if he were to be taunting you, acknowledging your need through your eyes. "You tell me." you attempt to tease back. "What if I show you?" he whispers, leaning into your neck. "Show me then.." you whisper back suddenly gasping at the sudden touch of Kit's delicate pink lips against your neck. His soft kissing, licking and sucking against your neck making your core wet by the second. Becoming stressed from his soft teasing you grab his jaw gentley, leading his lips to your own.
As you two kiss passionately you feel his tongue silently asking for enterance which you allow, the makeout now becoming intense. You feel his hands suddenly lifting your gown, sliding your underwear to the side, looking you in the eye with question for consent which you also allow. Kit begins rubbing your wetness delicately as he slowly inserts a finger inside making you whimper in pleasure grabbing onto his strong masculine shoulders. With now two fingers in your core, you begin jacking off Kit through his well fitted sweats producing a light angelic moan to fall out of his lips. You decide to quickly undress him teasing his member devilishly.
"Now you'll have to finish what you started gorgeous." Kit whispers reffering to your teasing on his. You drop down to your knees slowly tracing your fingers down his body, stopping right below his belly button making him groan deeply in need. "So needy for me, baby" you tease as you suck his member whole causing him to grip your thick hair for support. The combination of your moans vibrating on his now soaked member and your massaging on his balls, made his release speed up more then ever.
"Im cl- close Y/N.. You're doing such a good job for me" he praises while nutting in your mouth which you swallow quickly, avoiding the slight bitter taste. Kit picks you up with no notice and leans you against the stall you both shared slowly sliding his member past your submerged folds. You moan instantly at the feeling of Kit's cock filling you up completely hitting your g-spot everytime. You're both breathlesss in the moment, your loud moans echoing through the flickering lights of the bathroom, holding onto his shoulders for support your arms wrapped around his muscular sweaty waist.
"F-fuck Kit. Im cu-.." not being able to finish your words due to the amazing sensation you were feeling on your core, you feel instantly empty as Kit pulls out of you to finish your high with his mouth.
Kit tongue fucks you, and licks between your folds to finally sucking on your clit liberating your release in his mouth which he sucks up every drop of. Your body collapses onto his still trying to process the intense moment you both divided.
"I love you, Y/N" Kit lovingly says while lookin down at you with innocent eyes. "I love you too, Ki-"
Getting brutally interrupted you hear screaming "Where the hell are you two!" you both hear the nurse, footsteps running up and down the hallways. You quickly get dressed and kiss Kit your goodbyes as he flies past the huge door into the boys' bathroom which luckily was right next to the girls'.
"I-Im here!" you manage to scream back, sticking two fingers down your throat forcing yourself to throw up. "I just got really sick and needed to throw up, sorry." you apologize looking up at the lady who's eyes were boiling in anger. You were pretty sweaty, hair tousled, and hands were shaky. Made your lie pretty believable. "Where's kit?" nurse asks calmly this time now that she's found you. "Im not too sure I think he ran to the boys' room, he got really red and well ran out, seemed sick also." You manage to convince.
Nurse walks out, disgusted by your view heading into the boys' room in which she's not allowed into. You jump at the scary sounds Kit made from the other side of the wall, relieved you two had mentally communicated the same plans.
Managing to clean yourself up a bit you hear hard knocking on the girls' bathroom door. You timidly open up to the view of nurse and Kit. Relieved you smile to yourself a little, Kit realizes and taps on you playfully.
"You're it, loser."
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Aww yeahhh time for Kiyo to make his entrance!
I wrote an entire essay about him (again whoops) so it’s very long and under the cut for your viewing pleasure ;)
Kiyo
Age: 29
Hair color: Green
Eye color: Brown
Element: Stars
Kiyo, the Guildmaster of the Asterstone Guild! He only took up the position recently and has had the Guildmaster title for about a year and a half. He was the previous record holder for youngest Guildmaster until that title was stolen by Taku. (Kiyo holds a grudge about it but it’s playful.)
Kiyo, just like lots of other characters in ATS, was taken in by the Asterstone Guild at a young age. He’s similar to Shima in that he has no previous memories before showing up outside the guild one day, battered and bruised. (That marks three characters in this series with amnesia now! Wrow) He grew up under the watchful eye and tutelage of the previous Guildmaster, and because of how attached to him she’d gotten, it wasn’t long before he began to express desires to take over the guild once she retired. After a lot of thought and contemplation she eventually handed over the position to him. This initially resulted in a lot of outrage from the guild members because they did not think Kiyo was suited to be the Guildmaster, but he eventually proved them wrong once he stepped up to the plate and showed them he could act like a true leader!
They did have good reason to be nervous about that, though, as Kiyo is normally a very laid-back and carefree person and is strictly non-violent. This has lead into lots of situations where he’s opted out of fighting, leading his guildmates into lots of trouble when they needed a hand, and they labeled him as both a coward for avoiding necessary battles on missions (which is practically a requirement for a guild member going out on dangerous quests, you sort of have to have a battle prowess to take on any foes) and lazy for not participating when he should. Initially this bothered Kiyo a great deal, but the previous guildmaster assured him that not everybody is suited for battling others, and that he can still pave his own way to success in a non-violent manner. While Kiyo may not have a liking for fighting, he has an extremely smooth tongue and is very capable of talking himself out of sticky situations (mostly by bribing. He is VERY good at that lmao). He has a talent for manipulating others into doing what he wants them to, though he rarely uses this on people he considers friends. When Kiyo’s able to complete a mission and win the day without resorting to using their elemental powers in a fight, his guild members have to stop and think for a second like. Hold on. He just did that so easily, he made it look so simple, we really need to stop underestimating him and calling him totally useless (Kiyo: Hey. HEY).
Kiyo’s pretty close to all of his guildmates despite their constant ribbing—the one person he’s close to that adores him completely is Lacie, because he was the person to bring her into the guild (she was around 10, he was 17), and being the first person to genuinely show her kindness that wasn’t for ulterior motives, Lacie became very attached to him. Kiyo acts like an older brother to her, and Lacie supports him in whatever he does. She was thrilled when he took on the Guildmaster position, and he has a very soft spot for her :’) She always sings his praises to anybody outside who will listen, and gets angry at Emrys the one time he called Kiyo incompetent.
After becoming the guildmaster, Kiyo actually does a good job at taking charge despite the general opinions that he wouldn’t. He’s still very casual about it though and is a bit more flexible with how the guild is run, preferring to let the guild members do things their own way and be less strict about the overall rules. He’s basically got the “Do whatever you want!” and “Just wing it!” outlook, and while a lot of the members don’t like this attitude, a lot of them do. At the end of the day they all do respect him, though! While he isn’t a fighter he’s very good at giving orders and keeping things in check around Asterstone lol
Despite Kiyo’s insistence on staying out of battles, he’s actually an extremely skilled fighter, and is probably the strongest and most dangerous person in the entire guild. The issue with this, though, is that whenever he gets into a fight, he tends to get too “serious” and starts going off the walls, treating the battle as a game and something fun and entertaining. This leads into him not knowing when to stop, and nobody else being able to stop him, so he’s seriously injured other people without meaning to—revealing that he’s actually terrified of violence because he loses himself in it, and why he prefers to stay on the sidelines. It’s only when Kiyo gets really serious in battles that a darker side comes out, and where the star mark in his eye appears. It’s only been seen a few rare times throughout his life at the guild, so nobody really thinks much of it or notices it. It’s only after the star mark appears that Kiyo passes out afterwards, having exerted a lot of power and extremely skilled battle prowess nobody has ever seen before. However, after a grand guild tournament where Kiyo faces off against Taku and gets too into it, revealing his star mark and almost slicing Taku’s head clean off, one of Kiyo’s advisors at the guild starts to look into it out of concern for both Kiyo’s safety and that of others.
In the middle of all this mess, Kiyo meets Toru, and after nearly forcing him to join Asterstone, the two start growing closer 👀 Toru joins the squad of not putting up with Kiyo’s bullshit, but that’s only after he gets over his starstruck fanboy phase. Because Toru is newer to the guild and because he’s a non-elemental not suited for fighting, Kiyo instantly becomes attached to him, finding similarities in their preferences and backgrounds. While Toru does think Kiyo’s an idiot sometimes he treats him very kindly, and is usually the first to defend him when the other members playfully tease him, so Kiyo’s just like you are an angel sent from heaven just for me and I adore you. Still though with Toru being a non-elemental Kiyo stresses about his safety CONSTANTLY, even after Toru gets official training in self defense. If Toru’s in danger Kiyo will blow off literally everything else to go rescue him first, which the other members have to get used to as it happens more often than they’d like akdasbmlads
Later down the line the guild is caught up in something terrible, and find themselves being targeted by a descendant of a great inventor and sorcerer (not Elymas this time tho lol). She’s apparently seeking what’s known as the Velle Nova, and has reason to believe Asterstone is in possession of it. After Kiyo’s forced to fight and unleashes the power behind his star mark, the descendant reveals that Kiyo has the Velle Nova, and then the truth finally comes out…
Kiyo remembers everything about his past. Years ago, his town had been caught up in a great disaster, and he was the only survivor. He was forcibly taken in by several scientists, one of them being the ancestor of the girl descendant. They were attempting to recreate the Velle Nova, one of the great sorcerer Elymas’ inventions, which is said to grant any sort of wish imaginable. They wanted to claim that power for themselves and possess the powers of the universe itself. However every attempt had failed, and without the real Velle Nova they couldn’t achieve what they were after. So they decided to pour all of their research into Kiyo instead, and try to create the weapon inside of a human being. This ended up making a twisted, broken version of what should have been the Velle Nova. But Kiyo couldn’t contain its power—it was going to unravel the universe itself and either destroy everything or alter it tragically into something unimaginable. One of the scientists working with the group realized how awful their experiment was and, being a Time elemental, decided to erase Kiyo’s memories (with some help) and send him centuries into the future so that the rest of the group couldn’t get their hands on him. Hence Kiyo winding up outside of Asterstone with no memories, and the truth behind his star mark. It had been granting Kiyo his wish the whole time—the longing to protect the things he cares about by being able to defeat any threat in his way. Of course with the unstable power that he can’t control, it usually leads into disaster;;
Kiyo, now having recovered his memories, realizes that the same thing is going to happen again, and decides to seal himself off to protect Asterstone and the world before the universe unravels. Cue an epic PMD-esque goodbye scene where he bids farewell to Toru, gives him his trademark scarf, and vanishes, escaping into a dimension between time and space where his power can be contained. *Starts playing I Don’t Want To Say Goodbye*
Toru, absolutely devastated by Kiyo’s farewell, decides he’s going to break time and space to save his man, except there’s one small issue...nobody else remembers that Kiyo even existed, and Toru only managed to by some miracle (and also maybe bc Kiyo handed him his scarf idk some magic soul connection thing). But after a while...a long while, maybe like a year or more...they finally unlock the key to finding Kiyo!!
Toru and Kiyo share a tearful reunion, and Kiyo cries a lot because it had been so lonely sitting in that black hole all by himself for so long. Toru begs Kiyo to come back, and suggests that Kiyo separate himself from the Vella Nova in order to live a normal life, but Kiyo informs him that he and the Vella Nova...are the same. They’re the same combined entity! Kiyo says that if he tries to unfuse, he’ll just end up destroying himself, because there’s nothing to separate, being one singular existence. So Toru points out uh hey since you’re the same thing, don’t you get a say on how your power is used? “It’s your power, Kiyo” yes we’re referencing Tododeku here we go
Kiyo’s like hmm uh yeah I guess you have a point;; so we went through all that for nothing huh. And Toru tells him you’re a fucking moron and Kiyo’s like ahh yes but you loved this moron enough to come rescue him from the void ;) And they kinda sorta confess but not really? Kiyo’s too nervous and Toru’s too distracted trying to figure out how to get them out of there but no worries they sort it out later. Kiyo tells him that hey I’m still dangerous and I could lose control at any given moment and Toru’s just like well I guess we’ll just have to stop you and bring you back to yourself. So with the knowledge that he’s got a whole guild of awesome people backing him up and a boy who broke the laws of the universe to save his ass, Kiyo and Toru escape the rift and finally return home together 💕 And that’s pretty much how their arc ends!
Extra personality traits
-He has a really short attention span so this makes things painfully hard on mission briefings, which leads to Kiyo usually screwing up the mission one way or another
-He often charges ahead without thinking and is the first one to become a target in a bad situation. Nobody really feels bad for him though because most of the time it’s his fault for walking right into it LMAO
-He can be very childish sometimes and most of the time he does it on purpose. His guildmates complain that their leader is a whiny, immature brat
-He is an expert on how to annoy people do not test him oh my god
-He can be incredibly selfish;; He’s gotten better with it during recent years, but he got scorned for it a lot when he was younger. He’s also very emotional, and you can read what he’s thinking like an open book! When his friends can’t read him that’s when they start getting worried.
-He has no experience in romance whatsoever and it’s the one (1) thing that can get him flustered. Nobody at the guild has ever seen Kiyo get mildly embarrassed or caught off guard, so they begin to think it’s impossible to make him blush. Then Toru shows up and ruins everything lmao
-He has a great sense of humor and can always make others laugh! He’s also very mischievous and sometimes plays pranks on other members of his guild.
-He’s very stubborn when he wants something and not in a good way. He also pouts a lot when he gets like this
-He loves his guild and his guild members man :'( If any of them are ever in any real danger he's quick to offer himself up first as a target. He's protective of his friends and will do anything to keep them safe!
-A very very affectionate person. He mostly shows this through physical acts like hugging and generally touching other people. In return he also craves affection and gets very soft when it’s given back to him. I’d probably say he’s a little touch starved despite being in close contact with others all the time lol
#Me: Time for a new OC! *Writes a novel-length essay about their background*#Kiyo#Among the Stars#ATS#Shima's OCs#This took me way too long to write fnaskbldads god#Original character#Character art#Character design#Digital art#Art#Character sheet#Character reference#Shima arts#Long post#shima-draws
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sleepy haikyuu headcanons 💤
pairings: nishinoya x reader, tendō x reader, kageyama x reader
tw// swearing, violence(?), she//her reader, angst, overthinking, fluff
Yū Nishinoya
midnight pillow fights with Noya 💓
i could leave at that but i shall elaborate
whenever you sleepover at his house (or vice versa), every time y’all say that you are gonna pull an all-nighter and have chaotic fun
but it never works because being chaotic requires a lot of energy, so you both end up falling asleep at like 2AM-ish 🥱
the closest that y’all have gotten to an all-nighter is 5AM
anyway, it’s not a tradition - more like something that just ends up happening every time Noya is over, perhaps a curse lol
but at some time of night, you’ll say something to irk Noya and he’ll throw/hit you with a pillow
not to intentionally start shit but just as playful ‘shut up’ sorta thing
but something about the sharp impact of the pillow just pisses you off and you instinctively launch a pillow right back at him and it’s always a bit harder than you meant for it to be
thus, a pillow fight ensues
Noya had always envisioned a pillow fight with a female as a playful, sensual experience
but there was absolutely nothing playful or sensual about the way you powerbombed him and then proceeded to suffocate him with your pillow
you would both be feistily beating each other with the pillow, the room filling with your battle cries and screams ╰(‵□′)╯
and this would only end once both of your harsh, quick hits turned sloppy and tired
eventually, you’d both just drop unconscious during the fight and wake up in the weirdest positions
Satori Tendō
he is the self-certified ‘worst cuddler’ (ಥ _ ಥ)
not only is he extremely sensitive to temperature, he’s also filled with too much energy to just stay in the same position with you for god knows how long
it’s not that he didn’t like to cuddle, though. 🥺 i mean, nothing made him feel more safe than you in his arms but he was just unable to stop himself from getting restless when he did it for too long
but there were some nights that he wasn’t as fidgety, though
most of the time, it was after a big volleyball game or a hard day at practise and he was absolutely exhausted (_ _)。゜zzZ
he’d literally just detours to your house to catch up like he usually does but his demeanour clearly isn’t the same when he’s worn out so you invite him in for a few minutes and he’d gladly (and gratefully) accepts
he’d just flop down on the couch beside you, his arms just automatically finding your waist and thoughtlessly pulling you against his chest as he laid back, staring at the ceiling
he found himself muttering random things about his day when you asked him, but nothing he said seemed to be in chronological order - unless he brushed his teeth during volleyball practise, which - now that you think about it - doesn’t sound too out of character for him.
his hand found it’s way into your hair and started caressing your scalp, slowly drifting off as the little tune you hummed into his shoulder sent relaxing vibration throughout his body ( ̄o ̄) . z Z
and this wasn’t a one-time thing either, whenever he comes to your house drained from practise, a similar chain of events always end up happening
the only difference being that sometimes it was in your bed rather than on the couch
Tobio Kageyama
i feel like bb has nightmares, like frequently 🥺
i mean, if i was him i’d have nightmares too; he has so much important shit riding on his performance - it’s a miracle that this man can even sleep with how much stress he must be under
like, he’s kinda failing school/ he doesn’t have the best grades and if he doesn’t do well on tests then his opportunity to go to camps and train volleyball could be taken
speaking of volleyball, he probably is so stressed from being a part of a team and having people rely on him - not the mention that he clearly isn’t very good at processing his feelings considering that he expresses most negative emotion he feels towards Hinata in the form of anger
then there is the pressure of keeping his relationships and not naturally distancing himself from the people he loves
like you, for example
he goes to bed with all these horrible thoughts in his head and whenever he tries to think positive, it always backfires
he’ll be like ‘i’m the worst person to be around, it’s clear nobody likes me.’
then he kinda shakes it off like, ‘wait, no. don’t think that. i know that (Y/N) loves me and i love her back.’
but his mind never leaves him alone, ‘am i even sure she loves me? i mean, i act so stand-offish towards her - yeah, she probably barely tolerates me. and she was talking about hinata’s spike yesterday, she’s probably going to dump me for him.’
it was a heart-wrenching thought but what could kageyama do?
for now, he’d just lie down beside you on your bed as you scrolled away on your phone, completely unaware that he just mentally rehearsed how he was going to react when you broke up with him
“goodnight, kags. love you.” you hummed, turning around to place a kiss on his cheeks like you always do when he sleeps over
kageyama nodded, trying to act cool and collected despite the fact he was internally nervous as hell, “night, (y/n).” he paused, trying his best to lift the corners of his lips into a kind - rather than intimidating - smile, “love you too.”
‘look, i called her by her first name - i’m so romantic.’ that was probably the nicest thing he’s thought to himself all day
with that, you both try to get some rest
aaaannnndddddd cue the part when he wakes up in a cold sweat, shivering slightly as he looks over to you with wide eyes to reassure himself that your not gone
his heavy breathing alerts you that he is awake so you pry one eye open to look at him, “not again, tobio.” you said wearily, forcing yourself to sit up and attempt to wrap him in a hug but he just jerked away from your touch
you sighed, “what happened?”
kageyama blinked rapidly, darting his gaze around the room before it finally landed back on you
“i- the walls- and you were almost d-” he began coughing, resulting in you immediately reaching over to your nightstand and handing him the bottle of water you had lying there
he took a few gulps before letting out a refreshed ‘ah’, his stare glued to your lips the whole time
eventually, he was able to grumble “it was nothing.” (⊙_⊙;)
upon hearing his evidently fake answer, you shoved out your bottom lip and whined, “shut up, tobio. i was obviously something; why won’t you tell me?”
“because it was nothing.” he said without missing a beat, then he proceeded to lay down so he could fall back asleep - as if this time it’d go better for him
“Kageyama!” you barked, resulting his eyes jolting back open, “You always have nightmares at my house; I’m starting to wonder if you’re scared of me or something.”
kageyama shook his head before nonchalantly responding, “it’s the cherry blossom air freshener - maybe use vanilla or something next time.” he joked, unable to resist a smile as you playfully punched his shoulder.
you sighed, clearly not going to get an answer out of like every other time you’ve tired, so you just decided to try fall back asleep and try reclaim the little bit of sanity you had left
“(y/n).” kageyama grumbled, wanting to make it seem like he was half-asleep but he was far from it as he pulse was still going crazy as that nightmare shook his to the core. “are you going to dump me? because if you are, now would be a good time.”
he spoke, praying to every deity he could think of that you wouldn’t say yes - but if you did, now would be a good time as he could storm out and since it was dark outside, the streets would be deserted meaning that nobody would be there to witness the tears streaming down his cheeks as he sprinted through the night
you rolled your eyes, “is that what this is about?” you didn’t mean for it to come off so harsh as you actually felt a great amount of sympathy for kageyama but just unable to express it in the way you desired
“stop crying.” you hissed, making kageyama quirk an eyebrow.
“I’m not crying-” he replied until suddenly, he realised that your comment was directed at yourself as you hastily buried your head into his chest and he felt something soak through the fabric of his shirt.
“I’m not going to break up with you kageyama, you stupid moron idiot!” you snapped against his shirt.
don’t ask why that nickname made kageyama’s heart flutter
“get those crazy ideas out of your head or i’ll have to take them out for you 🔪--” you could barely even finish your sentence before both you and kageyama burst out laughing
it was probably just the ambience of being cozy under a blanket with each other in a freezing cold room that reeked of cherry blossom but some how you both some how fell even harder for one another
although what you said wasn’t the most moving or motivating, your intention was clear and from then on, kageyama was a lot more upfront with you💕
he’d tell you if he ever felt uncomfortable or if he was ever worried and you’d either make him feel better or make him laugh and then insist that he goes to talk to suga or daichi
also after that night, (and once you ditched the air freshener and started burning vanilla essence) he only had ‘sweet dreams’ whenever he stayed over at yours
(or at least that is what he said whenever you asked him. in reality, his dreams were about volleyball and tsukishima chasing him through the mall on a velociraptor but whatever, it was a step up from the nightmares anyway. 🏃♂️ 🦖 )
#hq nishinoya#nishinoya x reader#nishinoya x you#nishinoya scenarios#nishinoya x y/n#nishinoya hcs#nishinoya yuu#nishinoya oneshot#nishinoya yu headcanons#nishinoya fluff#nishinoya yu x reader#tendou satori#tendou#tendō satori#tendou hcs#hq tendou#tendou imagine#satori tendo x reader#haikyuu satori#satori tendō#tendou x reader#tendou x y/n#tendou x you#tendou fluff#kageyama x reader#tobio x you#tobio headcanons#tobio fluff#tobio angst#kageyama angst
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make a wish | lucas
title: make a wish pairing: lucas x reader genre: fluff, a little angst request: hiii! can i please request something for wayv lucas where you dont answer his calls or texts for a day because you and the other wayv members were setting up a surprise bday party for him. thank you! word count: 1.7k warnings: hmm none that i can think of... a/n: not sure if i like how this came out, let’s pretend i didn’t post it if it flops 🤡 i felt like this was maybe a little more ~angsty~ than it needed to be altho i wasn’t sure how else to maneuver the surprise bday thing without them blowing the cover lmao...also yea it’s not his bday anymore but life is busy lol
To: Y/N Helloo~~? Y/N, are you ever gonna answer me back?
Seriously, did I do something wrong…
If you’re mad at least tell me why.
Lucas knows you’re not in any kind of danger or distress because he’s seen you be active on your social media accounts, but he can’t understand why you haven’t answered a single one of his calls or texts. Especially since tomorrow is his birthday.
Lucas feels frustrated at not being able to get through to you, and none of the other members seem to know what’s going on even when he asks. They’re close enough to you to have your number and talk to you regularly, but they all claim they haven’t heard anything from you either.
Ten looks up from his phone, seeing Lucas standing in the middle of the room looking bewildered as he stares down at his own phone like it’ll give him an answer. “Maybe Y/N wants a break from you right now,” he suggests, which makes Lucas sweat a bit despite himself. Ten wouldn’t know that. Right? Unless you’d told him something to suggest that.
“Stop trying to destroy happy homes, hyung,” Xiaojun says. “I’m sure it’s not that. Maybe she just needs alone time. Everyone does sometimes.”
“I guess,” Lucas mumbles. But he also knows that you’d usually tell him in advance if that were that case—not just ignore him completely. He thinks about going over to your place to find out what’s going on, but if what Xiaojun said is true, it’d probably be better not to disturb you or make you upset. “Are you sure she hasn’t contacted any of you? You look like you’ve been texting someone all day.”
Lucas tries to lean over Ten and look at his phone screen, but Ten is faster and leaps off the couch and away from him. “Don’t invade my privacy! Stop before you see something you don’t wanna see.”
Xiaojun laughs from where he sits on the ground playing with Bella. “Yeah, remember last time? No one needs a recap of that.” Ten rolls his eyes at that.
Lucas throws himself over the couch where Ten just was, sighing deeply. “Sure, sure. I’ll just suffer here then, lost in the dark without a clue what’s going on...”
Xiaojun brings Bella up to the couch so she can peer up at Lucas with her huge dark eyes, resting her forepaws on his arm. The corner of Lucas’s mouth turns up in a smile and he reaches out to pet her soft furry head. Xiaojun grins when the other man does, and he presses his face into her fur.
“I promise tomorrow will be better. It’s your birthday, after all...just watch.”
Despite Xiaojun’s reassurance, Lucas feels even more uncertain when he wakes up the day of his birthday, especially when he has no idea what the day has in store.
The other WayV members had all left the dorm early in the morning with the reasoning that they had individual schedules or needed to run urgent errands. Though they gave him their birthday wishes and said they’d come back as soon as possible so they could all celebrate, Lucas was more than a little disappointed about being left alone on his birthday. At least he had the pets to keep him company...and the manager and dorm auntie. Although they were nice to have around, they weren’t exactly who he was expecting to spend the day with.
He spends a while throwing toys around for the cats and Bella to play fetch with as he lies on his stomach on the floor, his phone a few feet away from him in case someone decides to call. Maybe someone like you.
Lucas tries a few more times to get in touch with you and still can’t get through, which makes him even more stressed than he was yesterday. Maybe the situation is something more serious than he initially thought? But still, you retweeted a couple things on Twitter just that morning, so it can’t be anything dire or life-threatening.
Lucas tries not to let his feelings bleed into bitterness, though he thinks you’ve picked a fine time to suddenly want to be isolated from everyone else.
A couple hours pass, but the time seems to go even slower than humanly possible. When even the pets become tired of the games and decide to wander off or take a nap, Lucas finally decides to just get dressed and go find something to do on his own for today; he doesn’t know what just yet, but there must be something to do. Just as he’s leaving the dorm, something happens that he previously thought was impossible; he gets a text from you.
From: Y/N Yukhei!! Can you come over?
To: Y/N ?? After ignoring me for a day and a half?
From: Y/N Please. It’s important.
I promise I will make it up to you, but you have to come over right noww 🥺
To: Y/N 😪 Fine, I’ll come over
Lucas makes it over to your place not too long after he finishes texting you. He’s not sure what to expect or what you’ll have to say to him once you see each other—or what he’ll say to you. His interest is piqued even more when he gets a text from you as he’s making his way up the stairs to your apartment.
From: Y/N Just come on in, the door’s unlocked. I’m a lil busy so I can’t get it myself!!
“Busy with what?” Lucas says to himself out loud. Now more curious than he was before, he continues up the stairs until he’s at your door. When he pushes it open, he’s taken aback by the sight of you and the other WayV members standing in front of the entryway.
You’re standing in the middle of them all, holding a cake with lit candles on it and smiling widely at your shocked boyfriend. “Surprise!” you and the other men exclaim all at once. “Happy birthday, Yukhei!!”
Lucas freezes in the doorway with a growing smile on his face, looking at all of you—and your surroundings—incredulously. Your apartment has been done up rather extensively with birthday banners, balloons, streamers, and every other kind of decoration you’d expect to see at a birthday celebration.
You all sing happy birthday to him then, and he watches you and his friends with his eyes sparkling with delight and a bashful smile on his face.
“Wait...is this why you wouldn’t answer me back?” A laugh slips out of him as he covers his mouth, and he feels a bit silly, like maybe he should’ve seen something like this coming. Obviously, you’d never freeze him out on a day like this without a really good reason for it. “Y/N, you did all this for me?”
“Of course! I mean, the guys helped with decorating and setting everything else up ‘cause it was hard to do all that and bake a cake—but you know what I mean.”
Lucas leaves the entryway and steps forward now, still grinning widely. “Wah, you guys told me you didn’t know anything!”
“It wouldn’t be a surprise anymore if we told you.” Hendery laughs.
“Sorry we kept you in the dark for so long, hyung,” Yangyang chimes in, “but as you can see, we did a really good job putting everything together. So it paid off!”
“Now, blow out your candles,” you tell Lucas, bringing the cake forward.
Lucas shakes his head in happy disbelief as he looks down at your creation and chuckles to himself. “You must’ve really worked hard on this...I know baking isn’t your favorite thing to do.”
You laugh sheepishly. “Yeah, well, it took a few failed attempts to get this result, that’s for sure.”
Lucas thinks to himself for a moment, then closes his eyes and blows out the candles. Everyone claps and cheers after he does, and his answering grin is possibly the sweetest thing you’ve seen all day.
Sicheng grins mischievously and suddenly breaks up the moment by saying, “Now, can we eat?”
The rest of the day is spent with you all talking about any and everything, playing games, and watching movies, which eventually ends up with everyone falling asleep in various spots of your living room. You and Lucas got the honor of taking the couch, with Kun squeezed in beside Lucas and currently knocked out, head leaning against the back of the couch.
You and Lucas are the only ones still awake, although it probably won’t be long before you’re off to dreamland too. You can feel yourself getting sleepier, though you try your best to stay conscious. Lucas glances down at you where your body rests in his arms, and he grins to himself, placing his lips on the top of your head for a gentle kiss.
“I want us to stay like this forever, you know. Just the two of us,” he whispers close to your ear.
“Me too…” you murmur, already half-asleep against his chest despite your best efforts.
“It’s what I wished for.”
You perk up a little at that and swat at his arm where it’s wrapped around you. “Noo, don’t tell me or it won’t come true!”
Lucas giggles, and his laughter makes your body shake.
“You don’t have to worry about that when it’s already fated.”
#lucas scenarios#lucas imagines#lucas fluff#wayv#lucas#wayv imagines#wayv scenarios#wayv fic#wayv fluff#nct#nct imagines#nct fic#nct scenarios#nct fluff#lucas fic#ambw#ambw kpop#ambw fic#ambw fluff#ambw scenarios#ambw imagines
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more than
Pairing: Mark + reader, Bestfriend! Mark, Childhood friend!Mark
Genre: Fluff, angst, honestly a little bit of crack LOL
Song recs: Best friend + Untitled + Waiting Room (Rex Orange County), Sofia (Clario)
Warnings: Mild swearing and mentions of alcohol
Word Count: 7.0k (my longest fic yet, wow!)
Summary: You’ve known Mark for all your life, and it only takes one drunken night (plus a little intervention with Haehcan) to think that you wouldn’t mind getting to know him a little better...
Notes: The fact that I actually had the patience to sit down and to write something above 3k words,,,,absolutely astounding, amazing, unique, never been seen before…. Mark is a little awk and always works so hard (poor bby), so imagining him as a super stressed pre-med major and oblivious best friend absolutely wrecks me thank you goodbye
----
When you first meet Mark, you’re eight years old, and it’s at church. He’s dressed in his Sunday best: a light blue button up, khakis, and shiny dress shoes. He looks stiff as your mother introduces you two, with his shirt buttoned all the way to the collar.
It’s not that you dislike him, but you think he might dislike you, with the way he avoids eye contact, eyes tracing the floor, your shoes—anywhere but your face.
You see panic flash through his eyes when his mom gently pushes him towards you, telling him to take you inside and reserve a spot in the pews while she catches up with your mom.
He shuffles awkwardly, and wordlessly, you follow him into the building.
The pews are almost empty, with the bulk of them being filled in the front by the old people that usually have nothing better to do on their Sunday mornings. Although your local church is on the smaller side, it feels unusually large with rows of empty pews, almost eerie. You shudder at shadows the walls make with the stained glass, and hurry to your usual spot towards the middle.
If Mark notices your apprehension, he doesn’t say anything. He’s oblivious, actually, not noticing your absence until he’s almost at the end of the rows. When you see him stop and search for you frantically, you stifle a laugh.
He eventually finds you, and after shuffling awkwardly between the pews, makes his way to you.
“This is kinda far, isn’t it?” he murmurs.
“Huh?”
“I mean,” he stammers. “I usually sit closer to the front. ”
You peer at him from the side. “You actually want to pay attention?”
He scratches the back of his head. “Well yeah, isn’t that the point?”
“I guess,” you say, looking at the ceiling. With the sprawling arches and patterns, the designs are pretty, you think.
“You should at least try, it’s kinda interesting,” when you turn your head to look at him he turns away. “Only if you want to, of course.” he adds, fidgeting with his hands.
When you tell him that maybe you will, you see him crack a small smile.
It becomes a routine, almost every Sunday, with you and Mark sitting next to each other. Whether it’s closer to the front or the back, it’s a whole debate. You usually give in, because when you walk in, Mark is already waiting for you in the front.
….
“Do you still go to Church?”
You’re laying on a green bean bag in Mark’s dorm room, procrastinating on the midterm paper you were supposed to get started on, well, a week ago.
You think for a second, hand raised to rub your chin, just to tease him. “What’s church?”
“C'mon dude, are you serious?”
“Barely,” you say, standing up to move to sit on his bed. “You should really get a new bean bag, it’s kinda deflated.”
Mark ignoring you, reaches over from his desk to fluff up the bean bag. “It’s because you sit on it so much.”
“Are you calling me fat?” and before he can defend himself you finally answer him, “I stopped going in like, middle school. It would be hard even if I wanted to, to find a whole new congregation, and I’m just busy. Also, it’s so boring, I could cry.”
Mark perks up. “Not if you go with me.”
You groan dramatically, and Mark chuckles.
“Good to know that you haven’t changed since you were eight.”
It’s just your view on church, that hasn’t changed since you were eight. First thing things first, you were 19 now, going on twenty. You’re in University now, your second year. It’s been a blur assignments, partying, coffee and term papers- you don’t have time to think about anything else right now. Except maybe actually starting your paper but-
Mark interrupts you midthought, breaking the silence. “Are you still with that guy?”
“Huh? Who? Yuta?”
“Yeah,” Mark responds sheepishly, avoiding eye contact.
You roll your eyes. “No, we haven’t been together for a while. It wasn’t that important so I forgot to tell you.”
You can tell he's surprised about how unusually calm you are for talking about your first serious breakup, but he doesn’t say anything, instead just scratching the back of his head awkwardly in typical Mark fashion. “He was an asshole anyway,” Mark murmurs.
“What did you say?” you ask, acting shocked. “Mark Lee? Talking shit?”
Mark, embarrassed, refuses to repeat it.
“I’m just saying, he wasn’t the right person for you.” he protests.
“As opposed to who? God himself?”
“I can think of a few,” he sighs, but you aren’t paying attention, instead laughing your ass off on his bed.
“You’re insufferable,” he says, standing up to open the door. “C’mon let’s go, I’m hungry. I know you’re not starting that paper anytime soon.”
…
It’s a routine, seeing Mark on Monday afternoons for lunch. Not Friday, because you were busy getting wasted, and consequently not Saturday, because you were too hungover. Not Sunday, because Mark had church, and you, well, were busy praying to God that you would be able to finish all the work you’d neglected over the weekend as a result.
“I still don’t understand why you choose the worst day of the week for this,” you say over your Kale caesar salad, pushing the leaves around aggressively. The University had a lot of healthy options, which you were grateful for. Grateful for you were not, were for the student loans you had to pay off every month, the exorbitant amount you partially owed to all the local and expensive organic produce the meal plan featured for the sake of being sustainable and health conscious.You could really give a rat’s ass about whether your salad was organic or not; if your weekends said anything about you, no amount of kale could help you (or your liver).
“It wasn’t really up to me,” Mark points out. “Maybe if you weren’t too busy being-”
“Ta ta ta,” you tsk, waving a finger around. “I, unlike you, actually have a social life.”
Mark frowns. “I have a social life.”
Mark definitely had a social life. He was popular, even. As popular as you can be, being a preoccupied Pre-med with perfect grades. Mark is likeable. It’s not like he doesn’t have the opportunity to go on weekends if wanted to, he just chooses not to, deciding to slave away at biological functions, orbitals, and lab results instead. Even now, as he takes his glasses off to clean them, you notice the imprint they leave on his face from how long they’ve been sitting on his face, and doesn’t take you long to find the dark circles that grace the skin under his eyes: he’s exhausted.
You frown too. “You should really get out more Mark. You seem stressed.”
Mark gives you a small smile after putting his glasses back on, and then resumes typing on his laptop. “I don’t know how going out would make me less stressed,” he says, distracted. “I would only be more stressed, knowing the work I have to do.”
“Yeah, but you're pretty organized.” You point your fork at him accusingly, kale falling to the side. “Don’t you usually finish things early too?”
“Yeah, I do.” he admits, and before you can press onwards you’re interrupted by a girl you recognize to be his lab partner.
Goggles in hand, you can see the marks they leave around her eye area, but she’s somehow still annoyingly beautiful, with her glossy straight hair and long eyelashes, but that’s not why you dislike her. She might be the most stuck up girl you’ve ever met.
“Did you do the calculations yet?” she says, turning to Mark. ignoring you. It’s only when you cough in your seat that she turns to you. “And hello, (y/n).” An afterthought.
“Hello Yebin,” You give her a wry smile. “How's the lab?”
“The usual.” she glances at Mark, who seems to be doing some finishing touches on said calculations. “How’s Chem 2?”
Boy, does she really grind your gears.
“It was fine, I actually placed out because I took it in high school.” Not to mention, it was a class for freshmen, and you were in fact, now a sophomore.
Before she can say anything back, Mark claps his hands in celebration. “Done! Sorry it took me so long, I just had to double check some things.”
“It’s no problem,” and with the way her voice drips with a sickly sweetness, you want to gag. It’s so painfully obvious. “Are you still down for tomorrow?”
Poor Mark, always oblivious, stops typing on his laptop and looks up in confusion. “Huh?”
You silently laugh at the expression Yebin makes when she realizes Mark has no idea what she’s talking about. “For our study session? The MCAT is just months away.”she reminds him.
Mark remembers. “Oh yeah, about that, I was thinking we could also invite-”
“Great!” she chirps, “See you tomorrow!” and with a flash of her white lab coat, she's gone.
Mark scratches the back of his head. “I guess she had somewhere to be.”
You roll your eyes for what it seems like the 100th time this week, anymore and they might be permanently stuck to the back of your head. “She definitely likes you.”
“Who? Yebin? No way.”
“Yes, Yebin, and yes way.” You fling a walnut from your salad over to his side, and he cringes.
“What is your problem?” he grumbles, and resumes typing on his laptop.
You drop the subject, because you know any talk on girls is completely lost on him. As you set aside your salad, you peer over at Mark, palm supporting your face. He’s focused, eyebrows slightly furrowed, with his lips mouthing over silently whatever science journal he was reading on his computer screen.
Mark has always been good looking, you think. You don’t know why you’ve never really noticed it before. His nose bridge gently slopes over his face, and his jawline is sharp, having lost his baby cheeks years ago. He works out often too, although he barely talks about it (maybe out of fear you’d tease him for being a gym bro). And with the way he’s so adorably awkward, It’s no surprise really, that every girl friend that you’ve met of his seems to be completely smitten.
Shaking your head, you snap out of it. It’s dangerous to think of Mark that way, you think. You’ve known him too long.
“My problem? I think you’re the one with the problem here. I’m surprised your hair isn't completely gray by now.”
Mark ignores you, probably mad at the fact you tried to start world food war three with him with a walnut.
“Hey.” you flick at his forehead to get his attention, and he flinches.
“There’s a party this weekend at Johnny’s fraternity, you should come.” Johnny, being both your long time mutual friend (who’s demeanor is way too nice to fit the stereotypical frat boy image, really) who has since stopped asking Mark out of respect for his “med school grind”.
“I’m already planning on it,” he responds, and you’re surprised.
“Since when do you actually accept party invitations?”
“Since yesterday, because I’m tired of Haechan bothering me about it.”
You silently cheer, of course, you expect nothing else from Haechan.
…
“I never knew it was so hard to get booze.”
“It’s not hard if you’re 21.”
Scoffing, you turn your head to face the boy across from you. As if he can feel the burn of your gaze on his forehead, Haechan stops typing on his Macbook and lifts his eyes to meet yours.
“No shit Sherlock, but last time I checked, we both weren’t 21.”
The sun had set a half an hour ago, and despite having spent the whole afternoon together, you and Haechan have had yet to come up with a way to secure the drinks you promised your friends for tonight’s pregame. With both of you being certified schemers representing your respective friends, you guess it wasn’t that big of surprise that the responsibility was left on both your shoulders. It beat scavenging alone, and spending time with Haechan wasn’t so bad either, when you two weren’t trying to kill each other.
It was already late, and Haechan had deemed Ubering to the nearest packer store that sold Soju (the sweet sweet liquid of choice) was too much work. You on the other hand, had dismissed that option for a completely different reason. The issue in question was the flimsy, borderline pathetic excuse for a fake ID Haechan planned to use at the packer store.
“Hey it works!” he protested. “You just act like you’re already legal and they don’t even card you. Easy.”
You roll your eyes as Haechan theatrically reenacts his last trip to the packer store.
“I asked him how he was doing, and he told me school sucks. I say to him, ‘Tell me about it, thank god this is my last year!” and as if to emphasize his next point, he flicks his wrist in the air, ID snuggled between his index and middle finger. “And I was on my way. No issue at all.”
“That’s because he didn’t even see your fake I.D stupid. He would’ve called you out on your bullshit in an instant.”
Out of all the different options available, you could not fathom why he chose his fake ID to show that from all the places in this world, he was from freaking Hong Kong. There were fifty states to choose from, other English speaking countries, and he chose to pose as an international student on a student visa. He could most definitely look the part, but after looking at the ID he proudly slaps on the common room lounge desk, you deadpan. The yellowish tint to the card was way too suspicious to be taken seriously.
“I wish we could just ask Mark,” you sigh, and Haechan looks at you like you’re stupid.
“He’s 20, ya dimwit.”
“I know, that’s why I said I wish. You have serious hearing problems.”
Haechan stops typing on his laptop to shoot you an especially heated glare, and you’re reminded again why he’s #2 on your fight list, right above Yebin. First place was taken by the girl you almost actually fought at that one University party a town over, wherever she is you hope she’s having a terrible day.
“If it were not for the rules of this land, you’d be dead right now Haechan.”
Haechan places his head in his palms, and flutters his eyelashes disgustingly.
“But you love me.”
“Yes, as much as Mark loves social events. Speaking of Mark, how on earth did you get him to leave his cave?”
“It didn’t take much,” and before you can call him out for lying, he shushes you.
“Okay, maybe a few days of nonstop begging.” Haechan says as his eyes dart across the laptop screen. You raise your eyebrow. “And I might have threatened to release pictures from the photoshoot his mom made him take when he was younger.”
“I expected nothing less from your evil, evil, mind.”
He scoffs. “Hardly. Just resourceful.”
Resourceful he is, because Haechan is the one who ends up finding a plug for the alcohol that night.
…
A can of four loko, a bottle of soju, and a few shots later, you should be hammered, wasted even. But after 14 months, 2 weeks, and 5 days into college, your tolerance is pretty high, so you’re really just plain drunk. Even so, you’re a little messy (no surprise). You’re not in a state to be trusted with any errands, so you don’t understand why Haechan asks you to pick up Mark along the way to Johnny’s fraternity.
“Why do I have to do it?” you whine, putting your hand over your forehead, and Haechan only laughs at your dramatic display of despair.
“Because Johnny messaged me that Mark isn’t there, and there’s no way in hell I’m letting him flake on me this time. ”
You point a finger at him, and he stifles a snort when you’re off by a couple inches. “Letting him flake on me, me, me as in you! It’s not my problem.”
But there’s no use in arguing with Haechan, and you know it. That’s why you find yourself stomping your way up the second floor of Mark’s dormitory like you’re in elementary school again, having just been scolded by your mom and being forced back into your room.
You knock at his door impatiently, and it feels like forever until you hear some shuffling, and see the door knob twist open. To be honest, it’s probably just a few seconds, but time is different when you’re intoxicated.
Before you even see him, it smells faintly of shampoo and detergent, so you’re not surprised when he opens the door and you see his hair is still half wet from the shower. He’s definitely party ready, and when you mean party ready, he’s wearing the same loose black tee and grey joggers he wears to sleep. His socks don’t match and you try not to laugh, because it would be a bad look for you, to show up intoxicated, and apparently crazy.
“Oh (y/n), what are you doing here? Oh shit is today Friday? I totally forgot, Haechan is going to kill me-'' He looks at you and then pauses, scrunching up his nose. “Have you been drinking?”
“No.” you say sarcastically, but it definitely falls short of Mark because he looks at you like he does not believe you. Good, because he shouldn’t.
He sighs, and ushers you in his room. It’s dark, with the only light emitting from the little steel lamp on his desk, which is covered with his notes, pencils, a textbook, and some highlighters. When you finally make your way to his bed (with difficulty) he sighs again, and you silently scold yourself for having that mini drinking contest with Haechan. If you thought you could handle your alcohol well, Haechan was an absolute monster.
You nearly screech when Mark flashes a mini flashlight in your face, and he tells you to calm down before someone thinks he’s committing murder. He holds your face still with his index finger resting on your cheek and his thumb lifting your chin. You try your best not to squint when he tells you to, instead focusing on his face. He’s so close, you can feel his warm breath on your face. If you weren’t already so flushed from drinking, you suspect you’d look beet red now.
“Well, your pupils still dilate normally, so I don’t think you have alcohol poisoning-”
The world is moving a little, so you plop backwards on his bed— albeit a little harder than expected because he rushes over to you and looks concerned.
“-but I don’t think that’s the problem here.” he finishes.
Your eyes are closed, mainly because his bed is really comfy. “I’m here to pick you up.” and as if to emphasize your point, you wildly start pointing in all directions, hoping it would land on him.
You open your eyes when you feel him grab your finger and turn it thirty degrees to the left, just stopping at his chest. Your sense of direction must be really bad, because it turns out you were pointing at nothing.
“I don’t think we’re going anywhere for awhile”
“Noooooo” you wail, and Mark lets go of your hand to sit back down on his desk, and unsurprisingly, begins reading his textbook again. How he is able to focus with you in the background, you don’t know, but it must have taken years of practice.
At this point, you decide to take matters into your own hands. You shove yourself off the bed and grab his arms from behind him. His roller chair scoots a few inches before he stops it.
“You’re not exactly making great case for yourself here”
“Stop making excuses!”
You aim straight towards the armpits, and you’re confused at the lack of reaction, so you reach over to squeeze his knee. Almost immediately, he crumples over, almost falling off the chair.
“Can you-” he says mid laugh, “please” he gasps, “Stop that!”
You respond by attacking his other knee, and it’s over. He falls off his chair and you go down with him. The difference is that he recovers quickly, and starts tickling you back in revenge.
You’re sensitive, so it feels like you’re dying. You try to use his arm as leverage to push yourself up, but next thing you know he’s toppeling over you. You close your eyes and wait for your head to kiss the cold hard floor but it never comes, because Mark's hand cradles your head, breaking the fall.
When you open your eyes, he’s closer than ever before, noses touching. Lips a mere centimetres away and in a weird embrace, you resist the urge to close the distance.
Mark has always been good looking, especially now, so close to you. You don’t know why you’ve never noticed it before.
When he pulls away he’s flustered, and for the first time, so are you.
It’s an awkward silence, with you still on the floor as he stands up, rubbing the dusk from his knees. He scratches the back of his head and offers you a hand
“Let’s head out,” he says.
“Yeah, let’s.” you echo.
…
Although Haechan berates you for being more than a little late to the party, he’s overjoyed that you somehow managed to show up with Mark. Not that he didn’t have faith in you anyways, he tells you. It’s just that Mark is married to his Biology textbook, and she runs a tight ship. By the time you reached the frat with Mark, you’ve sobered up enough to enjoy yourself normally,
It’s when you wake up in the morning, that you’re not okay. It’s not okay, because you dreamt of Mark, and that’s weird, because you and Mark were just friends, right? And you always will be.
It’s not a big deal because friends dream of friends. Dreams are a product of your own desires environment, you tell yourself, it’s perfectly normal because you spend so much time with him.
What is not normal, is when you see Mark the following Monday, and are worried about it. You’re nervous the whole time, and it gets worse when you slide the little watermelon filled tupperware container across the table in apology for last Friday. He likes his watermelon cut up into little cubes, you remembered (why do you remember?), and you avoid his eyes, pushing a stray piece of hair behind your face.
Mark, oblivious as usual, doesn’t really notice anything until 10 minutes in, as if your lack of rambling surprises him. Munching on the cubes, he asks if you’re okay.
“Yeah, I am.”
No you are not. You are utterly fucked.
…
“But you need to promise me you won’t judge or make fun of me for it”
“Just say it already, Jesus.”
“It’s just so embarrassing.”
“Oh my god, are you in love with me?”
“No!”
When placing your hands in your face, Haechan grants mercy on you, patting you on the back instead of teasing you further.
“I don’t know what else could be so important that you need to talk to me in person. Unless…. it’s about Mark?”
His hands stop soothingly rubbing your back and instead starts slapping it, waiting for you to laugh along with him. When he doesn’t get a response he gasps. Turning his head sideways to face you, he pries your fingers apart.
“No fucking way.”
“Right?” you moan.
“I was just joking, but I can’t say I didn’t expect it.”
You remove your hands from your face and look at him, confused. “What do you mean?”
“Like, you’ve known each other forever. You spend a lot of time together too. Someone was bound to catch feelings eventually.”
You don’t respond, instead choosing to sulk.
“You know I’m right. You just don’t want to admit it because you’re the loser in this situation.”
Right he is, because you’ve been avoiding Mark for the past few weeks like the plague. You’ve told him that you’ve been busy with your final term paper (you’re not, you’re an engineering major why would you have one?), and although he was a little confused, he was probably also a little thankful because the MCAT was only a month away.
As you tell him about your plight, Haechan listens thoughtfully, “mhming” and “ahh-ing” at all the right places.
“I don’t see how ignoring him helps you at all. I would say to just talk to him about it, but it’s Mark, he probably hasn’t thought about you that way at all.”
“Thanks,” you grumble. “So I’m basically one of the boys.”
“No really, mans might as well be the anemone from Nemo, I’ve never seen him interested in anyone.” Haechan sighs. “This is a tough one.”
“I’m sure I’ll think of something, but I might have to get creative.”
“I’d like to see you try Hyuck.”
…
It’s 9pm Sunday night, and there’s a knock on your door. It’s strange you think, because it’s a Sunday, and it’s a little late to be doing anything.
When you open the door, there he is, Mark Lee in all his 5’9’ glory, with a little bag in hand, in it your favorite milk tea.
“It’s Sunday.” you say, intelligently.
Mark just chuckles. “Yes it is, and your point?”
You step aside so he can walk in, and you’re embarrassed at your current state. For once, you’ve finished your assignments early, so you’ve spent the past four hours in your pajamas watching K-dramas and snacking on honey chips. You must look like a bum.
Mark on the other hand, always looks good, even in some old dress slacks, and an old t-shirt with some holes in it. He smells faintly of antiseptic, so he must have just come from a volunteering shift at the hospital.
“It’s nice of you to drop by,” you poke the straw into the bubble tea. “And thank you for the bubble tea.”
“You’ve been busy recently so I figured you’d need it for the caffeine content, but it’s not like you sleep anyway.” he jokes. “How’s the term paper going?”
“The term paper? Oh right, the term paper. It’s alright,” you lie. “Just a couple of pages left. Beats having to take the MCAT though.”
Mark looks tired, with his hair slightly overgrown and his dark circles hallower than usual. You feel bad—he has a habit of overworking himself; you’re usually there to check on him but lately you haven’t, and he’s kind and thoughtfull enough to bring you something because he thinks you’re stressed.
“Yeah tell me about it,” Mark takes a seat next to you on your bed, head hitting the wall with a soft thump. “It’s going to be all over next week though, I can’t wait. I’ve missed you though.”
Busy silently cursing at yourself for the way your heart flutters at his admission, you forget to respond. Mark frowns, places his hand on your thigh in an attempt to soothe you, and it has the opposite effect—you think you might go into cardiac arrest.
“Is something wrong?”
“N-no.” you stammer. “Just stressed. ”
Mark makes things worse by leaning in closer, gently placing the back of his hand on your forehead. “You’re kinda hot.”
“I am?”
“Yeah, like I think you may be running a fever.”
He hops off the bed, and rummages around in his little black bag, and pulls out a thermometer. He places a little sleeve on the end, and motions for you to open your mouth. When it beeps, he takes it out of your mouth and looks at the result.
“Your temperature is fine, but you should rest. I’ll see you soon okay?” He pats your head. “Take it easy, I know you’ll do great.”
…
You might not have a term paper, but what you do have is a physics final.
The desk area is littered with eraser dust, crumpled paper, and half filled styrofoam cups of coffee that have since gotten stale. You swear to god that Physics was a subject meant to torture, not enrich the lives of college students. At this rate, you were seriously debating dropping out to become a stripper.
Haechan, not sensing your dismay, disrupts your plans to drop out by telling you something that puts a damper on the rest of your day, as if Physics wasn’t doing that already.
“Have you noticed that Mark’s been hanging out a lot with that one girl lately? What’s her name? So-bin, Yee-ben, Ben 10, ”
“Yebin,” you snap. “And don’t ever disrespect Ben 10 like that again. ”
Haechan lifts his hands up, “ I agree she’s a total bitch, but man is she hot.”
“Aren’t you supposed to make me feel better, not worse?”
Haechan’s face softens and for once in his life, looks a little sorry. “All I’m saying is if you don’t do something soon, someone might do it for you. I overheard her saying something about her and Mark going to spring fling together.”
He’s not wrong, but Mark, at Spring fling? At a Darty? Willingly? His idea of a good time was studying.
“You’re kidding,” you scoff. “As if he’d be caught dead at something like that.”
“I don’t know (y/n). He doesn’t really have much else to do now that the MCAT is over.”
Right, the MCAT. He took it last week. You mentally slap yourself for not asking how it went.
“Speak of the devil.” Haechan says quietly, motioning behind you.
There she is through the glass, Yebin, pulling a seat next to Mark, not before sneaking up behind him and planting a fat kiss right on his cheek.
…
Maybe if this were a movie, you’d cry all weekend and he’d make it up to you; But this is real life, so you secretly cry for a week and sulk for the rest of the month, blaming your puffy eyes on seasonal allergies (In real life, Mark can’t make it up to you because he did nothing wrong. He’s also not even aware that you like him, but that’s besides the point).
Despite Haechan’s attempt to convince you that it could’ve been just a friendly kiss, a greeting kiss, a whatever kiss, you insist that you’re done with your little crush, that it had shriveled up and died. Although not so convinced, Haechan drops the subject all together and instead resorts to comforting you in his own way, which mainly just consists of making fun of you about other things.
Mark is a touchy subject, and you’re still avoiding him. Why? You don’t really know. You know it’s not fair to Mark, who is probably very hurt and confused at your lack of communication. Nonetheless, he doesn’t question it, and is so infuriatingly mature with his emotions that you suspect that he even respects it, because he stops texting you after a while.
You feel bad about stonewalling him, leaving him in the dark, but really, what would you say to him?
“Sorry-I-haven’t-been-talking-to-you-it’s-just-that-I’m-in-love-with-you-and-I’m-butthurt-that-you-have-a-girlfriend-of-course-it’s-not-really-your-fault-but-”
You shudder at the thought, because it’s just plain embarrassing.
But really, you’re not the best at expressing your emotions—you’ve never been. Frankly, you’re tired of expressing your emotions because it never got you anywhere. Not with your mom, not with your dad, and definitely not with Yuta, who you dated for a year and half a year just to dump you like you were nothing.
It’s not worth it, to put your emotions on the line for anyone, not anymore. You locked your heart away a long time ago, and you were a fool to let it come out last time, and you like to think you learn from your mistakes.
At least, that’s what you think, until you return home one Sunday night from the library and see a little cup of your favorite milk tea at the door, with a straw neatly balanced on the top.
…
When spring fling rolls around, you still haven’t spoken to Mark, and if your friends catch on, they don't mention it. They know by now that you prefer to deal with things alone, to digest them for what they are and then promptly moving on—you know, like processing a death.
It doesn’t really matter, you think. You and Mark have always been friends, and will always be friends. Nothing more, nothing less. And when you get over yourself, things will be fine.
But really, how can it be fine when your whole world stops every time Mark looks at you?
You try not to dwell on it, even now weeks later. You’re busy getting ready to go out, blotting your lipstick on some tissue paper in your friend Yuna’s bathroom.
“(y/n), you look amazing.”
When you turn to look at yourself in the mirror she’s right; The mascara you put on your lashes really brings out the color of your eyes, and your skin (thanks to Yuna’s highlighter compact) is literally glowing. You feel really pretty.
You turn to smile at her. “Thanks to you.” you tell her, and she gets bashful, pushing you out of the seat and ushering you out the door. You make it down stairs no problem, but she calls you as soon as you walk out the door.
“Yes, I have blotting papers with me, and no, I am not dating Haechan I’ve told you thousands of times-”
“What about me?”
You turn around to find Haechan leaning against the dormitory wall, already waiting.
Embarrassed, you tell her you need to go and hang up the phone.
“How long have you been standing here? Hopefully not too long.” You apologize, but he assures you it’s all right.
“Are you sure your friends are fine with you leaving them early to go with me?”
“Yes Haechan, they’re just happy that I have someone to go with.” you sigh. “Almost too happy.”
He laughs, after looking at you, he pauses. “You look nice.”
“You do too, Hyuck.”
If you didn’t know any better, you would say he seems embarrassed at your compliment.
When you walk into the venue, you’re not surprised at how spacious it is. You’re used to your school going all out, from the kale salads and now, spring fling. They might as well call it spring semi-formal, because everyone is dressed their best.
You see Johnny at the end of the punch table, and he waves, motioning for you two to join him.
“And my favorite couple,” he greets you two, and you almost smack him upside down the head.
“Relax, I’m just kidding.” and he leans in for a hug. “How are you (y/n), I haven’t seen you in a second.”
“I’m good, just been super busy. You were so right, Professor Kim has been really keeping me on my toes in Physics 430,” you laugh. “Every time I walk into the classroom I can feel my life flash through my very eyes.”
He laughs, and you all laugh with him. Johnny tends to have that kind of effect on people.
“How’s Mark?” he asks, and you cringe. “It’s been a while.”
You laugh nervously “ I haven’t seen him in a while either.”
“Oh really. Don’t you see each other every week?”
“Well we used to,” you panic. “Just not anymore because, you know, I-”
“Because you’ve been so busy,” Haechan finishes.
Johnny gives you two a strange look but continues talking anyway.
“Well that’s life. Poor boy’s been studying for the MCAT like his rent is due tomorrow.”
“More like everyday.” Haechan snickers.
Johnny doesn’t hesitate to flame Haechan for his insolence, and begins teasing him for almost failing Calc II (Calc II was kind of hard you admit but that is an admission that will die with you), meanwhile, you’re whisked away by Yuna and her entourage. You glance at Johnny and Haechan, who bid you farewell with a nod of their heads.
It’s fun, you’re having a great time dancing, and eating mini hot dogs on a toothpick (you guess your university had to cut corners somewhere). When Roxanne plays, you and Yuna go wild, nearly knocking over a waiter over with a silver tray. You have so much fun, that you forget that Mark Lee exists until you make eye contact across the floor.
It's no surprise that he’s with Yebin, who looks annoyingly prettier than usual, with her makeup all done and satin dress. She’s pulling him in the opposite direction, but Mark seems to pay no mind, instead staying in place, looking at you. A moment passes, and you see him excusing himself. When he begins to head your direction. You panic.
Before you can even react, you feel an arm wrap around your waist, pulling you close. When you finally turn to see who it is, you’re nose to nose with none other than Haechan.
“What are you doing?”
“Just go along with it,” Haechan whispers through his teeth. Your hands are pressed against his chest, and he grabs one of your arms, placing it around his neck.
“Go along with what? Have you lost your mind-”
Before you can finish your sentence, his lips press against yours and your mind goes blank. He tastes like peppermint and aftershave, with his lips soft in the center and just a little chapped around the edges.
When you two finally part, Mark is nowhere to be found, and you don’t know how to feel.
“Haechan I-” you stammer. “I need to go.”
You hurry off, and he doesn’t follow you.
…
When you’re outside, it’s cold; the air is brisk and definitely doesn’t help steady your breathing, it only makes it harder. It’s a lot to process, Mark, Yebin, Haechan. It’s a lot, and you feel like you’re in emotional overdrive, with all the feelings you’ve been trying to keep in for the past few months coming back to bite you.
You sit down at the edge of the fountain outside the venue, and you nearly get soaked. It misses you by mere inches, with the ceramic fish looking at you almost mockingly. You don’t care, with all the thoughts running through your head right now, you think you might go insane.
You don’t know how long you’ve been sitting there at the fountain when you feel something wrap around you, warm like it was just taken out of the dryer. It smells familiar, like cologne and faintly of antiseptic—it smells like Mark.
You don’t look at him when he sits down next to you, legs open, hands crossed. And he doesn’t look at you. It’s radio silent.
“So you and Haechan, huh.”
“So you and Yebin.” you echo.
Mark looks at you for the first time, confused. “What are you talking about?”
“You know what I mean.”
“Oh that.” He shuffles awkwardly. “I don’t really like her like that.”
Your head raises in surprise, and you face each other for the first time in months.
“I thought you guys had a thing.”
Mark scratches the back of his head. “Well we do, but it’s just in her head” he says, and you can’t help but laugh. “She came onto me last week, so I finally set things straight.” Noticing your reaction, he just shakes his head.
“I don’t think it worked though,” he adds.
“I would think, you’ve always been too nice for your own good.”
“I just didn’t want to hurt her feelings, you know?” he murmurs. “I feel terrible.”
“You’re not a terrible person just because you don’t like someone back.”
“Maybe not, but I believe not wanting you and Haechan to be together does.”
It takes a moment for his words to register within you, and even after you process them, you’re not sure what to say.
“We don’t like each other like that.” you interrupt him.
Mark looks visibly confused. “Then you and Haechan aren’t??” his voice falters.
“No more than you and Yebin. I promise you it’s not what it seems like.” you tell him and it finally clicks. You’d have to thank the idiot later. Right after you slap him.
Mark doesn’t question it, not even when you start crying. You don’t question it either, unsure of why you’re crying.
“You’re so stupid,” you sniffle. “I’ve liked you for so fucking long.”
Mark pulls out his pocket square to gently wipe the tears from your face, and places his hand on top of yours.
“You’re ridiculous, you know that? You could have just said something.” his says softly
“I didn’t want to ruin anything. We’ve always just been friends.”
“I think we’ve always been just more than that.” he says, leaning in, hands cup your face gently.
“Just took some of us a little longer to realize.”
....
“That was very nice of you,” Johnny says.
“Yeah. Very nice.” Haechan echos.
“How long has it been, that you’ve liked her for? Three years?”
“Two going on three.”
Johnny lets out a low whistle, and looks down at the younger boy worriedly. “Are you sure you’re okay with this?”
Haechan glances at you and Mark through the glass, outside the venue. With Mark whispering in your ear and you laughing, you seem so happy; happier than you’ve ever been with him.
“Yeah, I am. More than okay.”
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